Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I don't think guys over 40 who have never been married are any less mature than the ones who have been married. Some guys marry BECAUSE they are immature, they want someone to baby them and take care of them like their mommy. I've seen lot's of guys over 40 who are married and very immature. Maturity is an individual thing.
I guess when you compare a Thursday evening of hiking to a kids sporting event then coming home to the DVR, vs going to the local wing place for a couple beers and the game, it does sound immature. But I have yet for one of my married (male) friends, say they didnt miss that when the wife wasnt around.
Am I immature? I'll tell you what immature is--it's marrying out of desperation or need, not because you're in love and want to place your one and only in that special place in your life. Immaturity is getting married and expecting to have your life the way you want it and everyone else be damned, including your spouse and kids. Immaturity is being so wrapped up in your testosterone that you're incapable of meeting the emotional needs of your family.
My money and my life are for myself. So what? Where is it stated that I'm required to sire someone? This is the life I've chosen because it's what I want--not what someone else wants. Far too many people get married and have kids due to societal pressure and we see the ramifications of this every day.
No, I'm not immature. If anything, I'm mature and cognizant.
\
Exactly!!!!!!!!!! Did anybody else even read this???
who was a snotty know it all type who always thought his **it didn't stink. No one else was bright enough, well read enough, smart enough, well informed enough for him. Except that he shacks up with and marries a woman who was nowhere near his level of intellect and intelligence
while living together she gets pregnant and wants her to have an abortion but claims he "never knew" she was a devout Catholic and it was against her religion. so they "had" to get married. how could he not have known when he professes to know everything else under the sun?
During the time they were living together he never revealed anything of a deeply personal nature to me about their relationship(but of course i stupidly revealed all my flaws and weaknesses to him) other than how good she was in bed. most of his conversation was about how he wanted to bed other women. in fact he told me on their honeymoon there was a woman dressed in a bikini who supposedly enticed him on the staircase by the ice machine
at the time i was sexually inexperienced and he had more experience with me with the ladies (he didn't have a lot of partners though maybe one or two prior to this woman) and i think he secretly kind of exploited this to make himself feel better about himself. he used to constantly put me down sexually until one day i just ended it
but what i wanted to ask is does the above description point to someone who was immature? this happened like about 25 years ago. i think he is still married to this person. is it possible his wife remained totally blind to his faults for 25 years?
i remember at one point he confessed to me that he was envious of me because i didn't have to deal with a wife
Ahh..this is a question right up my alley! I'm a lifelong bachelor; happily, gleefully single in my mid 40's and I don't plan to ever get married. I've had too much fun being single my whole life. As a longtime musician, and former semi-pro baseball player, I had too much fun being single and can honestly say I never had a problem finding women; I reckon I've been intimate with 50-60 in my time. And I could, for the life of me, never understand the allure of marriage, unless, that is, you want to have kids and raise a family. Which I never did.
And sure, I've been told I'm immature my entire life, and I don't disagree one iota. Immaturity keeps my young at heart and happy. And when I look at all the miserable, so-called mature, married, bored guys I know, I revel all the more in my immaturity.
But pic this: what's funny is that it's never other men who call me immature; it's always women, and usually ones that are a tad bitter after I maybe dumped them or traded them in on a newer, younger model, so to speak. So I always take their comments with a big grain of salt, anyway.
But sure, older single guys are often immature by choice, like me, and also because the stress of a loveless marriage and adhering to societal norms hasn't beaten them down into what you call "maturity," but what I call soul-dead.
But I've decided that being previously married must tend to provide maturity because of the required give and take in a relationship, not having the universe revolve around him, that sort of thing? but my interaction with them was like talking to a 19 year old boy.
Well all you womenzzzz' out there explain this to me then. Previously being marriage represents them being able to understand give and take and responsibility? Well if so why are they divorced then? Because A- he either was irresponsible and a jerk so she left him or B- he was a good guy but got run over by her which in that case he wishes he had never married. More than one poor dude is living in a trailer right now straped financially after wifey divorced him, kept the house and is getting alimony and child support.
And speaking of 19 years old, let us review Hulk Hogan and his wife Linda. Hogan had a successful career, they had kids and what happens? divorce that's what. Now while he may be prancing around with a younger chick now let us not forget dear cougar Linda who isn't being exactly mature either.Take a look at the nice photo of her with a new boytoy.
See now if that boy toy of hers is smart as he gets older, he''ll remain immature, get laid, have fun, and avoid having his wife pillage him when he is 50 something while she finds a guy half her age. What does a never married guy do if he isn't a mamas boy or gay like marshfield mom suggests? Well he is free to bring home any girl he pleases if he meets them whether she be a 55 year old chick like Linda Hogan or some 20 year old hottie and if the drama gets too much he is in control free just to say goodbye without being dragged through divorce court.
Some would call that selfish or self centered, I call it smart and just independent miinded. But then again why isn't a woman called self centered or selfish when she wants to latch on to a guy and change him?
Hulk Hogan's Cougar Queen wife dating a 19-year-old? | The Dish Rag | Los Angeles Times (http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/thedishrag/2008/06/hulk-hogans-wif.html - broken link)
Ahh..this is a question right up my alley! I'm a lifelong bachelor; happily, gleefully single in my mid 40's and I don't plan to ever get married. I've had too much fun being single my whole life. As a longtime musician, and former semi-pro baseball player, I had too much fun being single and can honestly say I never had a problem finding women; I reckon I've been intimate with 50-60 in my time. And I could, for the life of me, never understand the allure of marriage, unless, that is, you want to have kids and raise a family. Which I never did.
And sure, I've been told I'm immature my entire life, and I don't disagree one iota. Immaturity keeps my young at heart and happy. And when I look at all the miserable, so-called mature, married, bored guys I know, I revel all the more in my immaturity.
But pic this: what's funny is that it's never other men who call me immature; it's always women, and usually ones that are a tad bitter after I maybe dumped them or traded them in on a newer, younger model, so to speak. So I always take their comments with a big grain of salt, anyway.
But sure, older single guys are often immature by choice, like me, and also because the stress of a loveless marriage and adhering to societal norms hasn't beaten them down into what you call "maturity," but what I call soul-dead.
I agree with alot of what you say, but I don't know if you have ever been deep in love with someone but for me anyway that changes everything. You suddenly feel the desire to be different about some things freely. The way I see it you don't choose love it chooses you.
However I haven't been in love in a long time, I have met women I care about and want to know ongoing but not love. So, I have fun with it, and I enjoy my things in my life that I like. I am not a player and don't feel the need to measure my ego by how many women I can score with. I just know that I don't love them so I'm not going to commit just for the sake so then that woman has a choice, know me for what it is or move on. Either way I'm ok with the choice. However if she pushes for me to become "mature" in the sense of lying to myself about her and I, well then goodbye.
I have always been extra independent minded anyway, it just is who I am. But the future never knows who might come around. Either way life is a highway and it does good all in all.
When I bought the house off my dad in Miami one stipulation from him was that I take over his two dogs. I liked the dogs but was hesitant about taking on the responsibility of them but I did. They grew on me and they became great joy in my life. So glad I agreed to the terms of the dogs coming with the house. But like I said I always have disliked responsibilty but when I take on something I do so wholeheartedly
Lat year I tried out for a band. They wanted me to go to Europe for 6 months. One guy in the band started talking about how he passed on marriage and stuff to continue his dream of living the life of a traveling musician. His choice and good for him. However when not playing these guys drifted from side job to side job. I have steady employment and just can't tell my boss hold my job see ya in 6 months.
Another guy I know plays bass and got married and had kids. He plays local for the pleasure of playing but gave up the road life. He is happy having family. It is all individual choice in the end, priorities.
It's interesting that this idea of being single/immature is tied in with being a player or cougar. Suppose a 45 yr old never married man is not a player and his friends and dates are his own age. The people I know fit into that category, are mostly business owners and just don't fit the definition of immature. Independent? yes. Even quirky? yup. And they know how to have fun. It doesn't mean they live a carefree life and don't have problems.
i do not believe that for a second...i know older men,never married and they are absolutely great but like you mentioned:very picky and they have all the right to be picky,because they have a lot to offer...and for sure not immaturity!!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I had a friend
