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Bah. If anything I'd consider it more of a apothecary's crucible.
If your SO's drunk, they still just want to be around/with you, you've got something. Alcohol does NOT make you do anything you're not thinking about doing anyhow. It removes part of the inhibitions from doing it under normal circumstances. That's it.
It's no more evil or uncontrollable than the person drinking it.
While I agree with you , in principal, lets examine that 'inhibitions' thing. Inhibitions are a safety net. While it is true that you may be THINKING about something, there is that line between thought and action that is there for a reason. It equates to bringing a fantasy into the realm of the real, and thats not always a good thing. Getting blotto drunk and stumbing all over puking on everyone around you's shoes, making out with the first handy warm body and not remembering anything about it does not lead me to believe that blotto person is in control in any way. I have nothing against a social cocktail or even a good buzz, but there is a stopping point. If the booze is controlling you rather than the reverse (as is the case all to often on the 'party' scene) a person should find that stopping point before it goes over that line. Hopefully before ones drunken actions have dropped a nuke on ones life. US society is not like the Japanese, the latter which forgives all actions while one is inebriated. A drunken act of stupidity can cause a lot of grief. It can be a hard horse to ride.
I have to laugh at some of these responses, and wonder what the view would be if the genders were reversed:
BF & GF go out to a bar with a group of the GF's friends. BF gets completely wasted and starts hitting on GF's friends. GF gets mad and leaves in a huff. BF continues to drink and eventually makes out with one of GF's friends. He wakes up the next morning having blacked out and not remembering his actions.
GF breaks off the relationship and wants nothing whatsoever to do with the BF (although she herself got drunk a couple of times and calls BF in the middle of the night.) When sober the next day, she states that this means nothing and adamently tells now former BF that it is over.
The guy now comes here to seek advice.
I seriously doubt that we'd have many sympathetic posts telling him that the GF he humiliated in the bar was an untrustworthy loser and he should be greatful that the relationship is over.
I think the responses would have been along the lines of:
"Dude, I can't believe you did that to your girlfriend!"
or
"You're nothing but a drunk horndog who doesn't respect women!"
or
"You're lucky your GF just walked out of the bar. If I was your GF, I would have busted a cap in your ass."
etc. etc. etc.
FWIW, my answer would be the same regardless of gender. I'm up for busting a cap in anybody's ass who needs a cap busted in their ass!
While I agree with you , in principal, lets examine that 'inhibitions' thing. Inhibitions are a safety net. While it is true that you may be THINKING about something, there is that line between thought and action that is there for a reason. It equates to bringing a fantasy into the realm of the real, and thats not always a good thing. Getting blotto drunk and stumbing all over puking on everyone around you's shoes, making out with the first handy warm body and not remembering anything about it does not lead me to believe that blotto person is in control in any way. I have nothing against a social cocktail or even a good buzz, but there is a stopping point. If the booze is controlling you rather than the reverse (as is the case all to often on the 'party' scene) a person should find that stopping point before it goes over that line. Hopefully before ones drunken actions have dropped a nuke on ones life. US society is not like the Japanese, the latter which forgives all actions while one is inebriated. A drunken act of stupidity can cause a lot of grief. It can be a hard horse to ride.
I don't know about you, but I have to wonder about the person making out with the person who just puked. I mean, isn't it kind of gross to be sticking your tongue down the throat of a person who just got done puking? GROSS!!!!!
I agree that it's my fault that I got so drunk that I blacked out and it was something I normally wouldn't do. I've thought about if I'd want to be with a guy that leaves me at the bar and isn't there for me when I'm drunk, and later sick, and the truth is that I wouldn't normally, but I know he's not like that just as I know I'm not that drunk girl I was that night. Although it would be nice to at least hear him recognize that he did something wrong!
The truth is is that I miss him and what we had before Friday night. We're both good people and perhaps this is just an unfortunate outcome of us both being irresponsible and letting loose too much too soon. I really wish we could both just forget that night and move on! But I suppose that's just wishful thinking
Why would you want to keep a guy that was so willing to believe the worst about you and leave you in a very dangerous situation?
A guy who really cares about you and knows you even a little bit would know it was not in your character to behave the way you did and would realize something was very wrong. You were most likely slipped something in your drink and are lucky you weren't ganged raped or something. He should have NEVER left you at the bar, shame on him. And I hope you've learned a lesson about watching your drinks in the future - never let the bottle or glass leave your hand to dance or go to the bathroom.
and storming off without making sure you were taken care of. I would think long and hard about even wanting to get back with someone who treated you this way.
When I dated, all this was many years ago, when I picked the lady up I felt responsible for her well being and safety making it my duty to get her home safely.
I remember one date where the girl spotted a guy she used to date, he spotted her, they wanted to get together again which made it a difficult situation for me.
I insisted on take her home and walking her to her door. I actually did this with her used to be boyfriend drunkenly following behind. No kiss on the porch, not that I wanted one because I was so disgusted by her behavior by this time, she just turned to her boyfriends car, got in and drove off.
That said I did my duty, she did get home safely and at least I wouldn't have felt personally responsible had she been hurt in her drunken boyfriends car.
Dump the jerk and vow now to never drink more than one drink again.
I don't know about you, but I have to wonder about the person making out with the person who just puked. I mean, isn't it kind of gross to be sticking your tongue down the throat of a person who just got done puking? GROSS!!!!!
LMAO. Yep. I guess some types see an opportunity in a drunken girl/guy whatever that they would not have under normal conditions. Personally I wouldn't make out with the hottest super model on Earth if she was in such a condition, even if she was all over me like white on rice. Tasting someones regurgitated over indulgence ain't my thing either.
I don't know about you, but I have to wonder about the person making out with the person who just puked. I mean, isn't it kind of gross to be sticking your tongue down the throat of a person who just got done puking? GROSS!!!!!
That's exactly what I was thinking. UGH!
These two need to call it a day, and move on. They both screwed up, and have much to learn.
Give it some time. Stay in contact with him. He may get over it in time (meaning as much as a year) or he may not. If he is worth it, then the time is worth it. Meanwhile join AA and later you can invite him to one of your meetings.
I'm a classic over-analyzer so please excuse my long post! Thanks for any advice/help
Yup, no problem. When you grow up there is a word to look up in the dictionary called "consequences".
If you get smashed drunk and then get violated, abandoned in a bar, pregnant or it costs you a relationship then I can't feel sorry for you at all. It's the consequences of acting like that.
To me I don't know how you can celebrate a graduation passed out in vomit and getting violated 10 different ways by guys you don't know. But hey maybe I missed something.
Stop hanging out with drunk losers and dating them or whatever else you are doing with them.
Purdy simple.
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I thought that same thing, but didn`t say anything. 
