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It means you choose to be lonely and bored, develop some interests, develop your mind, develop your body...
a. Get a hobby. (I do whatever I can)
b. Go work out, get a personal trainer if you're not motivated. (I'm working on a house)
c. Take a Yoga class, kickboxing, pilates... (I'd love to take Kendo)
d. Read a book. (Sword of Demons)
e. Get a dog. (Tried once before)
f. Start a business. (In the process with a buddy (porn))
g. Take dance lessons, singing lessons, tennis lessons, golf lessons, flying lessons... (I can't get access to anywhere that gives these)
h. Volunteer at your local animal shelter to walk dogs or to socialize with the cats (you think you're lonely try living in a cage alone all your life!) (I have great sympathy for those animals but there aren't any around here)
i. Get a part-time job. (No one is hiring)
j. Volunteer at the Salvation Army (I don't know where they are)
k. Join a dating service (I got no satisfaction out of it)
l. All of the above!
I'm sorry for shooting these out of the air... mostly.
Your number one problem is trying to find yourself in someone else. When you don't know who YOU are, and you define yourself by your relationship, you will have nothing when the relationship is over and be lonely everytime.
The best thing you can do for yourself is define who you are as an individual so when you are not in a relationship you don't lose yourself along with it. You are very young. Please learn who you are before trying to have a real relationship. A lot of relationship problems are caused because people get together when they don't know who they are and wake-up one day and feel like they've missed out on life. That's because they have. Knowing who you are and being able to define you is the best gift you can give yourself.
Knowing who you are will give you self-confidence and self-confidence is a major turn-on.
To I'm The Supporter;
You are a people person, but the thing you have to remember is you are young! You have your whole life ahead of you! I can understand your need for travel. If you feel like you need a change of pace, go for it! But I urge you to do your reserch first. You just need to go and grab life by the horns. As for feeling lonely, you need to find and love yourself before you can find love with someone else. Learn to become content with yourself. Find an inner peace. I know it's not as easy as it sounds (belive me, I know), but you will be happier in the long run. The best of luck to you though.
You're 20! This is the make it or break it when it comes to independence. If you feel like you need to be with someone to maintain equilibrium then you will continue like that and may miss out on the love of your life because you're always the girlfriend guy.
I think I've already missed the train. I won't settle. I hate settling with a passion. I did have one girl. She actually did balance me very well. And out of all of her boyfriends that she brought home her family liked me and only me. But one day, she calls me up saying 'I need space'. A few weeks later she is talking about her new boyfriend within 10 feet of me. This threw me into the darkest depression I've ever been in. The kind of depression where if you look at a bullet in the camp fire and try to see when it would explode, you won't know it until it's already gone off. I was then patched up and the girl who did that just before Christmas this past year said that she doesn't want to be with me again.
I think I've already missed the train. I won't settle. I hate settling with a passion. I did have one girl. She actually did balance me very well. And out of all of her boyfriends that she brought home her family liked me and only me. But one day, she calls me up saying 'I need space'. A few weeks later she is talking about her new boyfriend within 10 feet of me. This threw me into the darkest depression I've ever been in. The kind of depression where if you look at a bullet in the camp fire and try to see when it would explode, you won't know it until it's already gone off. I was then patched up and the girl who did that just before Christmas this past year said that she doesn't want to be with me again.
No matter what it isn't the end of the world. Life goes on, you just have to decide if you are going to watch it pass you by, or are you going to live it to the fullest?
Maybe you just need a hobby and figure out how to be happy alone.
I've noticed that many people who can't stand being single, don't know how to just be happy alone and end up being in one of those co-dependent relationships.
If you can't do that then I highly doubt being in a relationship will make that loneliness/relentlessness go away.
You know, the one thing I have always wanted ever since I can remember is to have a family of my own. A wife and two little girls (I wouldn't be able to raise a son). If y'all want to know more about the situation I would be more than happy to fill you in. One of my favorite things to do is get to know who a person is. That's why I don't like forums so much is because you HAVE to be anonymous and you can't share information like e-mail or anything. So you don't make friends.
Maybe you just need a hobby and figure out how to be happy alone.
I've noticed that many people who can't stand being single, don't know how to just be happy alone and end up being in one of those co-dependent relationships.
If you can't do that then I highly doubt being in a relationship will make that loneliness/relentlessness go away.
I'm a nerd. I like watching anime, reading manga, cosplaying, Star Wars, and trust me, if I can go out into a crowded place looking like a "fruity Japanese guy from some cartoon" and not blush, or walk up to random people (especially women), start and hold a conversation, self confidence is in my palm.
Ah, and this is where faith comes in. Relationships end and they chip away at your heart, but you have to believe that everything happens for a reason. You have to keep breathing and you have to try to become the best kind of person you can be, so that when fate steps in and you find who you're meant to be with you're ready for her.
Focus on becoming the person you want to be (in all aspects of life). Maybe when you are single you dwell too much on the miserable past when you should be looking forward - maybe that is why you are a "colder" person when you're single?
I don't really know. But there is an aspect that could be a cause. I don't actually see anything in my future. I just go one day at a time. I gave up on looking years ahead a long time ago.
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