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Let me preface this by saying that my lifestyle doesn't make me better than anyone else. I respect the fat that most people probably don't like to exercise, and if that makes them happy, more power to them. Furthermore, a few extra pounds are certainly OK. I don't expect a greek god. Chubby is fine...but obese is not.
Me: I'm one of those people who loves to exercise. Run 40 + miles a week, and also swim, ride my bike, and go hiking. In short, I love being active, and leading a healthy lifestyle. Naturally, I'd like my partner to have some degree of compatibility in this arena...
1) A good, down to earth personality. Good character, etc, but also:
2) Someone who exercises on a regular basis, and takes care of themselves.
Unfortunately, everyone I meet lately isn't slim or chubby -- they're full-on obese, and by their own admission extremely inactive -- again, that doesn't make them bad people by any means. They're great guys, and I've become good friends with all of them. But, the stark differences in lifestyles means we can be friends, but a relationship isn't possible. One guy even told me point blank "You and I both know we're not compatible. You run a million miles a week, and I never get off the couch. I think we should just be friends."
Any advice? I don't want to join a gym, since I have a home gym already, but wondering how to meet active singles for friendship and dating.
I know that when I was living in Seattle I was very active in a singles hiking group that had tons of activities and people who are going to go on a fairly strenuous hike are generally in pretty good shape. So it depends on where you live but there are groups similar to that all over the country that are centered around such things as biking, kayaking and every sort of physical activity you can think of.
I can relate to this. I exercise regularly and believe in following a healthy lifestyle. But I work in IT, which isn't exactly full of people who are active or value their health. I don't get hit on by obese people, but it's hard to meet people who have a similar attitude about health and fitness. Like the OP, I have a home gym. People have suggested that I join a gym. But there are two reasons I'm opposed to this. One is that I much prefer working out in the privacy of my own home with no distractions. The other is that I don't think people should join a gym as a means of meeting people. If I were to join a gym, it would be to workout, not socialize. And when it comes to exercise, I prefer activities that don't require a partner or being part of a group. But I'm glad you started this thread because I think having the same attitude towards health and fitness is just as important any of the traditional dimensions of compatibility (religion, politics, etc.). Otherwise, you feel the other person is holding you back and being a bad influence. My advice would be to just focus on doing the things you're passionate about. If you enjoy running or hiking, join a running or hiking group. Meetup is great for finding these groups or you could start your own. Find out about healthy cooking classes. Chances are people who care to eat healthy also understand the importance of regular exercise. Go to a farmer's market or more health-conscious places and I think you'll meet more fitness-minded people.
Let me preface this by saying that my lifestyle doesn't make me better than anyone else. I respect the fat that most people probably don't like to exercise, and if that makes them happy, more power to them. Furthermore, a few extra pounds are certainly OK. I don't expect a greek god. Chubby is fine...but obese is not.
Me: I'm one of those people who loves to exercise. Run 40 + miles a week, and also swim, ride my bike, and go hiking. In short, I love being active, and leading a healthy lifestyle. Naturally, I'd like my partner to have some degree of compatibility in this arena...
1) A good, down to earth personality. Good character, etc, but also:
2) Someone who exercises on a regular basis, and takes care of themselves.
Unfortunately, everyone I meet lately isn't slim or chubby -- they're full-on obese, and by their own admission extremely inactive -- again, that doesn't make them bad people by any means. They're great guys, and I've become good friends with all of them. But, the stark differences in lifestyles means we can be friends, but a relationship isn't possible. One guy even told me point blank "You and I both know we're not compatible. You run a million miles a week, and I never get off the couch. I think we should just be friends."
Any advice? I don't want to join a gym, since I have a home gym already, but wondering how to meet active singles for friendship and dating.
Nothing wrong with knowing what you want and don't want. I get hit on by dorks all the time - never the real hotties, go figure.
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