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Old 12-19-2014, 02:47 PM
 
Location: moved
11,480 posts, read 7,150,495 times
Reputation: 19215

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I've not noticed a coastal gender imbalance, but there does seem to be a town/city divide. Namely, the smaller cities, the towns and rural areas tend to have surfeit of single men. The larger cities, especially the "glamor cities" with lots of financial, medical, administrative, corporate HQ and public-sector jobs (Exhibit-A would be DC), tend to have more single women. This is especially true, I think, amongst the professionals and the upper-middle class. Everyone struggles to find such jobs in the smaller and less economically vibrant locales, but women are at particular disadvantage. Thus women are more likely to relocate to the larger and more prosperous cities. Men are more likely to remain in the towns of their birth, or to relocate to industrial cities which are more likely to offer jobs in their specialization. The latter is precisely what happened to me. I "grew up" (if such terminology is operative here) in the suburbs of East Coast cities, but relocated to the outlying area beyond a decaying smaller city of the Midwest.

Another consideration is the disparity between the overall number of singles (male or female), and those who are actively searching for a partner. As has been recently discussed in numerous threads on marriage and divorce, men who have recently exited long-term relationships are more likely to reengage in the search for a new partner, while women are more circumspect and are more content remaining alone. Thus whereas the raw number of single women might be larger than that of single men, if we downscope from just "single" to "single and looking", the ratio might reverse.
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Old 12-19-2014, 03:38 PM
 
Location: Vail, CO
957 posts, read 965,974 times
Reputation: 1107
I gotta admit, women are super friendly in the Northeast. Whenever I go to Montreal, NY or Nova Scotia women actually seem to make an effort to talk to you. It seems like there's always more women than men in the bars.

Women in Vail are all married or getting hit up by a bunch of thirsty dudes. It's worth the struggle though, I love it here. Denver is better but there's still way more single guys than women everywhere you go. It was tough but I found one.

I've lived in huge cites and I just fail to see the appeal. I'm not a social butterfly by any means though! A town of 30-60k a hour or two from the city is more my style.
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Old 12-19-2014, 03:44 PM
 
Location: In a place beyond human comprehension
8,602 posts, read 6,412,853 times
Reputation: 15385
I don't know how true this is...

But I am in the south east...single. I don't generally pay attention to those types of statistics or demographics like that anymore. My personality is vastly different than the people around me, so that is a huge contributing factor. Most of my classmates either now have kids or are engaged.

I honestly don't see the hurry but to each their own.
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Old 12-19-2014, 04:05 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
91,224 posts, read 88,140,905 times
Reputation: 98750
Actually, there are Western cities where women outnumber men. They're not the tech centers, though. WA state has quite a few.
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Old 12-19-2014, 04:23 PM
 
Location: Vail, CO
957 posts, read 965,974 times
Reputation: 1107
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Actually, there are Western cities where women outnumber men. They're not the tech centers, though. WA state has quite a few.
Way too many delusional hipsters out there. Haha.
I'm a pretty liberal, open minded person but Portland and Seattle you do seem to run into the types that could star in Portlandia quite a bit!

It's a nice place to visit though.

Last edited by MarshallV84; 12-19-2014 at 04:46 PM..
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Old 01-09-2015, 03:36 PM
 
4,380 posts, read 4,080,395 times
Reputation: 4420
I haven't read this entire thread. It popped up on the bottom of the screen as related/similar to something else I was reading.

I live in an area where more and more my girlfriends, including myself, are giving up. I have a friend who is hosting a speed dating event this weekend for over 50 and she posted on FB yesterday asking if anyone knows any single men over 50: she doesn't have enough. In this area, single men in their 20's and early 30's are plentiful. Around 35, the balance shifts. Speed dating for 24-36 almost always sells out for the men. 32-49, 30-45, 40-55 and 55+ pretty much always sell out for the women.

I was at a travel Meetup event recently in which there were 19 women and 8 men present. It wasn't a single's travel group: two of the men were married. One of the men asked about the gender imbalance and was told that was not a travel thing; it was a Portland social dynamic. When I turned around a few minutes later, he was gone. (Although the last two trips I went on through a travel group were both about 75% women and the only men on each trip were there with their wives).

I was talking to a friend the other day about why I haven't been hosting or attending as many social events lately and I told him that after 5 years, I was burnt out on hosting and attending events that regardless of what they were supposed to be end up just being a bunch of women sitting around bitching about how much it sucks to try to date here. That, and I'm tired of always being either the youngest or oldest person at these events-I turn 41 next week. Even the friend who is hosting the above mentioned speed dating event (late 30's) told me she's been applying for and just interviewed for a job in another city because she doesn't want to be single the rest of her life. Another friend (early 40's male) just moved to Connecticut. He told me if it wasn't due to his immigration status, he would have left this area for one with a better dating scene years ago.

I don't want to start over somewhere else at this stage. I have a good life here. Now I'm working on accepting that by choosing to not start over elsewhere, I'm most likely choosing to remain single.
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Old 07-03-2015, 02:51 AM
 
Location: U.S.A., Earth
5,288 posts, read 3,749,440 times
Reputation: 5381
I did indeed hear from several sources how DC area is great if you're a single guy looking for single women.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mongoslade223 View Post
If that's true I guess I'm cancelling my move to L.A!
Quote:
Originally Posted by thatguy1 View Post
HAHA, no kidding. Just as I'm about to move to San Diego.
I recently moved to the west coast too. What makes my situation worse is I'm in a relatively remote and small town, so the deck is stacked against me even more

ADDITION: Even worse is some of these women are really into outdoorsy stuff, which is NOT me!


One woman friend called me and recalled tales of how she'd constantly get hit on by men when she was in CA even though she wasn't single anymore. It got bad enough that she made her husband walk with her everywhere, even to the restroom door. One time, she got hit on after being left alone for only 5 minutes. Another time, a guy pretended to hit her car just so they could exchange insurance information, and also get her phone number.

Sad thing was, I'm sure these were stories of entertainment and what not to do, but I was taking pretty meticulous notes

Last edited by ackmondual; 07-03-2015 at 03:18 AM..
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Old 07-03-2015, 03:02 AM
 
3,751 posts, read 4,348,739 times
Reputation: 3639
It's true. It's extremely difficult for a man to get a decent girlfriend (or really any girlfriend at all) out West. Especially after high school/college, it seems like every girl here is taken by their late teens/early 20s so if you miss that boat you might not get any love action until your 30s/40s.

It's not only because of the skewed sex ratio, but also the misandrist and reserved culture that is typical of America, but definitely the strongest out West. Even if you do find somebody, most women here are more interested in "hooking up" and are disgusted by anything romantic. Which is why they gravitate towards the "badass" and loser types.

I'm an intelligent, not terrible looking, outgoing and polite person who isn't afraid of pursuing the opposite sex yet every woman I have ever fancied at all has turned me down. The only women who have ever showed me physical affection are either twice my age or strippers.

If you don't look like Channing Tatum or act like a wannabe Eminem women here won't touch you with a ten foot pole. Because women here know they can have virtually any guy they want, even if they are obese and have a nasty attitude.

That's one reason I was considering moving to North Carolina for a while - apparently they have a surplus of females.
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Old 08-25-2015, 08:57 AM
 
6 posts, read 9,051 times
Reputation: 15
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!
this is interesting hearing it,but how can someone make a good safety living out of all this;especially having a good woman to make babies with&to get a good job?me i wanna make good friends ooooo.
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Old 08-26-2015, 03:42 PM
 
474 posts, read 346,611 times
Reputation: 385
Quote:
Originally Posted by NWGirl74 View Post
I haven't read this entire thread. It popped up on the bottom of the screen as related/similar to something else I was reading.

I live in an area where more and more my girlfriends, including myself, are giving up. I have a friend who is hosting a speed dating event this weekend for over 50 and she posted on FB yesterday asking if anyone knows any single men over 50: she doesn't have enough. In this area, single men in their 20's and early 30's are plentiful. Around 35, the balance shifts. Speed dating for 24-36 almost always sells out for the men. 32-49, 30-45, 40-55 and 55+ pretty much always sell out for the women.

I was at a travel Meetup event recently in which there were 19 women and 8 men present. It wasn't a single's travel group: two of the men were married. One of the men asked about the gender imbalance and was told that was not a travel thing; it was a Portland social dynamic. When I turned around a few minutes later, he was gone. (Although the last two trips I went on through a travel group were both about 75% women and the only men on each trip were there with their wives).

I was talking to a friend the other day about why I haven't been hosting or attending as many social events lately and I told him that after 5 years, I was burnt out on hosting and attending events that regardless of what they were supposed to be end up just being a bunch of women sitting around bitching about how much it sucks to try to date here. That, and I'm tired of always being either the youngest or oldest person at these events-I turn 41 next week. Even the friend who is hosting the above mentioned speed dating event (late 30's) told me she's been applying for and just interviewed for a job in another city because she doesn't want to be single the rest of her life. Another friend (early 40's male) just moved to Connecticut. He told me if it wasn't due to his immigration status, he would have left this area for one with a better dating scene years ago.

I don't want to start over somewhere else at this stage. I have a good life here. Now I'm working on accepting that by choosing to not start over elsewhere, I'm most likely choosing to remain single.
You've got to be joking here. I lived in PDX between 2007 and 2013 and I swear everywhere I went out in that town was four or five dudes to every woman. One of the biggest things I hated about it. That and that dank overcast three-quarters of a year.
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