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I wonder if the reality of that genitals should be "eliminated" or become "non-functional", then lets see how you all will "survive" without that "meeting".
Ummm. what makes you think that they can't be taught? What is it they do wrong?
This isn't about me but I disagree. Some people simply cannot or will not be taught. If they could or would, I think there would be less infidelity and divorce.
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Originally Posted by undertheironsea
A man ending a relationship because of "bad sex" just sounds unrealistic to me.
Any sex is good sex. All we really need is friction.
I do feel it seems shallow to end a relationship over bad/no sex, but perfunctory sex? We can do that alone, no marriage license needed.
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And no wonder we have a 50% divorce rate in the country. This one thing and you end an otherwise loving relationship? (Assuming all other factors are fine.) Ridiculous. If you want something better, tell your partner and work at it. Practice until you get it right. Quitters.
This one thing is a big deal and it covers all kinds of issues, from being a prude to losing interest all together. Telling your partner does not mean it will happen and it takes two to practice. When the other is not willing, which was the point of my original post, what would you do? Do you do for better or worse and stay in a sexless marriage, do you cheat or do you walk away when everything else is great.
Choc, I would ask for some clarification from you about problems in the sex department.
Is your question about lack of sex or bad technique? Seems to me they are different things (though they could be related, of course). It also seems to me that the answer of how you deal with this sex problem depends upon the nature of the problem.
Setting aside the matter of lack of sex (since that seems to be the most oft-discussed issue here at CD), I wonder what the origins of the bad technique are. Is the lackluster partner sincerely trying but just not able to get it right? Are they willing but just generally apathetic toward it all? Or are they simply unwilling to try or do anything but the most routine and/or basic acts?
I suppose what I am asking is this: if the question is about bad technique, what is/are the origin(s) of this technique problem? This will, I think, go a long way to helping to identify a reasonable response to the problem.
I think you have to weigh your priorities early on in the relationship. If bad sex is something you can't compromise on in the long term, then you can either try to communicate your needs with your partner and hope that it sparks some inspiration in your partner, or move on. In most cases you are either sexually compatible or you aren't, and depending on your patience, teaching them can either be lot's of fun or burdensome. I think the more you like someone, the more you are willing to overlook some of their shortcomings and work with them. However, if you already see signs that this person may not be "the one" then bad sex is only going to push you closer to seeking out someone else.
For a woman, the best sex comes when you are comfortable within your own skin. When you have that, she can you offer the most passionate, mind blowing sex ever. It starts at the brain though. Not all women are intense sexual creatures.
Now for some women, they just are not wired to want/enjoy sex. Never have, never will...add children to that equation and it's even worse.
Alot of factors can be considered but I would not throw away an otherwise great relationship on the basis they are not a good lover.
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