Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Wow, I really don't get half of the responders on this thread, regardless of their gender... Do you think all of you were planned?! Those of you who do have children, were they all planned to the second?!
I'm generally not one to suggest marriage due to conception alone, but my opinion varies on a case-to-case basis. Here we have a long and solid relationship, people who love each other, and people who want to have a child. Just because it happened to be conceived a little earlier than planned is not a reason to either wreck the relationship or kill the baby. Having an abortion is not like taking an aspirin. Sometimes it results in inability to ever have a child.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sophialee
ITA. The nonchalant attitude towards abortion is disturbing and disgusting.
Plus he already said it isn't an option.
I agree with these. Good grief. None of you know these people and you are telling this guy to get a DNA test or an abortion??? Nuts!
They've been in a relationship for a while and are best friends on top of that. Maybe they don't need to get married right away, but it sounds to me like there's a good foundation for a relationship and having a child together, and that shouldn't be thrown away because of a few doubts at the beginning. I know plenty of people who had kids "by accident" and they went on to have 20 - 50 year marriages, 'til death did they part, including my grandparents.
I typically would never advise anyone to get married simply because you got the girl pregnant. That in itself is not a good reason. But given the fact that you two have been best friends for three years, dating for 6 months and love one another, I'd say you have the perfect foundation to take it a step further and consider marriage. You've decribed everything a person could want in a spouse...best friend, love, and respect. It's a huge step, but so is parenthood, and if you love one another and are truly friends, you owe it to your child to provide him/her with a loving household that consists of a full time mommy and daddy.
One thing you can anticipate, having a child will change things, however, if you truly love one another then you will face those challenges together as a team and love your child unconditionally as most parents do. Based on what you've shared, I'd say go for it!
Doesn't Coolhand give the best advice??!! I love this answe...I totally agree....what more could you want?
1,2,3. Yes
4. Business doing pretty amazing so my financial condition is in order. My folks also just inherit their home to me so i got the home section covered
5. I'll try to do my best
6. We can talk almost about everything, we were (and still until now) bestfriend for 3 years.
7. Yes
I appreciate your advice
The point of the questions wasn't so you could quickly post a reply - the point of them was to give you a starting place to think about things. This is a BIG decision, and you really need to take the time to think about these things, as well as the hundreds of other questions that haven't been brought up yet.
It sounds like you two are in a pretty good place - which is awesome! But, if there is any doubt in your mind as to what to do, figure out what specifically that doubt is and see if it's valid or not. Thing is, just take the time to make sure that you'll make the right decision.. Nobody knows the future, but if you really spend time on this, you can get a pretty good idea of what the future holds.
Taking into consideration how long you've known her and that you enjoy being together, I think that you should propose. Give your child the benefits of living in a two parent household. If you and her love and respect each other, this family unit beats single parenthood any day. You and her already have a nice foundation and you're both old enough to marry. It sounds like the two of you can make it work if you want to make it work and having a baby with someone that you love that you've known for a long time, is the perfect reason.
My girlfriend just told me that she's 6 weeks pregnant.
Should i propose to her ?
I have doubts because marriage is a huge step and divorce isn't something i want
We've been best friends for 3 years and started dating about 6 months ago
I love her and it's been really amazing but marriage is a huge step
If you were me ,what would you do ?
There was a really shocking article in New York Times Magazine a week ago about how 3 in 10 men are unwittingly raising children that aren't theirs; in most cases, it's women who conceived while cheating on a bf she wasn't married with.
I'd strongly suggest waiting until the child is born and getting a DNA test until proposing.
Wow, I really don't get half of the responders on this thread, regardless of their gender... Do you think all of you were planned?! Those of you who do have children, were they all planned to the second?!
I only have one child and yes she was planned. Ive never gotten anyone pregnant in my life until then. I always used protection and never believed a woman who said "Im on the pill so its okay". So, IMO, I am one of the smart ones. Luck has nothing to do with it. Its being smart about things.
I still say they guy should sit down with this girl, discuss ALL options available to them, and really take a long hard look at their lives before committing to having this child. And ESPECIALLY DO NOT GET MARRIED JUST BECAUSE SHE'S PREGNANT. That would be incredibly stupid. He should not get married just because of what HER family says or is like or because of what HIS family says or is like because you are not marrying the family your marrying the woman.
Propose her...to an appointment at Planned Parenthood.
No marriage. No baby.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Do you think all of you were planned?! Those of you who do have children, were they all planned to the second?!
