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Old 01-12-2010, 12:09 PM
 
Location: California
440 posts, read 966,860 times
Reputation: 435

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Do you feel like you can go to your SO about anything? I guess I'm just in a curious mood haha so I'm asking questions that pop into my head from other posts.

So is there anything you dont feel like you can go to your spouse about?

I dont know that I could be with someone who I couldn't be completely open with.

What about you?
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Old 01-12-2010, 12:33 PM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 13,874,419 times
Reputation: 3754
You should always be able to talk to your SO about anything but, there are some things that you may not want to talk to him orher about. In those instances that's what family and friends are for. Maybe if more people talked to their SO's, relationships would last longer.
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Old 01-12-2010, 12:42 PM
 
Location: California
440 posts, read 966,860 times
Reputation: 435
Quote:
Originally Posted by andreaspercheron View Post
You should always be able to talk to your SO about anything but, there are some things that you may not want to talk to him orher about. In those instances that's what family and friends are for. Maybe if more people talked to their SO's, relationships would last longer.
Exactly my point!
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Old 01-12-2010, 12:47 PM
 
9,912 posts, read 13,128,434 times
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There's not really anything I don't want him to know HOWEVER I have to say that there are some conversations that are incredibly difficult to have and I can't say I'm in a big rush to have them.

If it comes up, it does. If it doesn't, well that wouldn't bother me either.
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Old 01-12-2010, 02:22 PM
 
Location: Way up north :-)
3,039 posts, read 5,579,162 times
Reputation: 2944
Hi Moon! *waves*.

If I dont do well at something, my silly pride might stop me from saying anything about it...to anyone really. But I'll say something to people at work for example, whereas I'm, shall we say, less anxious for my SO to find out about it.
Uni results for instance, if I do well, I tell him first. If not, as Moonshadow said, I'll see if it comes up.
Stuff like that is more about how you feel yourself rather than a fear of how your SO will react.

I agree though, communication is everything. It sounds simple but it's not always an easy tool to use, sometimes because its the very person who means more to you than anything in the world.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:37 AM
 
Location: Bon Temps
1,743 posts, read 4,316,999 times
Reputation: 1837
I can't talk to my husband about anything that really matters usually. All of my concerns seem to be either; pointless, stupid, irrelevant, or just fall into the "grow up" category. For example, (I know I can get hysterical), but yes I had a horrible panic attack one day and honestly thought I was not going to live to see the next day. I tried to tell him about what I felt, and just needed somebody to talk to. He would not listen, he was just more like, I really want to watch TV kind of an attitude. I can have a bad day at work, I come home and say something about it, all I get is the just be thankful you have a job speech.

After years of this, I do not see any point in communication.
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Old 01-13-2010, 05:48 AM
 
Location: Incognito
7,005 posts, read 19,911,105 times
Reputation: 5490
When I was with my ex I confided on her for any little thing that would happen to me. Too bad she didn't feel the same way about me.
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Old 01-13-2010, 08:12 AM
 
Location: New York, NY
917 posts, read 2,781,584 times
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Hehe, I tell my BF EVERYTHING and he tells me everything he'd actually tell another person. He's a pretty quiet guy and I talk a lot, so it works. I am the one person he tells important things to, and we've never had an actual fight. We've had many many discussions, but we communicate well and so far it's done us a lot of good. I have dated guys I didn't feel I could really talk to and none of those lasted.
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Old 01-13-2010, 08:33 AM
 
9,912 posts, read 13,128,434 times
Reputation: 7328
Quote:
Originally Posted by jacq63 View Post
Hi Moon! *waves*.

If I dont do well at something, my silly pride might stop me from saying anything about it...to anyone really. But I'll say something to people at work for example, whereas I'm, shall we say, less anxious for my SO to find out about it.
Uni results for instance, if I do well, I tell him first. If not, as Moonshadow said, I'll see if it comes up.
Stuff like that is more about how you feel yourself rather than a fear of how your SO will react.

I agree though, communication is everything. It sounds simple but it's not always an easy tool to use, sometimes because its the very person who means more to you than anything in the world.
Hi jacqs! **waves back**

I agree, pride can get in the way.(AND IT DOES! )
I was thinking more about past experiences and traumas though. There are things that have shaped my life and who I am today, so they're relevant to him NOW, however they are things I prefer NOT to think about and actually trying to get the words out to explain them? Forget it!
I become a bumbling, simpering mess WHICH I simply cannot stand therefore I'll wait til I'm asked OR until a situation or circumstance brings the issue up.
It's not really about how I feel about myself and more to do with how I feel about those situations. There are some things that happen in life that will always be difficult to verbalize.
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Old 01-13-2010, 08:34 AM
 
9,912 posts, read 13,128,434 times
Reputation: 7328
Quote:
Originally Posted by DixieChick1972 View Post
I can't talk to my husband about anything that really matters usually. All of my concerns seem to be either; pointless, stupid, irrelevant, or just fall into the "grow up" category. For example, (I know I can get hysterical), but yes I had a horrible panic attack one day and honestly thought I was not going to live to see the next day. I tried to tell him about what I felt, and just needed somebody to talk to. He would not listen, he was just more like, I really want to watch TV kind of an attitude. I can have a bad day at work, I come home and say something about it, all I get is the just be thankful you have a job speech.

After years of this, I do not see any point in communication.
Uggh!

Sounds hideous. Sorry to hear that.
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