Single women outnumbering single men in the eastern cities & single men outnumbering single women in the western cities (young, friends)
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Someone pointed out they were a 5 in Nyc but a 10 in San Fran.
I totally understand this.
But for me,its reversed.
But then...whenever I go out in Nyc,I get tons of attention. Here in Nj,0.
Wore the same dress,one in a club in Nyc,and the other time in Jersey.
got plenty of attention and whistles in Nyc,Jersey 0.
My sister is the opposite.
In Viirginia,I got lots of attention. In Nc,0.
Its funny the way location someone's desirability.
I kind of agree. NYC area women can not compete with southern and West coast women when it comes to looks and personality, I'm not sure about brains. Also Midwestern women are also not that hot either. In NYC guys will screw anything, even more worse if the guy is married or in a relationship, he will see other women or string other women along, womem also do this by friend zoning men here. One thing is I met plenty of out of town women as of recently, some come to NYC to make fortunes, some to live out their dreams and some move here to find love, things they could not find and attain back in their native cities and states. Over the years, thanks to gentrification I personally find out of town women more attractive than local NYC women not only in beauty in the face, but also in personality and in brains.
Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 05-06-2013 at 03:18 PM..
We need to leverage our looks for attention and good treatment, but we have very few playing cards here. Some (hetero male) blogger out there told me, there are only 2 options to have any leverage here are:
1. Move out of NYC or
2. Use personality!
Susan, demographics play a huge role in your dating options. I agree, and have seen it first hand having lived in several different states. But your point above is really true no matter where a single woman lives.
The vast majority of men are pursuing a very small minority of women. That is why strippers, centerfolds, and playmates exist. Most single men, and a large percentage of married men, crave physical beauty (and variety) to an extent that most women cannot even comprehend. So you have a very basic problem that demographics will never fix. Trust me.
But demographics still helps You desparately need to move to Phoenix AZ. A woman who is in halfway decent shape, with a nice face, has 2 or 3 guys she dates, and dozens more at her beckon call. It is NYC in reverse. Finding a keeper is still as hard as it is anywhere, since most of them will bang a stripper in a heartbeat given the chance, but at least you'll have 10x the options you had in New York.
The gender disaparity exists and it' very real; it's often noted, just as there are sayings about Man Jose or SF. SATC was not coincidentally about women. The typically female industries are based HERE not Man Jose. How often do you run into models down in wherever in the MIDWEST you are from? NEVER right? Never. Everyone I know is friends with a few. You see at least a 9 or 10/models every 10 feet in Soho. Jesus. It's SO not even - let's say that hypothetically you are right, and the revisited map is correct- for arguments sake- well then my options are still mostly, lowest socioeconomic class non-white men while I must compete with models. Comeon now, either way it is NOT what you are used to. I am not arguing over this anymore, but you clearly need to get a grip on how things are and respect women's experiences and feelings. You should have seen the kind of attention I got in San Francisco, and Illinois, from men who would be dating/marrying models easy as pie here. There is nothing more extreme than this gender divide, and no environment more difficult for women than NYC.
I have no reason to 'read your post carefully', clearly you assume all women should hang on your every word, as you mentioned this to me earlier.
In NYC its a two way highway when it comes to dating and relationships.
Quote:
Originally Posted by susangggg
omg, thanks SO much for it. I'm gonna SO facebook it and share it with my friend who's moving with me. Kinda like 'Men in Trees' huh? Zany NYC writer/romance coach chick gets cheated on by her dbag fiance and moves to Alaska where it's these gruff, masculine bearded types everywhere. She still acts like a dits though and lets the guy she likes have all the control, plus she doesnt even bother playing the field, so it's not that easy for her (Anne Heche is so retarded)- but it is for her friends, especially the cute redheaded chick who's been looking in NYC for like years and falls in love with a nice boyfriend in like 2 months. (great premise, terrible show lol.)
It also reminds me of the article in frisky.com where this NYC writer chick(who *mentions* Men in Trees no less ) moves to Missouri, and says she's "fat and average" in NYC, but in Missouri, she's hot. Lol. She suddenly gets alot of attention and gets asked out the first week of moving there.
I've also recently read an article by a woman from NYC who went to SF and stated she'd go out and see women who couldn't get attention at a dive bar in New York, being followed around by 2 or 3 decent men like they were puppy dogs...she was never so amazed at anything in her life. And this woman was a model with an engineering degree.
We need to leverage our looks for attention and good treatment, but we have very few playing cards here. Some (hetero male) blogger out there told me, there are only 2 options to have any leverage here are:
1. Move out of NYC or
2. Use personality!
(The trouble with 2 is that there are ALSO many personality-super women around TOO!!! Plus, it will only hold so long because a man will eventually cheat on you easily when he gets bored, or make you feel bad about not being perfect and talk about other women. Plus, it's just plain *disgusting* to see below-average men with women *way* out of their league constantly, and see all the women here terribly worried about being cheated on. I REFUSE the entire paradigm.)
The problem is that, if you're hot in NYC, there are also 10 other chicks on Broadway walking alongside you who are hot too, so there's not alot of value you have to the men here; they move on quite quickly and usually play the field with several women at once, while we don't find anywhere *near* the same amount of desirable guys. It's awful but at least I don't hate men anymore, because I realize it's just NYC men.
Just you wait and see, Dennycrane, just you wait and see!!!!
I'm going to be real with you. There are pros and cons to dating in NYC for both genders. For men there are much more women to go around and even better if a man is good looking and or have money he can have his pick with any women here in NYC. Women in NYC like they way a man dresses, his physique before women ever judges a mans internal character. But still he will change I know it! Also if a man is lucky enough he can string along more women and the sad thing is the more women he gets the more women that will follow him because he is desirable. On the flipside for men, if a man is average or below average on NYC standards like lacking an apt, car, sex appeal, 4 year degree he is going to have a tough time getting women for both long term and short term relationships. Guys who struggle in NYC either settle for either less attractive women, or a women with some significant amount of baggage like children, medical or financial problem and will stick with these type of women for sometime, or move out of the region where there dating prospects will prosper like the south or west coast. Another thing about NYC is that a man can not be a niceguy, if a man is a niceguy women will walk over you for whatever reason.
For women whats great about NYC is that much of the job market caters to them from domestic work to being an assistant or an intern at a fortune 500 company. This is one of the main reasons why NYC has so much women because of its job market. The next step is finding a man. Women in NYC are very picky, probably the pickiest of all women in the country. Not only that but the previous generation told children that you expect the best and nothing less type of ideas from helicopter parents, now it has come to play in the dating world as children most notably women as they got older. Women here in NYC tend to go for a man that is educated, attractive or has money, or for some locals a man with a car who can take them shopping upstate! For most women its all about a mans status. Personality is one of the last few things women look at when it comes to a man here, but that attitude changes when the damage has been done. Women here can get a man and get lots of lots of sex, why do you think there is so much single moms in this city. Problem is when women has a man that man will probably string along and or see other women, or that man might keep a woman as a side piece for sometime. Also women here friend zone to many good men. Also relationships don't last long here in NYC, everyone is always looking for better and its real sad when children become involved because of parents who only care about themselves.
As for you moving out to NYC as a woman, good luck with that and I hope you did. I know of a couple of women who had no problems meeting men here in NYC but once they moved down south or out west they ran into roadblocks and could not land a man. A woman who is 10 in NYC might be a 5 in Las Vegas or a 6 in Atlanta, or a 4 in LA. On the flipside men who struggled in NYC don't struggle often when they step outside of the city. But I can say that I know of a couple of women who struggle here but moved out of the city and found relationships.
I kind of agree. NYC area women can not compete with southern and West coast women when it comes to looks and personality, I'm not sure about brains. Also Midwestern women are also not that hot either. In NYC guys will screw anything, even more worse if the guy is married or in a relationship, he will see other women or string other women along, womem also do this by friend zoning men here. One thing is I met plenty of out of town women as of recently, some come to NYC to make fortunes, some to live out their dreams and some move here to find love, things they could not find and attain back in their native cities and states. Over the years, thanks to gentrification I personally find out of town women more attractive than local NYC women not only in beauty in the face, but also in personality and in brains.
I'm going to be real with you. There are pros and cons to dating in NYC for both genders. For men there are much more women to go around and even better if a man is good looking and or have money he can have his pick with any women here in NYC. Women in NYC like they way a man dresses, his physique before women ever judges a mans internal character. But still he will change I know it! Also if a man is lucky enough he can string along more women and the sad thing is the more women he gets the more women that will follow him because he is desirable. On the flipside for men, if a man is average or below average on NYC standards like lacking an apt, car, sex appeal, 4 year degree he is going to have a tough time getting women for both long term and short term relationships. Guys who struggle in NYC either settle for either less attractive women, or a women with some significant amount of baggage like children, medical or financial problem and will stick with these type of women for sometime, or move out of the region where there dating prospects will prosper like the south or west coast. Another thing about NYC is that a man can not be a niceguy, if a man is a niceguy women will walk over you for whatever reason.
For women whats great about NYC is that much of the job market caters to them from domestic work to being an assistant or an intern at a fortune 500 company. This is one of the main reasons why NYC has so much women because of its job market. The next step is finding a man. Women in NYC are very picky, probably the pickiest of all women in the country. Not only that but the previous generation told children that you expect the best and nothing less type of ideas from helicopter parents, now it has come to play in the dating world as children most notably women as they got older. Women here in NYC tend to go for a man that is educated, attractive or has money, or for some locals a man with a car who can take them shopping upstate! For most women its all about a mans status. Personality is one of the last few things women look at when it comes to a man here, but that attitude changes when the damage has been done. Women here can get a man and get lots of lots of sex, why do you think there is so much single moms in this city. Problem is when women has a man that man will probably string along and or see other women, or that man might keep a woman as a side piece for sometime. Also women here friend zone to many good men. Also relationships don't last long here in NYC, everyone is always looking for better and its real sad when children become involved because of parents who only care about themselves.
Susan, demographics play a huge role in your dating options. I agree, and have seen it first hand having lived in several different states. But your point above is really true no matter where a single woman lives.
The vast majority of men are pursuing a very small minority of women. That is why strippers, centerfolds, and playmates exist. Most single men, and a large percentage of married men, crave physical beauty (and variety) to an extent that most women cannot even comprehend. So you have a very basic problem that demographics will never fix. Trust me.
But demographics still helps You desparately need to move to Phoenix AZ. A woman who is in halfway decent shape, with a nice face, has 2 or 3 guys she dates, and dozens more at her beckon call. It is NYC in reverse. Finding a keeper is still as hard as it is anywhere, since most of them will bang a stripper in a heartbeat given the chance, but at least you'll have 10x the options you had in New York.
haha, I'm moving to Phx in August. I'll be newly single so I'll let ya'll know how it goes for me!
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) moves to Missouri, and says she's "fat and average" in NYC, but in Missouri, she's hot. Lol. She suddenly gets alot of attention and gets asked out the first week of moving there.
It's awful but at least I don't hate men anymore, because I realize it's just NYC men.
. Problem is when women has a man that man will probably string along and or see other women, or that man might keep a woman as a side piece for sometime. Also women here friend zone to many good men. Also relationships don't last long here in NYC, everyone is always looking for better and its real sad when children become involved because of parents who only care about themselves. 
