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Why does someone have to be "in charge"? Can't both people mutually decide to go the same way?
Because that's the whole bad game, the quest for "equality", so two people are locked in a power struggle. It never works, because there is always the idea that you have to win by trying to maintain your side of everything.
So if women want to be controlled so much, why are they always crying out for equality in relationships???????????????????????????????????? If they like Alpha males, why do they want men to do the dishes and help out raising the kids???????????????????? You cannot have it both ways.
It's the dominant vs. submissive thing. Not necessarily submissive in daily life, but in a relationship. Only those who are like this understand. The others think this means someone getting abused, but it's not. Not at all.
Exactly. Alpha doesn't equate to bad boy, BTW. Though bad boys tend toward Alpha. Back to the quote. This is why alot of relationships don't work today. B/C everybody want's to be chief, and no one wants to be the indian.
I'm going to expound this out to all relationships and then bring this back to romantic. If you take an clique of friends, their is a leader. In the work place, there are appointed leaders. In nature, there are leaders. We even use the terms "pecking order", and "Head of the Pack". There is no equality in any harmonic relationship anywhere, the very concept is a fallacy. Do you know what equality and/or the search for equilibrium is? Competition. My clique vs your clique. My company vs your company. My pack vs. your pack. Me vs. you. So many relationships fail b/c both want to be boss, turning the home into a battleground.
So if women want to be controlled so much, why are they always crying out for equality in relationships???????????????????????????????????? If they like Alpha males, why do they want men to do the dishes and help out raising the kids???????????????????? You cannot have it both ways.
Read nebulous1's first post in this topic.
My bf is certainly an "Alpha male", yet he has dinner waiting for me every Friday evening when I get to his place after working all day. Being an "Alpha" and being sensitive to the needs and desires of your partner are not mutually exclusive. Not at all.
Of course, not all Alpha males are "bad boys", but that's hard for many people to understand.
Ya, it's been beaten to death, about 100 times over.
In the context of being 'alpha' this has no bearing, how many guys are led around? The definition of alpha male in this case and most is not being as overall outgoing, charismatic, and overtly oosing perceived sexuality.
I see it just like much of anything else you might see, the squeaky wheel is the one that gets the most attention. This doesn't lend itself to being the sharpest tool in either sexes case, as your rewarded further on the whole for being self-serving, self-centered, oblivious to others feelings, or otherwise ignorant of the general world around you. Sadly, all of these traits give you far better exposure overall to potential mates. Seems a bit contradictory to Darwinism in the long-run, but it's the reality of it.
Why is it contradictory to Darwinism? Darwinism doesn't define what's good or bad for society.
MISIGAS - No not all Alpha males are bad boys...But they have a tendency to be not as good a beta males. Why are women like you not attracted to beta males? Your BF may be a good guy, but there is a higher risk that he is not. That is my point.
MAC - You say that everyone wants to be chief and not the indian...A man who is content with being the indian is not desired.
MAC - You say that everyone wants to be chief and not the indian...A man who is content with being the indian is not desired.
there are women who like to control their man directly, they are just fewer and farther between.
Maybe it's b/c of my environment, but I think it's unnatural for someone to not be an alpha male, to me the term is almost redundant. U can take the geekiest, unconfident dude w/ girls in the world, but there will still be some kind of competitive edge/desire in him. wethr it be for his video games or Mac or whatever.
So if women want to be controlled so much, why are they always crying out for equality in relationships???????????????????????????????????? If they like Alpha males, why do they want men to do the dishes and help out raising the kids???????????????????? You cannot have it both ways.
lol you are right,i cant figure it out either.
you cant have your cake and eat it to.
Although i feel every man should help with rasing their children in everyway.
i dont think a SAHM/wife should ask her husband to help with in the house like cleaning/cooking/laundry if he is out working hard everyday for his family.
i still dont understand how some women whine they cant keep up the house hold stuff because they are chasing their 2 year old all day.
i still had dinner/house/and myself and kids cleaned up when my DH walked in the door 9 hours later after a hard days work.
and i watched other kids as well,i always had at least 4 kids everyday under the age of 5.
if everything cant get done in one day,theres always tomorrow.
also the husband still has house repair and yarkwork besides his full time job.
But if the woman is out working full time to,the husband should help with 50% of everything or they should make a list on who does what.
Not sure of the "exact" definition the OP is using for "alpha males", but I can tell you that my first husband was the sweet, sensitive, overly emotional kind and it only lasted two years. Why? I wanted to feel protected by my husband. As it was, if someone were to hit on me at a bar, I would have to be the one to tell him to lay off while my husband sat cowering in the corner. My second husband, going on 12 years together, is still sensitive to my needs and our family comes first, but he is more of an "alpha male". And, I love it. But, I also have no problem being in a more traditional, submissive wife role.
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