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I am not cool with anyone I dated being all cozy with any females at all. To me it just seems like you are asking for some BS to happen.
A relationship without trust isn't much of a relationship. My parents both had friends of the opposite sex. My wife has friends of the opposite sex, as do I. It is all about trust, and without trust why even be in a relationship?
Keeping a SO captive, or forbidding them to be friends with their friends that happen to be of the opposite sex is controlling and a clear sign of insecurity. My best friend is of the opposite sex, she's already gone to bed. My list of friends includes several of the opposite sex, some of whom I pursued and dated before meeting my wife.
I notice AGAIN and AGAIN problems with the opp sex platonic "friend" being a problem in a relationship. Yeh..blah blah blah...if they really love you
I am not cool with anyone I dated being all cozy with any females at all. To me it just seems like you are asking for some BS to happen.
I think of women who are a generation or so older than I am. I do not remember them having to have all these male "friends" and the guys did not have a bunch of female friends either. Secret gay lovers aside...I think that way had a lot less drama. Too bad its not the good old days.
My parents didn't have any SINGLE friends period. Their friends were all couples.
Heck no. As for me, I hardly have time for my male friends so I would be awfully curious about my wife's time for man buddies. Couples friends work great.
Good point...who has time for "friends" once you have kids? Shouldn't you be spending that time with your kids, and not with your friends? Grown-up responsibilities.
When I was growing up neither of my parents had friends of the opposite sex. They did have a couple that they were friends with and did things together only as couples. My father however had a secret friend we did not know about for a long time, it was his secretary, who he was having an affair with. My parents divorced when I was 19 and my father and his secretary married. That marriage only last 2 years.
When I was growing up neither of my parents had friends of the opposite sex. They did have a couple that they were friends with and did things together only as couples. My father however had a secret friend we did not know about for a long time, it was his secretary, who he was having an affair with. My parents divorced when I was 19 and my father and his secretary married. That marriage only last 2 years.
I can't resist. I tried, but I just couldn't pass it up.
Did the new one fail because she found out he was sleeping with his secretary?
I will never understand what makes "the other woman" think that the man she's having the affair with will be any more faithful to her than he was with the wife he cheated on.
They did. Most of their friends were couples but they've had single friends (often divorced) over the years. Although while many of their friends started out as a friend to one of them they all became mutual friends in time. If friendships created problems in their marriage I was never aware of it.
My SO and I are the same, the majority of our friends are mutual. He has some female friends at work that I had never met until recently but I knew about them. I have no problem with him having female friends. I might take issue with it if he had a friend he didn't want me to meet, particularly if he wanted to spend time alone with them, but honestly I'd take issue with that even if the friend was male.
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute
I think in the old days, the spouse was the important relationship and no one, not even supposedly platonic friends were allowed to create wedges in that relationship. If a man really cares about his wife, then does he need platonic girlfriends -- many who really aren't all that platonic. What would he need them for? A shoulder to cry on? He has his wife's shoulder for that -- and the reverse is also true. Why would a married woman need supposedly platonic male friends? To cry on their shoulders? To help move furniture?
By that reasoning, what do they need any friends for? They have each other, what purpose do platonic friends of the same gender serve? My male friends serve the same purpose as my female friends. Sometimes they are a shoulder to cry on and I've asked them more than once to help move furniture too!
I wouldn't get involved with a man who expected me to give up any friends in order to have a relationship with him. I don't have the patience for relationship games, especially one that involves destroying a long term friendship based on gender alone.
I notice AGAIN and AGAIN problems with the opp sex platonic "friend" being a problem in a relationship. Yeh..blah blah blah...if they really love you
I am not cool with anyone I dated being all cozy with any females at all. To me it just seems like you are asking for some BS to happen.
I think of women who are a generation or so older than I am. I do not remember them having to have all these male "friends" and the guys did not have a bunch of female friends either. Secret gay lovers aside...I think that way had a lot less drama. Too bad its not the good old days.
Yes, my parents did have and still do have opposite sex friends - but I should mention they are mutual friends of both my parents. It's not like my mom is going to lunch alone with a male friend.
I do think partners can have opposite sex friends but there are, of course, boundries. What exactly do you mean by "being all cozy"?
it's funny i never thought of it. no they did NOT have opposite sex freinds. i mean they had couples they hung out with, but they guys hung out together and the girls hung out together.
but wouldnt like to go back to the "old" days. there are many times where i feel more comfortable or have a better conversation with men than women
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