Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This is a genuine question, purely out of curiosity, but when you date a significantly younger man does it not at some point make you feel old, and don't you constantly wonder if he would rather be with another young person??Especially if he has no kids and you can't/don't want any more?
I have always just not understood how even a really youthful and attractive woman deals with this issue in a long term relationship. There is so much media attention right now about being a "Cougar". Obviously anyone can see why a 25 year old might be more appealing than the usual 45-50 year old, sure they are less jaded, more open, and of course physically more appealing all else being equal.
But I always wonder how a woman with a significantly younger man deals with the fact that as time marches on she will lose her looks before he does, when our society is SO geared to the woman being s*xually attractive and fertile.I feel certain that I would feel that way, and therefore would rather be with someone close to my own age.
Are you women just super- confident and more free of insecurities than the rest of us?
There are lots of joked here about Cougars, but as a 41 year old woman who gets the eye from younger men but would never date anyone under 35 if I were single anyhow, I ask any honest cougars: what is it that overcomes your insecurities and makes it worth it? the s*x? the feeling of being younger by association? or is it just that one special person that makes time go away?
Why would your lower limit cut-off be 35? Why not someone your age or older? I've dated two men significantly younger than me, and no, I never felt old. That's because I never feel old! No one can "make you feel" anything unless you have issues of your own.
I don't deliberately seek them out. I've also dated men significantly older. I'm equal-opportunity.
And yes, it is the sax. Nothing is hotter than a man that can handle a horn.
I do generally date younger men, but only a few years younger. Nothing that would give me a nickname.
But I have, in the past, dated a couple of much younger men. I never considered those relationships to be long term, and neither did they. We simply enjoyed each other's company. As for making me feel old? Hell no. I'm in great shape. For a serious long-term companion, I doubt I would find anyone more than 10 years younger or so, to be compatible enough to last.
41 and 35? Shoot - that's only six years. That's nothing. Certainly not "cougar" territory.
This is a genuine question, purely out of curiosity, but when you date a significantly younger man does it not at some point make you feel old, and don't you constantly wonder if he would rather be with another young person??Especially if he has no kids and you can't/don't want any more?
I have always just not understood how even a really youthful and attractive woman deals with this issue in a long term relationship.
You just used "Cougar" and "Long Term" in the same post.
You are kidding right?
The vast majority bang their 30 yr old for a few weeks, or maybe months if they are lucky. Cougar isn't exactly a great business to be in if you are looking for long term.
It wouldn't make me feel old - just incompatible. A 25 year old guy is not appealing to me at all in that way. It was when I was 25. If I was into that I wouldn't feel insecure, but just not connected because of the vast differences in life experience and generational issues. It would never make me feel younger, unless I could transport myself back in time to being that age. If someone is just out for s*x, whatever. I don't get the cougar thing, it can't make up for being with people who are part of your generation.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,005,830 times
Reputation: 9418
The guy I'm with right now is only two years younger than me but everyone else thinks he looks older--much older--so it doesn't bother me. I have no desire to date younger men. They're nice to look at but I'm just attracted to my own age range. It is funny tho', when I was in my early 20s on up, men in their late 30s always caught my attention most. I still find that the most visually appealing age-range for men, although, I no longer want to date them.
ETA: Oops, I should have started this with--I'm not a "cougar" ( at term) but....
I thought cougars by definition weren't looking for serious relationships, but just short-term fun.
Everyone has their own interpretation of the term. It's a ridiculous notion to think you can categorize every woman that dates a younger man, under the same umbrella. It's a stupid useless word.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,005,830 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom
Everyone has their own interpretation of the term. It's a ridiculous notion to think you can categorize every woman that dates a younger man, under the same umbrella. It's a stupid useless word.
Thank you!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
For a serious long-term companion, I doubt I would find anyone more than 10 years younger or so, to be compatible enough to last.
