Interesting: communication 180 flip

[blazejen]

Originally Posted by rubber_factory

I agree.

It seems to me that the real issue here, is whether the O.P. wants to try and help him manage his problem, or if she should cut her losses and leave.

Yea - I just think the issue *used to be* his addiction to WoW. Now it is that + he doesn't care to communicate. I figure if he doesn't care to communicate, he doesn't care.

I have wondered if we have just had too many fights and he figures the solution to that is to not talk. LOL I think I keep trying to convince myself he *does* care, but...

In reality, it doesn't matter if he does or not because the effect is the same.

Sad.

[DennyCrane]

Originally Posted by blazejen

I've posted about this relationship I'm in a few times before. I live with my bf/pseudo-fiance and we have lived together for 2 years. We've had issues, for sure, and we have tried to break up numerous times, but every time we talk through it. He has always talked and talked and talked ad nauseum. Until about 1 month ago, he was extremely sensitive (more so than me - and I am dam* sensitive!) and always addressed my feelings if I told him about them. He said he felt that whenever we have an issue we should tell each other about it.

Fast forward to last 3 times I've shared an issue. In the past month, he has just said "hmph." and ignored it. Very weird. Mainly a weird contrast. So strange I wonder if he talked to one of his hyper-masculine friends about how to end arguments in a relationship and was given the advice, "Say nothing."

Example1:
Me: "It's really bothering me that you play WoW all evening and all weekend. We used to do things together outside, etc. And now that game seems to have become what I ussed to be to you. I think I'm getting jealous..."
Him: "Hmph." *returns to playing his game*

Ex2:
Me: "It really bothers me that you encourgaed your mother in disparaging my educational endeavour."
Him: "Hmph. What am I supposed to say? I agree with her."

Ex3: (last Friday when he started to talk to me while he was playing Wow and I was talking to him about something and realized he wasn't responding and I said, "Mike?" and he snapped at me and said "WHAT!")
Him (30 mins later): "What's wrong?"
Me: "I'm still a little annoyed that you snapped at me. I feel that you were treating me like that kid next door that gets on your nerves."
Him: "You were acting like him."
Me: "Well, I don't think there's any reason to snap at me."
Him: *storms off and downstairs*

Me: *30 minutes later* "Why do you keep ignoring me when I tell you how I feel about something? Why can't you just apologize for snapping and tell me you'll try not to do it anymore?"
Him: "What I'm supposed to chase you around the house begging for your forgiveness?"

Anyway, I don't know what's up. Maybe he just feels that eventually I'll break up with him and leave...

It's just strange - because he has *always* in the 2.5 years we've been together, been The Communicator. It hasn't always been constructive - in fact he's lousy and always pulls out these absurd absolutes (e.g., "You always _____" when I don't) but he's always been willing to talk.

Now he just plays the stupid game night and day every moment when he's not working. And doing anything else is a huge inconvenience because it will interfere with his WoW time. Just weird.

Sounds like you're dating a child. Dump him.