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Old 09-20-2016, 01:58 PM
 
3,137 posts, read 2,316,544 times
Reputation: 6071

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Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
I've known teachers, nurses, and other professional women who were single going into age 30. Very few of them seemed bothered that they were single.I have never been in a position where any single woman was asking me if I had a friend or relative who was single.
They shouldn't be bothered to be single. Late 20s and 30s is still considered young. And I've known people who didn't marry for the first time until their 50s. And some never. They have a happy and fulfilled life regardless.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:01 PM
 
3,137 posts, read 2,316,544 times
Reputation: 6071
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
I have been ridiculed for flat out refusing to date a woman who has a kid but I always take a hardline stance. I have been called offensive names but I don't budge at all because it's my life and I will decide who I allow in it. My dating options will diminish but I am ok with that. I do not want kids it's why my engagement ended so I certainly don't want to be with a mother. Some guy sleeps you, she gets pregnant, and I end up raising the kid? Excuse me while I decline that deal I know that makes me sound evil but I ddon't care.

I am married now, but before that I also would never date a man with kids. I also got called names, mostly notably I was often called "selfish". I really don't care. I didn't want to financially support someone else's kids when they already had 2 parents (albeit divorced) who should have been providing for them. I found that often the step parents I knew were just treated as walking wallets to provide extra money for the family. And they were often treated like dirt. There is no way I would sign up for that.


People have no right to call you names regarding your own personal choices of who to date, marry or be friends with. That is way out of bounds.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:13 PM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,168 posts, read 7,418,895 times
Reputation: 8389
Quote:
Originally Posted by tassity22 View Post
I am married now, but before that I also would never date a man with kids. I also got called names, mostly notably I was often called "selfish". I really don't care. I didn't want to financially support someone else's kids when they already had 2 parents (albeit divorced) who should have been providing for them. I found that often the step parents I knew were just treated as walking wallets to provide extra money for the family. And they were often treated like dirt. There is no way I would sign up for that.


People have no right to call you names regarding your own personal choices of who to date, marry or be friends with. That is way out of bounds.
But I will say this. To the women who have kids and are single please make sure the guy you do date is good to your kids. I see on the news too many times where some mothers whose children are killed by their boyfriends.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:15 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
92,215 posts, read 89,612,077 times
Reputation: 100432
Quote:
Originally Posted by wanderlust76 View Post
You clearly don't get it or have ready any of the thread. That's ok though. Actually, there isn't a lot of single women without kids in their 30's in many parts of the country. Backup your data with your demographic before I even start to take you serious. Many of the ones that don't are white upper class or upper middle class professional women that have a high income requirement for their mate. Like I said ...read the thread maybe you'll get up to speed, either way I don't really care. I gotta get back to my spreadsheets unfortunately it's been fun though.
I think the bolded is the key. Rocky, IIRC, lives on the West Coast, CA as I recall. He's rolling in single women w/o kids, and I'll add that they're not all upper-middle class professionals. There are women working as office admins and the like, who have their act together enough to not have kids until they're married. It's not that hard to do, when you put your mind to it. I'm not sure what your point is, there.

It sounds like you may be located in a region where people marry young and divorce young, or something...? If so, my condolences. I think some of the differences of opinion on the dating scene we have on this forum relate to geography.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:24 PM
 
5,721 posts, read 5,324,549 times
Reputation: 4363
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
I think the bolded is the key. Rocky, IIRC, lives on the West Coast, CA as I recall. He's rolling in single women w/o kids, and I'll add that they're not all upper-middle class professionals. There are women working as office admins and the like, who have their act together enough to not have kids until they're married. It's not that hard to do, when you put your mind to it. I'm not sure what your point is, there.

It sounds like you may be located in a region where people marry young and divorce young, or something...? If so, my condolences. I think some of the differences of opinion on the dating scene we have on this forum relate to geography.
I think you're right Ruth4Truth and that's what the whole thread was about. I just don't have the patience or will to care about it anymore when combined with my experiences, and feelings in some other ways.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:26 PM
 
6,307 posts, read 8,346,391 times
Reputation: 8130
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
I have been ridiculed for flat out refusing to date a woman who has a kid but I always take a hardline stance. I have been called offensive names but I don't budge at all because it's my life and I will decide who I allow in it. My dating options will diminish but I am ok with that. I do not want kids it's why my engagement ended so I certainly don't want to be with a mother. Some guy sleeps you, she gets pregnant, and I end up raising the kid? Excuse me while I decline that deal I know that makes me sound evil but I ddon't care.
FWIW, I like your attitude.

You seem to understand what should be the simple concept that choices have consequences. Good for you.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:27 PM
 
63,024 posts, read 53,873,446 times
Reputation: 18887
Quote:
Originally Posted by mishigas73 View Post
It's the same for women who don't want to date guys with kids.

With any filter like this, of course the dating pool will be smaller, and there will be a certain percentage of people who "don't get it".
I'm one of those persons who doesn't want to date women with children. I'm not ready for kids. I know this will shrink my dating pool by leaps and bounds, especially living in the metro area that I live in. There are some women who are looking for a man to play "dad" to their kids.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:34 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
92,215 posts, read 89,612,077 times
Reputation: 100432
Quote:
Originally Posted by wanderlust76 View Post
I think you're right Ruth4Truth and that's what the whole thread was about. I just don't have the patience or will to care about it anymore when combined with my experiences, and feelings in some other ways.
The thread topic is about a different aspect of geography, though; it's about comparative numbers of men & women, or single men & single women. It's not about regional differences in percentage of single moms, which is your issue, or one of your issues.

And I still maintain that the male/female numbers imbalance is a bogus issue, because in the areas that are majority young single males, there are plenty of young, child-free women who are shut out of the dating game, which is weird. I'm not sure if Rocky is in one of those bro-majority areas, but he's not having any trouble meeting 30's child-free women. I wouldn't characterize the entire US dating culture as "trash"; IMO you might have a different perspective on it if you relocated elsewhere, but--suit yourself.
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Old 09-20-2016, 02:41 PM
 
63,024 posts, read 53,873,446 times
Reputation: 18887
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
I have been ridiculed for flat out refusing to date a woman who has a kid but I always take a hardline stance. I have been called offensive names but I don't budge at all because it's my life and I will decide who I allow in it. My dating options will diminish but I am ok with that. I do not want kids it's why my engagement ended so I certainly don't want to be with a mother. Some guy sleeps you, she gets pregnant, and I end up raising the kid? Excuse me while I decline that deal I know that makes me sound evil but I ddon't care.
And I respect that. I've not personally been called names, but I know of men who have been insulted because of their refusal to date women with children. I'm just going under the idea that it could happen to me. I could get cursed out for not wanted to date a woman with kids. Oddly, women with children have not been interested in me.

In my case, I'm not ready for children NOW. I might be ready later on when I'm better established and prepared for it. Now is not the time for me. And I definitely don't want to date a woman who has had children outside of wedlock(and never got married). There is a reason that often happens. It shows recklessness.

And I get the part about raising someone else's kid. Getting cheated on would be a horrible thing to go through. And it would raise suspicions about the paternity of the child.
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Old 09-20-2016, 03:20 PM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,168 posts, read 7,418,895 times
Reputation: 8389
Quote:
Originally Posted by mishigas73 View Post
FWIW, I like your attitude.

You seem to understand what should be the simple concept that choices have consequences. Good for you.
Usually I get an unamed hate rep comment so this is refreshing.
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