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There is a difference between someone who needs support at times and someone who is all doom and gloom and is never ever happy and all the will do is complain. Which one is your friend OP?
She was there last night. Turns out her boyfriend, the one in the thread above, dumped her a couple of weeks ago (long overdue, IMO). Well, a few drinks into the night, she becomes this pathetic hag just full of self-pity and entitlement. By the time the ball dropped, she was complaining how everyone left her alone at the bar, nobody cares about her and everyone hates her. As I write this, I think I could easily be talking about a 10 year old. She's 40. How does she not understand how much of a turn off that is?
It made me think of all the people I have met in my life who were angry, obnoxious drunks. Every single one was insecure, unhappy or has an otherwise unfulfilling life. A buzz-kill, every single one of them.
I don't really have any questions, this is more of a rant, but feel free to contribute your thoughts and experiences.
You are complaining about people complaining.
Not everyone is peachy and happy in life, especially @ this time of year. It is an extremely lonely time for many people and many (unfortunately) turn to drink to drown their sorrows. As for you, you might benefit from at least a bit more compassion and understanding, rather than seeing people who are going through tough times as "buzz-kills".
When you go out to party with friends especially on NYE, you leave your troubles at home and try to have a good time. That's the point of being out with friends. I think it is selfish for someone to use such an inappropriate time to have a pity party. It makes people not want to lend a shoulder at some other more fitting time. The thing is, people like this won't call when they are not drunk and not the center of attention.
Last edited by thriftylefty; 01-02-2010 at 08:59 AM..
I can understand your position. I can't stand people who are buzz-killers when you are out having a celebration of good tidings for a new year. Then you have someone who has decided to come out, have a few drinks and wallow in their self-pity hoping to drag you into the pit with them. No thanks!
There is a time and place for airing grievances and NYE, around a crowd of people drinking was not it! Next time you are in this situation, have fun with it. Tell them, yes, you agree no one likes them and to show your love, you are going to send them on an all expense paid vacation to Iraq.
Also some people seem to like being unhappy, they like to think about themselves, they like feeling sorry for themselves, they don't want to change even if you point out to them that being negative is hurting them socially. Maybe it's the way they were raised or something. Maybe feeling sad provides them a very good excuse to over-drink and that's what they really want to do.
I think you have a frienemy on your hands. She will meet another guy and the scenario repeats itself. What is there about her that gets her included in the group? Sounds like she needs some lessons in self confidence.
I agree with everyone who said that you are not her real friend. You shouldn't turn your back on people when they are down, because the same thing will hpnd to you when you really need support from your friends, they will turn their back on you sorta like what your doing to her.
Some of us really need to learn how to love, that is what the world is missing, no wonder why it's so screwed!!
I agree with everyone who said that you are not her real friend. You shouldn't turn your back on people when they are down, because the same thing will hpnd to you when you really need support from your friends, they will turn their back on you sorta like what your doing to her.
Some of us really need to learn how to love, that is what the world is missing, no wonder why it's so screwed!!
Not at a party. Others go to the party to celebrate, have some fun. They didn't go to be brought down by some feel-sorry-for-herself type. I don't think anyone owed her a sad time crying with her over herself.
She should have gone with the intention of having a good time. If her life is such a mess, then she should pay to see a therapist or something, but not try to ruin everyone's fun.
I agree with everyone who said that you are not her real friend. You shouldn't turn your back on people when they are down, because the same thing will hpnd to you when you really need support from your friends, they will turn their back on you sorta like what your doing to her.
Some of us really need to learn how to love, that is what the world is missing, no wonder why it's so screwed!!
No where in her post did she say she was her friend and if you looked at the back story on this woman through the link she posted in her OP then you may have more information to which to base your opinion.
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Next time you are in this situation, have fun with it. Tell them, yes, you agree no one likes them and to show your love, you are going to send them on an all expense paid vacation to Iraq. 
