Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Location: somewhere close to Tampa, but closer to the beach
2,035 posts, read 5,035,606 times
Reputation: 1099
Excellent moonie.. I have a dozen milk cartons coming your way!!
I would NEVER ask any woman i know..even the women in my family this question..UNLESS..they wanted to talk about it..somethings are strictly personal..
See **shrug** I don't really understand too thin, too fat, too tall, too short. You either like the look of someone or you don't. A bit like how irrelevant bank balance is. I mean how can you be too thin for someone? If you look at someone and you like them, start talking to them and enjoy their company, if you have a connection, either platonic or romantic, would you then reject them, reject the connection based on some arbitrary idea you have about ideal weight/height/age that you are seeking? I mean I know there are people that do because it's really important to them, hence me rarely mentioning either AND generally refusing to answer anyone that would ask anyway. NOT because I care or am self conscious about either but simply because the very act of asking for that info seems to suggest a level of preconception from the asker, to me. Like it's a way to pigeonhole. I don't like being pigeonholed.
If I really was self conscious about it I wouldnt freely tell anyone anything they want to know about me. Exact numbers arent a big deal to me but I'll put it this way. If a woman is taller than me or outweighs me then there will be no attraction. I can always spot that though with the naked eye, so there is no need for me to go up to someone and say "Hi, nice shoes, how much do you weigh?". For the record I have never asked any woman their weight however, I have asked ones I met online for pictures while also providing some of my own. I can more than decide on that if I am attracted to them.
Other things matter to a point, but as long as its not extreme I'm okay. For example. Say I met someone and we started dating and everything was hunky dory. A few weeks later I find out she has 100,000 dollars in credit card debt. I'm going to assume she's a retard and bail. If on the other hand I discovered she only had 140 dollars in her checking account, I really dont care as long as she has a job and is responsible.
I would never go up to someone and chat them up and have an attraction, then find out she is 3 lbs. over my "ideal number" and leave because of that. I dont have set numbers in my head for anything other than the basic "I want to be taller and weigh more than her". I dont think thats too much to ask for or abnormal.
Excellent moonie.. I have a dozen milk cartons coming your way!!
I would NEVER ask any woman i know..even the women in my family this question..UNLESS..they wanted to talk about it..somethings are strictly personal..
Thanks si, but I really only need A glass of milk to go with my one brownie for the week! You can put the other 11 cartons with my remaining 7 brownies, okay?
Yeah, agreed! I'm the same. I don't think I've ever asked someone their weight ever. If someone offers the information that's cool but it doesn't really change my view of them, whatever that may be.
If I really was self conscious about it I wouldnt freely tell anyone anything they want to know about me. Exact numbers arent a big deal to me but I'll put it this way. If a woman is taller than me or outweighs me then there will be no attraction. I can always spot that though with the naked eye, so there is no need for me to go up to someone and say "Hi, nice shoes, how much do you weigh?". For the record I have never asked any woman their weight however, I have asked ones I met online for pictures while also providing some of my own. I can more than decide on that if I am attracted to them.
Classic! I wonder what kind of response you'd get if you did?
I could almost imagine doing that as a kind of performance art just to film the reactions.
Sounds like you got it sorted. I figure some people are really private so maybe it's not about being self conscious and more about sharing what they feel is relevent? I have a family member like that. Known her all my life. She's not self conscious and has no reason to be especially around me but I have no idea how much she weighs. She's not big or little, she just is. I think you can tell so much more about someone by talking to them and taking in their overall features.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason28
Other things matter to a point, but as long as its not extreme I'm okay. For example. Say I met someone and we started dating and everything was hunky dory. A few weeks later I find out she has 100,000 dollars in credit card debt. I'm going to assume she's a retard and bail. If on the other hand I discovered she only had 140 dollars in her checking account, I really dont care as long as she has a job and is responsible.
I suspect you're a good bloke so I'm going to assume you'd double check how the $100,000 credit card debt came to be before going with the retard option. Could be medical bills, or difficulties with mortgage etc and not just some rampant shoe fetish.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason28
I would never go up to someone and chat them up and have an attraction, then find out she is 3 lbs. over my "ideal number" and leave because of that. I dont have set numbers in my head for anything other than the basic "I want to be taller and weigh more than her". I dont think thats too much to ask for or abnormal.
Agreed. Least I agree that your wants are reasonable and sound fair to me. Having him be taller and weigh more isn't really something I've thought about for my own attraction wants. I tend more to attraction based on intellect. So if a guy is dumb as doggy doo doo whilst he might be a great bloke to be friends with I probably wouldn't be physically attracted to him even if he looked like Brad Pitt or whatever the current paragon of manhood is.
I guess that's why I don't get the whole age/weight thing in the first place. I mean fine, it's a taboo, but seriously who really wants to know and why, in the first place?
I can't help wonder if people would offer the information freely to those who weren't asking, you know? Like maybe the very act of asking makes people clam up and not want to say because they distrust the motives of the person asking?
I'd rep you but you're bound to say something good at some point in the next couple of days, as you do, and I'm tired of not being able to rep you for your great posts because I already did for your brownies.
When it is apparent that the person I am revealing this information to doesn't really require it and knowing it will not change their perception of me then I have no problem revealing it. I will say though that some of the ludicrous behaviours that have come from people when they've been given this trivial piece of information has taught me to be very selective about who I divulge it to.
I agree. It's one thing to be asked one's age and weight by a doctor, but if the person asking is a social contact and not someone that I am romantically interested in, I feel that it's none of their business. And what is a guy going to do with knowing my age and weight anyway? Compare me to all the other women he knows? So if someone (a man) does ask me my age I feel that he is trying to objectify me and put me in some category of his personal statistics on women, much like sports fans keep track of their favorite team's stats. I don't like to be evaluated by my age first, least of all by a man I have just met and one that I will never date. I don't want people discussing me and saying "hey that miu, she's 50 years old and Chinese...." With men, that sort of line of thinking leads to all that other sleazy stuff they think about when they encounter a woman and evaluate her as a potential sexual partner. Yucky. Gross. Creepy.
A women being asked her age and weight is akin to me going up to each guy I meet and right off asking them how much they make and what college they graduated from. I'd think that they'd want me to get to know them better in terms of their personality and interests before asking about their more intimate personal information. So yeah, being asked one's age and weight is an invasion of our privacy.
If a man asks me for my age, then it's a permanent turnoff in terms of my wanting to know them better as a friend or more. Of the men that have become my s/o's and good platonic friends, none of them have ever come out and asked me my age. Eventually I will say something that alludes to my age, such as saying what bands I saw live when I was in college but I find that in a true friendship, my age (and weight) doesn't (and shouldn't) matter to them.
I suppose also, a woman not wanting to reveal her age is also because of most traditional world cultures are patricarchal, where the men are viewed getting better with age. The older they get, the more respect they get as people due in part to having more power and money. Their wrinkles are seen as wisdom, and if they have money and power, they are admired. And of the men in power, it's acceptable for them to have a wife or girlfriend half their age. On the other hand, a woman is judged primarily on her beauty and childbearing factors, which nature gives her more of when she is young. With women, wrinkles are a sign of old age and being less valuable in her society. So naturally, women want to appear younger than they are and therefore are offended to be asked their age.
Even when a woman is in her early twenties, men ask her age in part to determine if she is legally old enough to date.
So basically, asking a woman's age is a sexual overture that most women don't welcome and find very rude.
I'm asked more for my age. I admit I was ashamed of my weight when I was heavier; I should have been. But I don't really like being asked in general.
I've been told I look anywhere from 27-32 and lighter than I actually was, both at my heaviest and my thinnest. I probably could have gotten away with lying, but I'll typically not confirm one way or another.
I'm asked more for my age. I admit I was ashamed of my weight when I was heavier; I should have been. But I don't really like being asked in general.
I've been told I look anywhere from 27-32 and lighter than I actually was, both at my heaviest and my thinnest. I probably could have gotten away with lying, but I'll typically not confirm one way or another.
You should try once again, without the bowl of chocolate, when standing on the meter
I've also had people place the meter on their apartment carpet and depress themselves. When I tell them to do it in the bathroom, they thank me for making them weigh less
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If you look at someone and you like them, start talking to them and enjoy their company, if you have a connection, either platonic or romantic, would you then reject them, reject the connection based on some arbitrary idea you have about ideal weight/height/age that you are seeking? I mean I know there are people that do because it's really important to them, hence me rarely mentioning either AND generally refusing to answer anyone that would ask anyway. NOT because I care or am self conscious about either but simply because the very act of asking for that info seems to suggest a level of preconception from the asker, to me. 
Like it's a way to pigeonhole. I don't like being pigeonholed. 
Thanks si, but I really only need A glass of milk to go with my one brownie for the week! 
but it doesn't really change my view of them, whatever that may be. 
