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Old 05-01-2010, 07:25 PM
 
2,093 posts, read 4,696,385 times
Reputation: 1121

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Quote:
Originally Posted by katie73 View Post
Some people can be so damn judgmental of others, they tend get blind sighted and miss out a lucky find.

I wouldn't mind at all, as it could be for all kind of reasons:
-Gets along great with his mom: I love family minded people.
-Wants to save: Thinking long term.
-Is going back to uni/college: wants to improve his life.

In fact, after 16 years of living on my own. I want to go back to uni and will be living with my mom for 2 years. I am looking forward to it
Congrats on going back to the university. I know there are a lot of older folks, including professionals, that are going back to finish their degree.
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Old 05-01-2010, 07:27 PM
 
2,093 posts, read 4,696,385 times
Reputation: 1121
Quote:
Originally Posted by Artsywoman View Post
I dated a nut that lived with his mother and he is still guess what? Living with his mother. He is a nut and he lives in the basement and is 60! He is a drunk nut! He turned out to be a three time felon and and a perverted liar. God knows what else he did. He was also caught with drugs. It was definitely a dysfunctional situation. He was always complaining about his mother kicking him out and cussing him out. At first I thought he was there to take care of her as she was elderly. After awhile it turned out to be too weird. Long story, but there is a problem with someone over age 20 living at home unless he is very ill or the parent is ill. period!
Yet another sweeping generalization....
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Old 05-01-2010, 07:34 PM
 
3,588 posts, read 5,726,959 times
Reputation: 4791
It's not that I would judge a man who lives with his parents, but it is somewhat outside the norm, and if I plan to get seriously or exclusively involved with him, it would be most helpful to exercise discernment in that matter. But it is no different for him towards me. There may be something he notices about me that he considers a "red flag" Who am I to call him "judgemental" because he is looking out for his best interests? Dating is a chance to get to know people, hopefully find one you can have deep and lasting relationship with. It's not unpaid social work.If a woman goes around allowing men access to her life before she determines whether they are appropriate and safe for her, chanting the "Judge not" mantra, she willingly chooses to be blind to reality. We don't have fathers, uncles, older brothers or community members to look out for us anymore. We also no longer have the luxury of the men we are involved with looking out for our best interests. We have to do it ourselves
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Old 05-02-2010, 08:41 AM
 
26,142 posts, read 31,178,163 times
Reputation: 27237
I did - HUGE, GRAND mistake. He was 50 and what was suppose to be temporary after a divorce became permanent and not only did he live with her he lived off her and it was revealed he'd always lived with her. Needless to say, he skated out of things like returning phone calls because of Mama and other issues. It was a royal pain in the rear end. He used her as an excuse for EVERYTHING.

I can't say all men would be like this but my own experience was awful.
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Old 05-03-2010, 02:20 AM
 
25,080 posts, read 16,324,103 times
Reputation: 41803
I would totally date a man who lived with his mother. I don't see anything wrong with it on the face.
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Old 05-03-2010, 04:40 AM
 
Location: Ohio
751 posts, read 1,673,397 times
Reputation: 668
I met the guy I'm with almost 5 yrs ago who now resides with his mother. He does have his own income so his mother isn't supporting him.He does help his mother quite abit.

I don't have my mother anymore cause I lost her to a brain tumor so I DO know all to well how important his mother is to him.
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Old 05-03-2010, 04:50 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 2,681,526 times
Reputation: 2157
The girl is being judged too harshly. She did, in fact, go out with him and give him a chance after which time she determined that they were not a good match. That is her right. That's what dating is all about.

The excuse she gave may have been only one determining factor. She really doesn't owe anyone an explanation. There obviously wasn't an attraction on her end. They don't share common values, goals, or lifestyle. He wasn't her Mr. Right. How does that make her a bad person?
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Old 05-03-2010, 05:28 AM
 
Location: Tha 6th Bourough
3,633 posts, read 5,787,034 times
Reputation: 1765
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beautifulbrwnbabydoll View Post
I have been trying to set my good friend up with a guy that I know. He is a really nice guy, He is good looking with a terrific body, he does not have children, he does not do drugs, and he has a job and college experience. The only thing is that right now he lives with his mom. He moved in with his mom to save some money and he is working towards moving out.

So I told her all of this, and she said it was o.k. for him to call her, and he called her the day before yesterday. When I talked to her about him today, I asked her was she going to call him back, and she said she was, but I could tell in her voice that she really didn't want to. To make a long story short, I asked her why she didn't want to call him, and she said that it's cause he lives with his mom...and basically he is beneath her.

I was really upset with her about this, and i wonder how many women think like this! If it were me and I saw that they guy had goals and was working toward something I would give him a shot. She won't even give the guy the time of day based on one temporary situation. IMO, it's a shame and I am starting to feel sorry for some of the guys out here that can't even get a chance to be with someone unless they are totally perfect. She is a total B#$%h!!

Well..this is funny because I sound like that guy...I'm nice, good looking, in college (almost done..in between jobs, and really funny and sweet to be around...but I live with my mother because I also have a temporary situation that forced me to move back home for now with mom.

I would say that your friend isn't too smart in this situation. She will get what she is looking for one day, and will regret it too. You seem like a nice person though, and I agree with the way you think about your friend.
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Old 05-03-2010, 05:30 AM
 
Location: Tha 6th Bourough
3,633 posts, read 5,787,034 times
Reputation: 1765
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cherie Tebo View Post
I met the guy I'm with almost 5 yrs ago who now resides with his mother. He does have his own income so his mother isn't supporting him.He does help his mother quite abit.

I don't have my mother anymore cause I lost her to a brain tumor so I DO know all to well how important his mother is to him.

Sorry for your loss...You're right about your boyfriend's mother too....The reason a lot of people look down on it might be because they don't value their parent like your boyfriend does and I do with my mom...different strokes for different folks I guess.
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Old 05-03-2010, 05:34 AM
 
Location: Tha 6th Bourough
3,633 posts, read 5,787,034 times
Reputation: 1765
Quote:
Originally Posted by laorbust61 View Post
It's not that I would judge a man who lives with his parents, but it is somewhat outside the norm,

In America it is...in Brazil it's not and other places it's the norm to live with your family until you actually marry...We are used to this whole making it on our own thing, but as the economy has turned bad I personally have met more people who have to live back at home now. Are we bad people?...Well I guess that depends what social class you're coming from
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