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Old 12-08-2009, 08:22 PM
 
519 posts, read 1,049,540 times
Reputation: 709

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Run away!
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:24 PM
 
20,716 posts, read 19,357,373 times
Reputation: 8280
You are 20 years old and you should be meeting lots of men. When you do that you will know a good man from a bad one. Start crap testing them too. You are wasting time with this one.

In my day, I rejected early and rejected often. It usually did not even get to dating because I was done with those 3-4 year serial monogamous relationships.
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:27 PM
 
Location: Rockwall
677 posts, read 1,538,413 times
Reputation: 1129
Let me see if I have this right.

He is drunk and is rude/disrespectful to your Mother and you.

The next day he is SOBER??, calls to apologize to your Mother only to be rude/disrespectful AGAIN. Or was he drunk again??

Then, he presents you with a litany of reasons (which, btw, are actually lame ass excuses) for this character flaw.

??????

Bottom line, he's a mean drunk. Do you want to live like this?? A few drinks=bad behavior=hurt feelings=a sad way to live.
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:34 PM
 
Location: Ostend,Belgium....
8,827 posts, read 7,327,366 times
Reputation: 4949
it can get worse and you'll be his next victim, he's a mean drunk. get out before you really get in too deep, he can't even apologize properly....
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:38 PM
 
Location: Austin, Texas
2,754 posts, read 6,100,489 times
Reputation: 4669
Your boyfriend is a budding alcoholic. And since alcoholism is a progressive disease, his behavior will continue to erode when he drinks, which will be more and more frequent as the years pass, unless he sees the writing on the wall and decides to quit drinking. Take it from me, I'm a recovering alcoholic who drank hard for 20 years--I've been sober almost six years now. But the behavior you described in your post was all too familar to me, I've been there myself. You can write off thanksgiving as an isolated instance. Then, oh maybe around new year's eve, you'll be witnessing another display of irrational actions and on Jan. 1 will be scratching your head trying to justify or excuse that episode. Tis will continue, ad nauseam.
My advice no doubt sounds harsh, but that's only because I've seen the destructiion caused by alcoholism. In fact, I did my share of it, going through many girlfriends during my drinking days, who, like you, at first tried to excuse my behavior until there were no more excuses to be had.
Best of luck.
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:42 PM
 
Location: Colorado Springs, CO
1,570 posts, read 5,986,546 times
Reputation: 1405
Let's review, "I'm a jerk. I act badly. I hurt people. But I love you, you are the only girl for me." ... Why do women fall for that crap? You think he is "meant" for you? Why assume that you are meant to be with someone who acts this way? Is that all you are worth? Maybe someone good is meant for you. Think about this.

You are young. I frankly don't have any idea what the real problem is.
1. Clearly he is an ugly drunk. That behavior will only get worse as time goes by. I promise! Violence is right around the corner.
2. I don't think 2 only children are ever a good match. Birth order is very important in how people interact.
3. Your not even married and he is fighting with your Mother!?!?! You have got to be kidding.
He is clearly treating you and your family like a pack of rats.
... all this and you are trying to "understand".
You are being played.
Drop this guy like a rock.
I'm sorry this happened. It's going to be very difficult to learn to live apart from him but I truly feel you must. It's your life. Don't live it this way.
Best wishes, my friend.
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:52 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas
14,229 posts, read 30,028,651 times
Reputation: 27688
And did he remember to tell you, it's your fault he acted like he did? Or your mom's fault. Or the dog's fault. Another boozer who can't accept responsibility for his own actions. He's just the innocent victim who was driven into acting inappropriately.

Right!
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Old 12-08-2009, 08:56 PM
 
Location: Florida
1,313 posts, read 1,550,918 times
Reputation: 462
Girl,

Please don't take these replies lightly.
We've all been through it or seen it too closely to describe.
We're not just off-handedly saying "dump him".
We have your safety and best interest at heart.
This young, and so soon into a relationship? He ain't changing no time soon.

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Old 12-08-2009, 09:02 PM
 
Location: Elsewhere
88,564 posts, read 84,755,078 times
Reputation: 115063
Quote:
Originally Posted by hortysir View Post
Girl,

Please don't take these replies lightly.
We've all been through it or seen it too closely to describe.
We're not just off-handedly saying "dump him".
We have your safety and best interest at heart.
This young, and so soon into a relationship? He ain't changing no time soon.

What this poster said.

You keep going and you will lose time--years even--that you can never get back.
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Old 12-08-2009, 09:11 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,712,871 times
Reputation: 40199
Quote:
Originally Posted by hortysir View Post
girl,

please don't take these replies lightly.
We've all been through it or seen it too closely to describe.
We're not just off-handedly saying "dump him".
We have your safety and best interest at heart.
This young, and so soon into a relationship? He ain't changing no time soon.



bingo.
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