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Old 08-03-2009, 09:08 PM
 
Location: home
180 posts, read 597,048 times
Reputation: 121

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Moderator cut: Removed per author's request

Last edited by Marka; 04-15-2010 at 08:11 AM..
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Old 08-03-2009, 09:13 PM
 
Location: lala land
1,581 posts, read 3,158,144 times
Reputation: 1083
Damn it Bailey, why'd you have to use my name
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Old 08-03-2009, 09:19 PM
 
Location: katrina country
161 posts, read 401,154 times
Reputation: 129
i feel sorry for any children these 2 will have....
either the woman is too scared to leave him or she doesnt 'know' that real love isnt like that.or she is there for 'security' reasons, money or whatever.. bad situation and one that unfortunatly is becoming more and more prevalant.
as for her going to jail- the police hate, hate .hate to mess
with domestic violence cases
and the woman usually will always get protected.
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Old 08-03-2009, 09:48 PM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
16,078 posts, read 26,989,650 times
Reputation: 18144
If this is actually a true story, there something you've left out,
Sorry, the story doesnt add up.

Last edited by Marka; 04-15-2010 at 08:13 AM..
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Old 08-03-2009, 09:59 PM
 
Location: home
180 posts, read 597,048 times
Reputation: 121
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode View Post
If this is actually a true story, there something you've left out,
Sorry, the story doesnt add up.


The whole story is too much to type lol been going on for about 3 years. There is also a court order preventing the boyfriend from being around "Liz's" 3 kids two of them are the boyfriends. The boyfriend does not drive and she goes and gets him and brings him to her mothers apt where she lives and she also instigates a lot of the fights. Not that I think violence is alright but I do think that it is only fair that she is locked up too because they are both violating the order.
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Old 08-03-2009, 10:40 PM
 
1,322 posts, read 2,308,129 times
Reputation: 1472
I agree, and in some states that I've lived in that has been the case. In Florida, I remember a couple that lived next door getting into a real bad fight - throwing things, screaming, yelling, and yes.. he hit her and she hit him - I called the cops and by the time they arrived both people were a little bloody. It really surprised me, they both went to jail for the night.

I don't think that it's right that only one person goes if both people are involved. Depends on the scenario though, but in what you describe, I completely agree.

Last edited by Marka; 04-15-2010 at 08:13 AM..
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Old 08-03-2009, 11:01 PM
 
Location: in my mind
2,743 posts, read 13,858,623 times
Reputation: 1624
He should get his own order of protection... but that will probably never happen if it's left up to him, I'm guessing. I imagine many guys would see that as a sign of weakness....?

I thought the "rule" was that if there were signs of violence (i.e. marks) on BOTH people then both would go to jail, assuming the signs weren't from self-defence.... but then again I have been around situations like this where none of the rules/laws were followed by the police. In fact, with a friend I had, it was the opposite: her boyfriend was friends with all the cops in town (small town), and had family on the force, so they didn't even enforce her protection order, or even arrest him when they WITNESSED him drag her by her hair out of the apartment and into the street! They just told him to chill and "take a walk"!

SO, yeah, these things are never handled fairly. Sad.
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Old 08-03-2009, 11:11 PM
 
Location: 39 20' 59"N / 75 30' 53"W
16,078 posts, read 26,989,650 times
Reputation: 18144
Quote:
Originally Posted by bailey19782000 View Post
The whole story is too much to type lol been going on for about 3 years. There is also a court order preventing the boyfriend from being around "Liz's" 3 kids two of them are the boyfriends. The boyfriend does not drive and she goes and gets him and brings him to her mothers apt where she lives and she also instigates a lot of the fights. Not that I think violence is alright but I do think that it is only fair that she is locked up too because they are both violating the order.

If she violated an order [which she brought about to start with ] then invited him over ,
they argued, she blackened his eye and he went to jail,
she should have gone to jail as well, then some mandatory domestic violence classes.
These two could go on and on for years, until one of them moves on or one gets hurt badly,
yeah its a shame.

Last edited by virgode; 08-03-2009 at 11:12 PM.. Reason: pghing
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Old 08-04-2009, 12:40 AM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,607 posts, read 39,270,058 times
Reputation: 13426
There's your answer, right there.

Last edited by Marka; 04-15-2010 at 08:14 AM..
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Old 08-04-2009, 01:01 AM
 
15,550 posts, read 13,045,870 times
Reputation: 10619
If she blackened his eyes and then he went to jail, its because the protection order is given by a judge. Once a judge says it is so, then everyone complys (cops). The fact that she had obviously abused him , means nothing because for all the cops know, she was defending herself from a man who had previously physically abused her and who has an order from a judge to stay away from her. She could of easily said it was self-defense and the guy would immediately go to jail.

The way I see it, the guy doesnt care about any protection orders and will continue seeing this woman. The woman will continue to abuse him and put him behind bars, and as long as the guy doesnt get tired of the situation, this will continue. I say leave it alone. Obviously the guy knows what he is getting himself into. No need for intermediaries. Besides, she has 2 kids with him and he probably wants to see the kids as well.

Next time, tell the guy not to call the cops on Liz, cus he already knows what will happen. P.S. I'm not trying to be insensitive, but I know a couple just like the one you described. She has full custody of the kids cus he is a drunk and she is always telling him he has to take the kids cus she's not going to take care of all 3 herself. In fact, for her, having custody of the kids is just a minor detail. She doesn't actually want to take care of the kids. So she lets him keep them all the time cus she doesn't want to be bothered with so much work.
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