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It sounds like you have no respect at all for them, and are just seeing it as an opportunity for a fumble.
Glad I don't have friends like you.
Be not so harsh! He was simply thinking out loud and positing a scenario. His question has been answered and no doubt he'll heed the given advice. He doesn't sound like a complete idiot.
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I think if you are honest with yourself you'll realize that you weren't really buddies, you were just waiting for her to break up with her boyfriend.
If you try to create a casual sexual relationship that fun, relaxed relationship with a deep undertone of sexual tension will be gone. Either give her a real shot or keep it tucked unless you don't mind her extraction from your life.
As a girl, I'm telling you it will completely change the dynamic of your friendship in a way you probably don't want. Girls are just not wired the same way and it's much more likely (although not guaranteed) that she will develop feelings that you won't reciprocate. You'll lose your friend and the sex.
I truly don't know. She says I'm cute all of the time, but that could be just her giving me compliments as a friend. While drunk the other day she did ask, "Do you think I'm attractive" in a weird and shy kind of way. Not sure what that was all about.
Exactly. The whole thing is fraught with peril.
If she didn't say those things to you while completely sober, I'd stay away from the FWB thing...
Isolate the sentiment, and feeling, and emotion which went into the composition, and then come back and tell me I'm being harsh.
Maybe the OP has worded it incorrectly, but the word springing to my mind is "creep".
it doesn't seem to be written by someone who cares about another human, as a "friend" should. instead, a selfish person, looking to take advantage of another's vulnerability.
Sorry, I just call it as I see it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by STT Resident
Be not so harsh! He was simply thinking out loud and positing a scenario. His question has been answered and no doubt he'll heed the given advice. He doesn't sound like a complete idiot.
Isolate the sentiment, and feeling, and emotion which went into the composition, and then come back and tell me I'm being harsh.
Maybe the OP has worded it incorrectly, but the word springing to my mind is "creep".
it doesn't seem to be written by someone who cares about another human, as a "friend" should. instead, a selfish person, looking to take advantage of another's vulnerability.
Her ex-boyfriend and her seem to be on good terms. He even helped her move some things into her new place. She has been hanging out with other dudes. I know she has a new makeout buddy. She is not "vulnerable" or emotional at all.
And no, I wasn't waiting for her to break up with her boyfriend. I actually like the guy and was hoping they could work it out (which didn't happen). And, I am dead serious when I said I have not had these sexual feelings until recently. It just hit me several days ago how I wouldn't mind doing the girl. It's strange.
You need to see how things are between you and her.
I would say things like, "Any guy would be lucky to have you. Heck! I wish I could be that guy." Or something like that.
oooohhhhh---if he said that, knowing that he has already said he could never be in love with her, then feelings could be seriously hurt.
'Some' people are more resilient and if both parties assessed the risks in advance a la an episode of Seinfeld or perhaps after a viewing of 'My Best Friend's Wedding' --then possibly this is doable.
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