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Old 10-30-2009, 01:41 PM
 
Location: Silicon Valley
850 posts, read 1,543,154 times
Reputation: 712

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mercury Cougar View Post
Reading comprehension, please. The "for you, maybe" comment was in response to your comment of "one always gets hurt".



That's far from the blanket statement you made of "One always gets hurt". You changing your mind now?
Mercury, whatever, I simply made a comment and it referred to some friends that I know have gone through it and how they felt about it. OMG WTF. Are you kidding me?
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Old 10-30-2009, 01:45 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,558,052 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by Autumn07 View Post
It's no way to go- someone will always end up hurt.
I agree. As far as I am concerned, anytime sex is involved in any relationship, inevitably feelings and emotions come into play.


Quote:
Plus atleast one of you will just feel used. Most likely the girl. Do guys ever feel used/hurt???
Go for a meaningful relationship- one you can like yourself for but start out as just friends first (no put intended!)
The potential is equal for girls or guys to be hurt by this type of relationship.
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Old 10-30-2009, 01:52 PM
 
6,034 posts, read 10,657,429 times
Reputation: 3989
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunnnee View Post
Mercury, whatever, I simply made a comment and it referred to some friends that I know have gone through it and how they felt about it. OMG WTF. Are you kidding me?
You made a blanket statement about a situation without (apparently) ever having experienced that situation. I'm speaking from personal experience when I say that a FWB arrangement can be beneficial and enjoyable for both parties and it can occur (and end!) without either party feeling hurt.

I didn't say that everyone has the capability to do as I did. But you pretty much made the sweeping generalization that "one party always gets hurt" which is patently incorrect. It may be the case with the limited contact you've had with FWB situations, but you can't paint everyone with that brush.
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Old 10-30-2009, 02:02 PM
 
19,425 posts, read 12,071,238 times
Reputation: 26145
This is fairly common with some of the people I know from outside the U.S. where people have different attitudes about sex. Here we have an more of an ownership mentality.
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Old 10-30-2009, 04:32 PM
 
Location: Silicon Valley
850 posts, read 1,543,154 times
Reputation: 712
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mercury Cougar View Post
You made a blanket statement about a situation without (apparently) ever having experienced that situation. I'm speaking from personal experience when I say that a FWB arrangement can be beneficial and enjoyable for both parties and it can occur (and end!) without either party feeling hurt.

I didn't say that everyone has the capability to do as I did. But you pretty much made the sweeping generalization that "one party always gets hurt" which is patently incorrect. It may be the case with the limited contact you've had with FWB situations, but you can't paint everyone with that brush.
That was your assumption plain and simple, when I wasn't talking about You or the masses (so quit reading into this already ), I just made a simple comment based on some personal friends that have experienced it. If that is how you took it, sorry. How about this, lets end this now?
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Old 10-30-2009, 05:22 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,558,052 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamajane View Post
This is fairly common with some of the people I know from outside the U.S. where people have different attitudes about sex. Here we have an more of an ownership mentality.

What do you mean?
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Old 10-30-2009, 06:29 PM
 
Location: Norwood, MN
1,828 posts, read 3,779,873 times
Reputation: 907
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joseph Marnix View Post
I'm just curious how a Friends With Benefit work.
Do they just make it a scheduled thing, say once a month.
Or is it more like spontaneous, hit or miss call if one is available?
When I had my FWB, if the stairs up to my bedroom started creaking about 1 in the morning, I knew that my friend ------ was coming to see me and we were going to have some fun that night.
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Old 10-30-2009, 10:04 PM
 
Location: Texas
8,064 posts, read 17,967,128 times
Reputation: 3729
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamajane View Post
This is fairly common with some of the people I know from outside the U.S. where people have different attitudes about sex. Here we have an more of an ownership mentality.
Exactly.

And what's weird is that Americans, in particular, reveal archaic and odd thoughts about sex whenever they speak of it. Look around here and see how many ridiculous synonyms are used for "having sex" or "making love."

Referring to something natural as "doing the nasty" or "banging" reveals major issues and hangups. I guess that's why they can't imagine anyone having legitimate and beautiful sex without a license to do so!
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Old 10-30-2009, 11:05 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 87,993,162 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by teatime View Post
Referring to something natural as "doing the nasty" or "banging" reveals major issues and hangups.
I think so, too. It's really disturbing and off-putting.
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Old 10-31-2009, 01:09 AM
 
Location: Ostend,Belgium....
8,827 posts, read 7,306,597 times
Reputation: 4949
nothing nasty about sex, unless it's with animals or kids (they can't consent), etc,. ...nevermind, different thread..
Didn't we have a thread here at one time about FWB? and the thing that was said was that both have to be in complete agreement, otherwise someone gets hurt or feels their feelings are ignored.
It's to each his own and if two or more consenting adults are happy with it, so be it... but when one develops feelings and wants to live together and have a serious relationship, it could cause a problem.
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