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I think having to be up with the chickens is a big drawback!LOL!
I'm sorry that chickens have things to do, that they need to be up early! They are motivated! They do not have time to worry about who they might inconvenience by their success!
The first time I wed, it was with my high school sweetheart who just loved where I lived, loved the farm, cows, my family, etc. After 11 years together...nine of which was in marriage, it ended in divorce.
Towards the end of it she really started to loathe farm life. She hated the endless work, wanted to always go out somewhere, and on weekends would often say its Friday Night, or its Saturday Night we have to go out. She started to hate the house I built for her too (yes from felling the trees to building the cabinets) and even the fun things like snowmobiling and 4 wheeling bored her.
So then I met my current wife. The first weekend together she blew me away when she said she just wanted to stay home for the weekend. "Oh this one is perfect" I thought. Nope, not so. 4 Years later she hates this place too. Oh she brags about the cows and sheep, tractors, acreage and our new Amish neighbors...but she cannot stand to spend a moment at home anymore. She goes endlessly shopping, hates the fact that I always have to work, really hates spending money on farm related things, etc. She will help with the cows/sheep when I really need help, but I don't think she is really into it. That's not good when you are a farm wife.
A cousin of mine is a farmer as well and manages one of the farms in the family. He is a workaholic by any standard and can spend 18-20 hours a day on the farm. At 50 years old he would make for a great husband. Nice guy, seldom gets mad, good sense of humor and just adores kids. I bet he has potty trained at least 10 kids over the years because we tend to use the farm as a babysitter. He's also got morals of the highest order...never been with a lady if you know what I mean. It's true. Even when we forced him to go out to Vegas for a vacation, he would not go to any kind of establishment where the women aren't so reputable. Wanted nothing to do with them, but admits he would love to be married.
I can't figure it out. We are good people. We don't hit women by any means, and we certainly don't demean them. We aren't promiscuous either, are good with kids, do more work in a day then most people do in a week, and can carry on conversations about soil amendments for pansies, or discuss antibiotics for dogs and anything in between. That is saying nothing about fixing stuff around the house, building stuff and are home all the time in case you need something. Holy cow, compared to most husbands I think we are pretty good fish to catch. But atlas not so...
Why?
First off you need to check and see if the cows have any wigs hanging in the stalls.. Cousin Buford is relieving stress somehow. As for women it's the same old story. they will say and do anything to get married and then at some point they get real.. Women are never satisfied and to marry a farm girl you might need to look in a farming community.
"Green Acres" was a comedy TV show but it did have some realism to it.
First off you need to check and see if the cows have any wigs hanging in the stalls.. Cousin Buford is relieving stress somehow. As for women it's the same old story. they will say and do anything to get married and then at some point they get real.. Women are never satisfied and to marry a farm girl you might need to look in a farming community.
"Green Acres" was a comedy TV show but it did have some realism to it.
I know you guys are having a little fun with this, but I don't think this guy was expecting her to be up with the chickens or work side by side with him all the time. Part of living the farm life is understanding that the farm DOES come first if you are going to keep the farm. It's just like how anyone who has a day job must make that a priority if they are going to keep it. Yes, there must be balance, but a "farm wife" understands that if the farm doesn't succeed- they don't succeed. I have some relatives in my family who lived the farm life raising animals and growing crops. It is hard work- plain and simple. It's unfortunate that the little farms are disappearing. We are only going to have more issues with all the hormones being injected by the large factory farms. Just look at all the salmonella and bacteria outbreaks we have had with spinach, lettuce, and even eggs. Sparboe Farms (big egg producer) lost several large contracts (McDonalds, Target and other chains) and one can only hope this sent a big message- but it will only be short lived if anything IMO.
This guy just wants someone to live the American dream with him.
I know this is a tough situation. Had a close friend who fell in love w/a Rye Grass Farmer. He is a terrific guy. They married had several terrific kids. She helped w/the running of the machinery in the fields. When her asthma proved too much during the high season she started to take off to Hawaii for weeks at a time. No problems for years and years. All of a sudden...she's gone, no longer happy or content even though she lived a terrific life. Her time wasn't demanded of her and she had all the sweet amenities of life anyone could ask for. A handsome loving husband, a house built for her from the ground up, great kids, new car, vacations at her request and a Christian family/life. Don't know what soured her. Personally, I have always thought it was the 'Church factor' that intruded. But who will ever know.
Koale
Nice guys finish last is an excuse for crooks and a way for wimps to complain. Nice guys dont finish last, but naive people do finish last. Anyone wants time outside of work, and whether you're an i-banker or CEO putting all your time into your job or a farmer putting everything into your work there, in the end, if you neglect your spouse and you both dont get things out of the relationship, it is going to become miserable for one of the people.
Enough with this nice guys finish last line people, it is ridiculous.
This is my favorite "city couple turned farmers" movie. It's also the original Ma and Pa Kettle movie and the book is great too and you can watch the whole thing on youtube I think.
I know farm life and I know what works and what doesn't.
It is as simple as putting your woman first (or vise versa). Put the marriage first and everything else falls into line. Put the kids first, and the marriage may crumble. Same here. Men who put the farm first set themselves up for failure.
If the woman wants to go out, take the woman out!
Mine swears up and down she is a red blooded, "hey y'all", woman of the land yet I don't hear no flack when I say put your best dress on, lace up those heels, we're going out this Friday night. It is called romancing.
It takes a whole lot more than a roof over her head to make a woman happy. There needs to be that social outlet. I, along with many men I know, could spend a day chopping firewood completely alone then go to bed that night completely content.
So what is your definition of going out all of the time? We go out all of the time and it isn't just to the local bar to splurge money away. Sometimes it is lunch with friends, a hike and picnic, the fair, swim in the river, bonfire and beer, to the local greenhouse, and sometimes just to the WalMart for the walk around. She even comes with me to the barber to catch up on any gossip the barber may have.
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