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he does have male friends, too. He is just a social person, I think. But I feel funny sometimes after spending time with certain females. Then I act funny , he noticed I was very quiet after this last time, and then I get over it but how can I tell if I can handle this or not because my reactions are not good. And I know it's mostly me, all me even, so how can I control myself better so that I don't negatively affect the relationship? I really like him, I think deep down Im a jealous person , maybe.
You can't. Jealousy is embedded deep into your soul. Most jealous people aren't able to change that. So, you're either going to have to grin and bear it or drop him. I prefer that you do the latter.
Uh-Uh, hon. Once a man decides to get into a monogamous relationship with a girl and he starts introducing her to people as his 'girlfriend', then all his female friends need to fall back and respect that. And, HE needs to respect the fact that now that he has a girlfriend, things change, like wanting to go visit FEMALE FRIENDS. He could be spending that time with YOU, but yet, she's on his mind. I personally wouldn't have liked that either, and you have a right to be pissed.
The only issue that I have with you is, you've only been dating this guy for 1 month and you're already having sex with him. You're moving WAY too fast. You should still be in the dating phase, getting to know one another, to see if this would be someone you'd like to pursue something long-term with in the future, but yet you're knocking boots with him already.
I'm sorry, but it just doesn't seem like he's THAT into you and that you're more into him than he is into you. Sounds like he just wants the physical aspect of it and he's playing mind games with you because you're allowing him to.
I'd cut my losses now and move on. You're only a month into it. It shouldn't be THAT hard to let go.
I know, AND he is already sleeping over...girl you sound too young to be caught up with some guy who is not even your "forever".
As far as female friends...Little Mizz I have to disagree. You see, 2 of the groomsmen in my wedding were MY friends who of course were men. Both were my former college roomates and very, very dear family friends. Once I was dating my husband to be, I still continued to hang out with them. Now though, we mostly all hang out together, but I do still see them on my own too
I know, AND he is already sleeping over...girl you sound too young to be caught up with some guy who is not even your "forever".
As far as female friends...Little Mizz I have to disagree. You see, 2 of the groomsmen in my wedding were MY friends who of course were men. Both were my former college roomates and very, very dear family friends. Once I was dating my husband to be, I still continued to hang out with them. Now though, we mostly all hang out together, but I do still see them on my own too
But do you hang out with them as much now, ALONE, as you used to when you were single?
This situation is a very good examply of why waiting to have sex is a good thing.
I don't see how that fits into the picture at all. A woman with problems is a woman with problems, regardless of when or where sex happens. Might as well have sex sooner, so the stink hits the fan sooner.
The OP is completely overreacting and being immature. A strong & confident woman doesn't immediately size all other women up as "the competition" or wait to see her guy with other girls in order to "see if she's hurt". Unfortunately there are too few strong & confident women in the world. So the OP's reaction is average.. kind of like the behavior on Family Guy is also average.. (meaning, immature and rather dumb)
The OP sounds like she won the lottery of boyfriends. If he has a lot of girlfriends then surprise! He must be good with relating to women! So why not enjoy that? Doesn't every woman want a man who is popular with women? (Yes.) So treat your time with him as a gift that you can share with each other!
Ive been dating a guy for about 1 month. He texts me / calls me a lot , sees me a lot and is very affectionate with me. I knew he had a lot of female friends, one in particular bothered me , (becasue I know she is a person who, as she stated, becasue of past sexual abuse, has to have sex everyday.), and now she is breaking up with her boyfriend.
So, he wanted to see her when he came to see me yesterday. , her and I live on the same side of town, about a mile apart. So anyways, I agreed to go to her house, encouraged it even becasue I wanted to see the 2 of them together. There wasn't anything there, though being that they both seem to need somone in thier lives , (when they are single) I could see them together at some point. (After him and I split, of course ,perhaps the reason him and I split.....)
I say that (the reason him & I split) is because what did disturb me about the visit is that he treated her just like he treats me. Compliments (the same ones) etc. I felt so unspecial. Almost like his female friend , but I happen to be the one who has sex with him. She also has a history of men being a little violent with her and is a disturbed (a little off mentally, on meds) person in general and her aura along with the disappointment of not feeling special to my boyfriend b/c he treated her as well as he treats me, made me sick. I am still sick to my stomach.
What is you guys take on all of this? I did not sleep with him last night (as he didn't even bring his stuff to stay over!) and I was disturbed. He wanted to have sex but I wasn't into it.
I'm in a similar situation. My husband has a lot of females friends and one in particular bothers me because she's always having "man problems". I told my hubby that it'll be a matter of time before she comes on to him with that "I wonder how it would of been" mess. After many arguments between him and I over this chick, he would say "we're just friends, it's nothing like that", anyway after I would fuss at him all the time about this female she finally did what I knew she would. She came on to him. Although he didn't return the same feelings towards her I was soooooo mad at him for not listening to me. I know everyone has that sixth sense. Especially women. We usually can sense when another woman may be trouble but we come off as insecure, or whatever. I would ask you "what does your "gut" tell you"? Try hard to avoid the drama that can come with the issue. Trust me, you don't want to waste your time on a bunch of mess. However, they may be really close friends. And she has been leaning on him for support with her issues. So what does he do when he's with a girlfriend that he cares about and he has a "girlfriend" that he's cares about? If it bothers you that bad, then don't put yourself through all of the drama, it's only been a month but it will turn into months, and years before you know it.
There is a big difference between long-term, true friends that happen to be of the opposite sex and friends of the opposite sex that nothing happended with because of circumstances...like other bf/gfs being in the way. Sometimes opposite-sex friends are attracted to each other and just never did anything about it...or limit the encounters to between bf/gfs...these are the friends we sense trouble with if we are in-tune with our guts. OP, hearing your posts has led my gut to believe that these 2 have probably already had sex and may/may not continue to do so whether you are in his life or not. I had a good male friend back in NYC...we were never in love, but we hooked up between relationships...the attraction was always there, despite the fact that we never wanted a relationship with each other...we had a common circle of friends, and so were always introduced to the current bf/gf, and I could literally FEEL their dagger eyes boring a hole into the back of my head sometimes! They could sense it, pure & simple. Just like you are sensing the sexual tension between your guy and his nympho female friend. Is she attractive? Because lets be honest here...if the girl is pretty AND needs sex every day, it is highly unlikely that they are not already doing it sometimes...the fact that he feels the need to be texting her for hours while with you makes it even more obvious to me...if they were always just platonic friends, he would probably not be going to that length to console/placate her...JMO.
This is the most annoying thing, bar none. When girls think that they are entitled to cut you off or regulate your time with female friends, despite the fact that you've known them longer and will know them for longer still. It's clingy, desperate, and self-conscious. No two ways about it. And there's no way on Earth I would ever put up with it.
I don't see how that fits into the picture at all. A woman with problems is a woman with problems, regardless of when or where sex happens. Might as well have sex sooner, so the stink hits the fan sooner.
The OP is completely overreacting and being immature. A strong & confident woman doesn't immediately size all other women up as "the competition" or wait to see her guy with other girls in order to "see if she's hurt". Unfortunately there are too few strong & confident women in the world. So the OP's reaction is average.. kind of like the behavior on Family Guy is also average.. (meaning, immature and rather dumb)
The OP sounds like she won the lottery of boyfriends. If he has a lot of girlfriends then surprise! He must be good with relating to women! So why not enjoy that? Doesn't every woman want a man who is popular with women? (Yes.) So treat your time with him as a gift that you can share with each other!
so funny, I do feel like I hit the lottery of boyfriends . I know it's me who is too sensitive.
This is the most annoying thing, bar none. When girls think that they are entitled to cut you off or regulate your time with female friends, despite the fact that you've known them longer and will know them for longer still. It's clingy, desperate, and self-conscious. No two ways about it. And there's no way on Earth I would ever put up with it.
I certainly do not intend to or feel Im entitled to cut him off from anything. I care a lot about him and becasue I once had a lot of male friends I was cut off from, I would never do this or attempt to do this to him. I wouldn't want him to be totally reliant upon me for companionship. I have responsibilities like everyone else and I can't always be there. I am just a sensitive person. thank-you for all responses.
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