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Old 05-23-2007, 02:22 PM
 
Location: Tampa baby!!
3,258 posts, read 8,444,772 times
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I have often wondered how I would handle this if I ever got divorced. How do you all think this effects kids opinions of relationships. Is it ok for them to see multiple guys and girls come and go over the years? Do you think it's ok for the people to stay overnight with your kids in the same house?

I would love opinions on this one.
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Old 05-23-2007, 02:28 PM
 
283 posts, read 1,315,271 times
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NO! It isn't ok for the kids to be exposed to how promiscious adult relationships can be.
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Old 05-23-2007, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,878,683 times
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I would not because I don't want my daughter exposed to someone before I know what they are all about...I know her, she would get her hopes up as well...then what if the person turns out to be an idiot...

There is someone I used to work with, we have been friends ever since, I would LOVE to go out with him and I already know how he is with my daughter and that he likes children in general because of our interaction at work. I geuss thats the best of both worlds.
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Old 05-23-2007, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Vancouver, Canada
550 posts, read 2,699,162 times
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I didn't introduce my son (4 at the time) to my husband until 2 1/2 months into the relationship. I don't think kids should see relationships coming and going. That is not a nice memory for the child. "My mom had guys coming and going for a few years and then she married my step dad". That is not a nice image. Always put your kids and their feelings first.
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Old 05-23-2007, 07:24 PM
 
Location: Tampa baby!!
3,258 posts, read 8,444,772 times
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The reason I asked this is because I have known people at both ends of the spectrum. Some who didn't introduce their kids to a guy/girl until they are actually talking marriage, and some who bring them home right away and they even sleep over in the parents bed.

I think I would be very protective of this. Especially with all the wierdos out there. Some of them actually date single parents to get easy access to their kids. Sad to say, but true.
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Old 05-24-2007, 08:16 AM
 
140 posts, read 512,109 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by floridadreamer View Post
The reason I asked this is because I have known people at both ends of the spectrum. Some who didn't introduce their kids to a guy/girl until they are actually talking marriage, and some who bring them home right away and they even sleep over in the parents bed.

I think I would be very protective of this. Especially with all the wierdos out there. Some of them actually date single parents to get easy access to their kids. Sad to say, but true.

That's one of the reasons I have chosen to stay single for now. I'm so scared of some guy trying to molest my son that I have not really encouraged relationship with anyone. I don't want to have to go to jail for murder, because that's what would happen if anybody hurt my baby. I will start dating again, however, but I will not bring him around my son until I have checked him out and our relationship becomes serious.
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Old 05-24-2007, 08:55 AM
 
Location: Chattanooga TN
2,349 posts, read 10,079,207 times
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Good choice film. I absolutely would not bring a person into my home until it is serious. These children form bonds w/people so easily and who wants a broken heart every 6 months? Now on the flip side, we will occasionally attend events that include our whole extended family and a "friend" but those are mostly daytime excursions and NO overnights PERIOD! Not that I have overnights BUT if I did.... LOL
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Old 06-07-2007, 03:52 AM
 
Location: Orlando Florida
1,352 posts, read 6,008,914 times
Reputation: 418
i think you should wait a little bit before you introduce your kids but dont expect that the person will stay with you in some situations because i went through this and it took time to learn that my ex-girlfriend and son were not raised in the manner i was and i just couldnt continue to be with her because she wasnt going to punish her child for telling her "no" and he would run around on the waiting seats in resturants and pull the movie ropes until the poles would almost fall and not know he had to put seat belt on in my car and when his mom told him he would just keep playing his PSP.


he was 8 years old but raised with getting his wants because his mom didnt want him to be sad or feel bad and i was raised with priorities and order so there was a difference there.....


Well it takes time to know how the children are raised by that person you care about so of coarse someone will be hurt but just end it as soon as you see the differences and if theres no compromises along with that......


ultimatley you have to wait to introduce them to see if the person your with is ok and then there will be another waiting period for that person to see if he/she agrees with how you raise your children and if theres disagreement and no action or comprimise then it has to end...
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Old 06-07-2007, 07:34 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles
644 posts, read 3,201,901 times
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Nice to see all these parents who are so protective of their kids.
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Old 06-07-2007, 09:03 AM
 
Location: California
11,459 posts, read 18,204,295 times
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I wouldn't wait until your thinking of getting married, I would want to see ahead of time what the other persons reactions are, if the other person doesn't accept the children 100% then it wont work out. I see it with some of my relitives they don't talk well of their soon to be step children, it wont work out. You need to be up front with what you expect in a relationship when you have children.
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