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I have not read anything from the "no, no, no.." thread after I had left - nor do I care to. . I heard all I needed to hear from other members who called me on the phone to check up on me.
Would like to straight-up thank those that were supportive and understood the stress I was under and why I had not continued on in the thread. Before I had left, I took and kept much of what you said with me.
To those that did not understand and had implied that I selectively withdrew only from "CD" - and would not my own offline friends. . . simply, you do not have me pinned down very well at all. When I go into a state of solitude to think and sort - I do so almost completely. Meaning, I say I am alive when called - say little, listen a lot - and that is that. I had walked from CD to sort my head out before - for up to 6 months. If my head is an extreme fright, I am positively no good for other members here, nor to much of anyone else around me for that matter. I do know when to say "Uncle." Respect it or not, no matter to me, it is what it is.
To a very 'certain select' that stated I am with him for money because he is much older/established, etc. - hold it, I am 38, he is 50. 12 years. I make my own money. Unless you hold employment at my bank - hold your tongue and keep your assumptions out of my accounts before deeming me to chase after Human ATM's. If it were solely for his money, I would have and could have bagged him months ago. Trust that. Some people think half-baked. . . and really, it is so 2009 when people cry "green."
That is all I care to comment on in regard to the mish-mosh. Since some felt compelled to smack-talk - fair is fair, there is my say.
Moving forward. . .
It took us 2 weeks to sort things out and for him to put his lies on the table and to clear them up. It's been extremely emotionally draining and I have learned some very interesting things about the 'glue' in a relationship, myself, and him. Together we agree that we need to put more effort into better communication. I do forgive him. The engagement is back on - I have postponed it for up to a year and have given no date, however. He understands and is now humbled. He will put my ring back on my hand on Monday when he is here with me for the week. We are moving forward with repair and I have expressed to him the importance that I feel to live together before marriage, which will be done.
I will be back when my head has fully dwindled down from the spin. It'll be a week or so until I am back - I will not be checking on responses. I am burnt out, tired, and my patience is very thin.
For the record, my best friends have not yet been told that he is coming for the week because this is my first "coming out" in days. Just some food for thought for you to munch on.
See you soon.
Last edited by yankeegirl313; 03-07-2010 at 07:06 AM..
Jeep,
Good to hear back from you. I'm glad you're in a better place, and have a handle on things. I know you've made some hard decisions, but it's good to know that you're getting things resolved. We all want the best for you!
Good the hear that you're ok..you do what you have to do for you...
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