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Fair enough, but I'm not asking to detail any problems, I'm asking men, why they keep silent and let their wives change their lives? And I'm talking extreme life changing events...
some men are not allowed to have hobbies even...? Why do they comply?
I guess what I'm trying to find out is why would a man settle when, he could possibly talk to his wife, and let her know his needs?
Because men just want their wives to be happy. Then their wives stop appreciating them. They become simply "providers," thus, they go out and look for the other woman (OW).
And they use sex to release all that pain and misery and feelings of imprisonment.
Men have feelings, too, you know. It's not all about us.
Well when you look at the first couple of posts its quite obvious that even with simple written instruction it doesn't help
Next
It's a discussion forum dude. Of course the women will chime in.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coolhand68
I typically don't air my dirty laundry out in public because it opens up the flood gates for people who try to offer "simple" solutions to complicated issues. I know exactly what I need to do, and when I need to do it, and I don't need anyone to judge me or dictate how I should be handling my business. For what it's worth, I go head to head often, so there isn't an issue for me in regard to speaking up. Anyone who knows me knows that the last thing I can be accused of is not speaking my mind. There's also two sides to every story, so it's not all one sided. If someone asks me specifically what the problems are, I'll discuss it one on one, but I don't feel I need anyone's advice on how to deal with them.
I think the majority of people know what they need to do. They use the forum as an "avoidance" tool. This is me, avoiding.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhett_Butler
How many times can particular problems be discussed?
Kids may still involved and the problem may not be an absolute deal-breaker, so where does one go from there?
Let's talk about it until we're blue in the face and always agree that we'll work on the problem, but never ACTUALLY work on the problem...
So forgive me if maybe I vent elsewhere?
I wasn't in any way trying to make light of anyone's situation. A lot of people come to a discussion forum looking for advice and some just come to vent. Your input is always welcome in my book, because you offer a positive outlook. Your posts always make me smile. I have the utmost respect for your situation, and if and when it becomes a "dealbreaker", only you can make that decision.
Last edited by floridadreamer; 08-23-2009 at 12:18 PM..
In reading so many threads...I've found that some men, fear discussing problems with their wives. Any kind of problems, instead, they enable their wives to continue bad behavior, why?
Maybe for the sake of keeping the peace? If a partner is completely unwilling to change their bad behavior and becomes openly hostile, sometimes we tend to just put up and shut up, even though it's probably not the right thing to do. I am as guilty of this as any man...I don't like confrontation or drama unless it really has to come down to a fight, while others wouldn't think twice about putting their foot up someone's ass.
Women, also, have done this for decades - give up who they are for the sake of the marriage/kids. I think it goes both ways.
I'm not saying it doesn't....but I'm asking about men, b/c they in most cases, are more silent then women...but yes, your right, and there are women who also become silent, but I'm asking the men why
Because men just want their wives to be happy. Then their wives stop appreciating them. They become simply "providers," thus, they go out and look for the other woman (OW).
And they use sex to release all that pain and misery and feelings of imprisonment.
Men have feelings, too, you know. It's not all about us.
Yes, they do indeed have feelings...I believe in a lot of cases, men are more sensitive then women...I say that, b/c I worked with nothing but men for 10 years or more...
It's very sad, when a spouse doesn't realize the needs of their companions...
It's a discussion forum dude. Of course the women will chime in.
I think the majority of people know what they need to do. They use the forum as an "avoidance" tool. This is me, avoiding.
I wasn't in any way trying to make light of anyone's situation. A lot of people come to a discussion forum looking for advice and some just come to vent. Your input is always welcome in my book, because you offer a positive outlook. Your posts always make me smile. I have the utmost respect for your situation, and if and when it becomes a "dealbreaker", only you can make that decision.
Maybe, just maybe, I'm thinking we could use this thread as a vent/discussion...in other words...no judging, no discrediting or lashing out at someone b/c they don't speak up...or don't seek answers...lets just discuss and maybe we could help each other understand?
anyone who comes into this thread who condisends, ignore them...and just keep on discussing the issue at hand...
I'd really like to see that happen...
Creme
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