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Hrm. I will offer to pay - and if the man insists that I do not (which 99% insist that I do not)- I offer to leave the tip. Again, on tip, men typically will not allow me to - unless I insist a second time - and then by then, they MIGHT give in because they know it will make me feel happy and helpful/useful. Also, I have paid for 2nd or 3rd dates on my own because I was very grateful for the first date and the generosity/effort that the man put into it. It makes me feel great to treat someone. Who cares about the money. . .seeing someone smile and feel good is PRICELESS.
You've said so much that really identifies who and what type of woman you truly are. If he pays for the first date, then you feel "obligated" to pay for the 2nd or 3rd just shows that you don't look at Men equally. A Real Man or Woman wouldn't feel obligated to "pay", they would do so out of mutual consideration for each other not obligation.
So the whole point of the date is just to make you happy? So they'll give a tip for that? you must deal with some real spineless men. Give a tip because you know the waiter is only making $3.00 an hour in most cases and has to survive off of that wage. Thats looking out for your fellow man ensuring that we all customers/consumers have a pleasant and enjoyable experience, Its not all about you sweetheart.
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I date men who are on average between 45-60 y/o, who I believe have a different style of dating (more chivalrous and traditional) than men who are younger. I do NOT get any of the men who are around my age and younger who are so damn nit-picky and jaded with all their rules, guidelines and blah-blah's. Who needs that complication and drama. . .I do not. I'm into men who are a bit more emotionally mature and financially secure than that.
lol
So are you financially secure by your own merits? or because of your sugar daddies wallets?
Whenever a woman says she likes a man thats chivalrous and traditional is just code in saying thats she wants a man without balls that she can walk over. Someone who is at the mercy of her whims, but more so it says that she doesn't value EQUAL partnerships between males and females. If anything the men around your age see you for what you are and don't want to deal with the drama. For one thing is also shows that they're making mature life choices by not dealing with a high risk, drama ladden women such as yourself.
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If a man is whining and whimpering about women looking for a meal ticket, then change the type of women you date. *light bulb* It's just that simple. Raise the bar a little or continue to bask in that victim mentality. Don't blame a woman that YOU chose to ask out. If you go in half-a$$ed - guess what! - You will get half-a$$ed. Have fun with that!
These do not sound like the words of a woman is who drama free lololol
lets get it straight, no one is basking in a victim mentality, the aim is just to help out Men make better choices. We live in an incredibly biased matriarchal society that will always be in your corner if your a woman. Its time that real men equal the playing field instead of behaving like Mangina's and whining about buying women drinks. Real men lead by example not serf based chivalry.
Ok I have to give a little leeway here. I understand your point. You are trying to court women and you don't want to wind up dry after only going on two dates. However, this is not a cost benefit analysis. Either you like the girl and are fairly certain she likes you back, or you don't and she doesn't. So why not just take out the girls that you feel you really have something with? And if you don't want to spend a lot of money, make a lunch and go to the park, or see a movie. Not a big deal.
And yes maybe men have it a little harder because they have to do all the courting, but guess what? Women have crap they have to deal with too. Men expect women to look pretty, so we spend all this time picking the right outfit, doing our hair, putting on makeup, etc. If we just showed up in our sweat pants and our hair in a bun, sans makeup, I'm not so sure you'd be spouting all this nonsense about indoctrination.
Save some money. Wear something nice. And pay for the meal. Simple as that.
Liz, thanks for an HONEST reply.
of course this can go both ways. I can understand where your coming from. In a secure and emotionally mature relationship both parties will be looking their best for one another. Even if she is wearing her hair in a bun without make up that doesn't make her any different. I know for one the woman that i'm emotionally invested in could be wearing sweats, a scarf and a t-shirt and she'll still be the most beautiful woman in my life.
When it comes down to it, its not about what she's rocking or whatever. It really comes down to who she is but even the sweetest most caring women is indoctrinated with these belief but the difference is that she's aware of it.
More code for being broke and cheap. Buying a woman a drink means they're "depending" on you, give me a break. Stick to the corner bodega, I'm sure you'll find a more suitable woman there.
We are certainly not living in the old times, where men were actually men. There are very few things more unattractive than a grown man who b*tches about the tab.
Whats worse is a grown woman making an under handed ethnic comment, now that really shows your true colors.
In the old times when men where men, (before they were truly neutered by feminists) they'd see your unattractiveness for what it was worth and steer clear.
But on a real note the bodega comment was unnecessary and uncalled for.
Whats worse is a grown woman making an under handed ethnic comment, now that really shows your true colors.
In the old times when men where men, (before they were truly neutered by feminists) they'd see your unattractiveness for what it was worth and steer clear.
But on a real note the bodega comment was unnecessary and uncalled for.
I felt is was necessary and called for and hardly underhanded. I meant every word. For your information, my color is brown. I also know that type that hangs out at the corner bodega so I have a basis to comment. Spare me the Al Sharpton imitation.
I find it hilarious how you think you know all about the last couple of people you quoted, what they're really about, what is an "honest" answer. You don't know squat. People like you make for great entertainment on these boards.
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