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You are 20 years old and you should be meeting lots of men. When you do that you will know a good man from a bad one. Start crap testing them too. You are wasting time with this one.
In my day, I rejected early and rejected often. It usually did not even get to dating because I was done with those 3-4 year serial monogamous relationships.
Your boyfriend is a budding alcoholic. And since alcoholism is a progressive disease, his behavior will continue to erode when he drinks, which will be more and more frequent as the years pass, unless he sees the writing on the wall and decides to quit drinking. Take it from me, I'm a recovering alcoholic who drank hard for 20 years--I've been sober almost six years now. But the behavior you described in your post was all too familar to me, I've been there myself. You can write off thanksgiving as an isolated instance. Then, oh maybe around new year's eve, you'll be witnessing another display of irrational actions and on Jan. 1 will be scratching your head trying to justify or excuse that episode. Tis will continue, ad nauseam.
My advice no doubt sounds harsh, but that's only because I've seen the destructiion caused by alcoholism. In fact, I did my share of it, going through many girlfriends during my drinking days, who, like you, at first tried to excuse my behavior until there were no more excuses to be had.
Best of luck.
Let's review, "I'm a jerk. I act badly. I hurt people. But I love you, you are the only girl for me." ... Why do women fall for that crap? You think he is "meant" for you? Why assume that you are meant to be with someone who acts this way? Is that all you are worth? Maybe someone good is meant for you. Think about this.
You are young. I frankly don't have any idea what the real problem is.
1. Clearly he is an ugly drunk. That behavior will only get worse as time goes by. I promise! Violence is right around the corner.
2. I don't think 2 only children are ever a good match. Birth order is very important in how people interact.
3. Your not even married and he is fighting with your Mother!?!?! You have got to be kidding.
He is clearly treating you and your family like a pack of rats.
... all this and you are trying to "understand".
You are being played.
Drop this guy like a rock.
I'm sorry this happened. It's going to be very difficult to learn to live apart from him but I truly feel you must. It's your life. Don't live it this way.
Best wishes, my friend.
And did he remember to tell you, it's your fault he acted like he did? Or your mom's fault. Or the dog's fault. Another boozer who can't accept responsibility for his own actions. He's just the innocent victim who was driven into acting inappropriately.
Please don't take these replies lightly.
We've all been through it or seen it too closely to describe.
We're not just off-handedly saying "dump him".
We have your safety and best interest at heart.
This young, and so soon into a relationship? He ain't changing no time soon.
Please don't take these replies lightly.
We've all been through it or seen it too closely to describe.
We're not just off-handedly saying "dump him".
We have your safety and best interest at heart.
This young, and so soon into a relationship? He ain't changing no time soon.
What this poster said.
You keep going and you will lose time--years even--that you can never get back.
please don't take these replies lightly.
We've all been through it or seen it too closely to describe.
We're not just off-handedly saying "dump him".
We have your safety and best interest at heart.
This young, and so soon into a relationship? He ain't changing no time soon.
bingo.
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