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You're discovering the difference of loving someone and being in love with someone.
It's amazing how everyone including the newspaper advice columnists keep throwing around this term of "being in love" like it means something. It doesn't mean anything at all because nobody bothers to define it.
So here we are, we have to define what "not being in love" entails.
Defining "being in love" is going to require a separate thread in itself.
When you feel numb or dead inside, and even if everything would be perfect from then on out, you still don't want to stay because you just don't have it in you.
I don't see a future with him..I feel we can't grow together..but I still love him..what should I do?
As difficult as it is, if you really don't see a future, you just have to accept that reality. It's *very* painful, but there really is no other choice. And it sounds like you already realize that.
As difficult as it is, if you really don't see a future, you just have to accept that reality. It's *very* painful, but there really is no other choice. And it sounds like you already realize that.
It really depends on how long the relationship has been going on. It seems the rules change incrementally as the relationship builds a history. In some respects a long term relationship can be more fragile because there is this expectation of love, where as in a new relationship like a six week fling or from my own experience after six months I may not be sure real love is there. IMO if you are in a relationship you should never feel alone, even if you are 100's or 1000 miles away from that person you shouldn't feel like you are by yourself when no one is around. When you stop taking a part of that person with you every where you go, I think its over.
sorry not really...this is my first time being in a relationship... it is all new to me...
Well, you can love many different people in life - your parents, your best friends, your siblings, your dog, your grandma - surely you know what that kind of love is like?
But being "in love" with someone is love on another level. There is an intimacy and connectedness you share with that other person that you don't feel for anyone else. Being in love with someone means you are able to see them for who they truly are and yet continue to accept them and care for them despite their failings and shortcomings. Being in love with someone challenges you to put aside your own ego and selfishness. Being in love with someone inspires you to be the best you that you can be, all the while knowing you are inspiring your partner in the same way, which is a very powerful thing
Location: Prescott Valley, Az (unfortunately still here)
2,543 posts, read 4,886,160 times
Reputation: 1521
You know it's over when:
1. When they avoid you and never call you again.
2. When they or you cheat.
3. When their personality or attitude changed strangely.
4. You don't do the things you used to do together anymore.
5. One of you start to work more than anything else (become a workaholic).
6. One of you wants to move, but the other one doesn't.
7. They or you don't find each other attractive anymore.
8. When other family members don't like them or don't like you.
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