would you continue dating someone even if the sex was lousy? (boyfriend, long-term)
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I wouldn't stay in a relationship if the sex was bad. However it does take time to have develop a good sex life. Before you call it quits, give it the 'ol college try! Be a teacher ... an education is never a waste!
Have fun.
Sex is a form of communication. Not sure about you, but the last thing I would want to say to someone I just started having sex with would be, "Hey. You. Ya, you. You're quite the little underachiever in bed. Follow my lead next time, eh." Not many people want to wait it out and play teacher and pupil. More times than not, the first couple of times we have sex with someone, we're not much in sync with each other anyway [nerves, performance anxiety, not used to each others bodies, movements, etc.] and it develops from there on. At least give her a chance.
I don't know though - you mentioned 2+ hours of foreplay [wtf?]. . . I want to slap you upside your head for not going in for the kill much sooner - and in her defense, perhaps she was just frozen in shock that you finally did.
hehe everyone seems surprised at the 2+ hrs foreplay comment. actually beleive me i was trying to get her into bed much sooner than that. after about 45 mins or so i almost gave up. i was glad that she finally even agreed haha. maybe she just wasn't that much into it. i dunno.
I have two thoughts. First yes to a certain degree you should be a little more patient and help teach her some things. My second thought this is more or less how I feel. I'm turning 40 in Feb. I'm quite well versed in great sex not only how to please myself but also my b/f. At my age, I don't want to any longer be the teacher. If my b/f I and I broke up, I wouldn't want to take on a lover who was boring. I'd want the same level of expertise as me and my b/f or it would be a deal breaker for me.
Again, just a thought and trying to show it from an age perspective (not sure how old the OP is though)
Send her to a 3 day seminar at Mr. Cat's Sex School. No registration fee, lots of hands on training done by it's only teacher, Certified Master Sexologist Mr. Cat himself. Act now, beds are limited!
well, i've been seeing this girl for a few weeks now and the sex has been utterly lousy and un-satisfying. i've been with women much younger and much older than her as well and have had significantly better experiences. we get along great and she's an amazingly nice person...but she just doesn't know how to have a good time in the sack!
what would you do in a situation like this?
EDIT: the problem is that basically she just lies there, even though i know she's aroused after 2+ hrs of foreplay! i have to be really pro-active with her when trying different things...maybe i should rent a porno and watch it with her, haha!
As others have mentioned, be her teacher (she might have never had a good lover before, or she might not realize the possibilities, or lastly she might just not know herself/be willing to let herself go). If the situation doesn't get better, then decide what you want to do (for her sake though, don't string her along if you're truly unsatisfied).
Lastly, don't do the porno idea - porno isn't realistic nor loving - she needs to learn to make love, not just to have sex.
That is a throw-back. Life is too short to commit to having bad sexual experiences.
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