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Maybe she can join some clubs? reading? language? any kind of interest she may have... crosstiching? comics? church/religion? there are so many out there. Have her go to MeetUp.com and click on her area. There are all sorts of groups, literally hundreds, perhaps doing something she really likes would make her more comfortable and relaxed and help her make a connection...
I'm shy and have the same problems the OP has descibed. By FAR, the best way for me to meet men is at church, or having friends (who invite THEIR friends) over for dinner or breakfast. I LOVE to cook, so cooking for crowds will always make me come out of my shell. I'm the one in control of the situation, and I'm not tagging along with a buddy trying to force myself to be social. Good luck!
She has been on dates with men and they never call back, at least that's what she tells me. some guys have told her that she was boring. Many men claim to like shy women, but I guess they don't.
Hi NYchi,
Shy and boring is not quite the same thing. If she really wants to find an SO, one can't do it in their basement. If you are women, you need to go where the men are and in venues where one may find the particular the kind of men they like.
I've always wanted to try habitat for humanity! it sounds like a blast! doesn't it require a ton of money to put into it? I'm kinda broke but have always wanted to help build a house.
anyways, I'm shy myself, but I come out of my shell pretty quickly I guess so I don't have such a hard time, and like others have said: it helps when there are familiar things/people to go along with the new things/people. Why does your friend not show up to your parties that you throw? She must have something she enjoys doing or wants to try that won't bore a man.
by the way, I think you're such a good friend for trying so hard to help her out!
They have things called Meetups where you can meet people in your area.
Hang out at Home Depot or Ace Hardware. Those store bores me but men love them.
She could try joining an adult penpal club. Maybe she'd meet someone through the internet.
Hi GypsySoul22,
Indeed. Think of what you don't like, go there, and enjoy the skewed ratios in your favor. Bait shops, chess clubs, computer swap meets, shooting hoops at the Y and anything else that drives the other foolish women away. There is nothing better than a skewed ratio in your favor. Clean up.
I have a friend who is really shy. She despises going out to any clubs are bars, and to be honest she rarely goes out, I keep telling her that she has to go out. She has tried online dating, but to no avail. what do you suggest?
Why should you try and change her; it's her life. If she wants to go out I'm sure she would just ask you. I'm very much like her and I remember all my outgoing/party friends would always try and get me to drink or go out. Just like your friend, it was just not my thing. Also, it does not really matter if a woman is "shy" because a women does not haft to walk up to random guys. All she needs to do is keep her figure and appearance in order and she should do just fine.
Last edited by Morphous01; 10-26-2009 at 05:11 PM..
Dear, she probably feels very strange in bars and clubs because they do not bring out her wonderful qualities.
As a caring friend you could maybe have what do they call them, a singles party where everyone brings a friend. Maybe not a party but a night out at a diner or restaurant or movie then restaurant.
Maybe she knows the chance of meeting MrRight at a bar or club is slim. I wish her good luck.
Why should you try and change her; it's her life. If she wants to go out I'm sure she would just ask you. I'm very much like her and I remember all my outgoing/party friends would always try and get me to drink or go out. Just like your friend, it was just not my thing.
Also, it does not really matter if a woman is "shy" because a women does not haft to walk up to random guys. All she needs to do is keep her figure and appearance in order and she should do just fine.
This is why I asked the question, because she does not like bars and I respect that, but she is looking for a boyfriend. I wanted to know what she could do since she is not very outgoing. thanks
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