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I don't know that I would automatically rule someone out of consideration because of a few words in an email that should probably have been left out. Based on what you've told us I'd give the guy a chance and try to get a better feel for his motivations and personality. It might turn out that he's actually a great guy.
Yeah...and my email back to him, honestly, would probably ask him just that. I'm pretty open and frank when I talk to these guys. If they say something a bit "off", I'm going to call them on it. So I'd ask him....why would he say that? Is that his usual "line"? Is he new to this? In other words...give me your story, dude...and then we can talk.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mathguy
Don't read too much into some preliminary emails. You seem interested enough to want to investigate so I would keep an open mind. It's quite possible that he felt his first email wasn't complete enough and so sent a quick follow-up.
I'm just saying to check it out, take it easy and don't be too hasty.
I e-mailed him back and I did comment on the marriage thing. I just said it was interesting that he would say that since there seems to be a "rule" that things like kids/marriage shouldn't be discussed on a first date, let alone before even speaking on the phone. I also said that I wasn't one to rush into marriage and wanted to take time to get to know another person without that sort of pressure.
His response was very defensive and could be interpreted as argumentative, but I chose to ignore the "attitude" and wrote back again. Oh, in that e-mail he made the comment "I could literally get a date for every night of the week." and brought up how he used to go to bars and party all the time, but he's past that now and he knows that eventually he'll find someone who wants to be in love as much as he does So anyway, I went ahead and responded (still giving the guy the benefit of the doubt) and this time he responded within about a minute. This time he mentioned that even though he loves his job, he's not opposed to quitting it and finding something new in order to move closer to the one he falls in love with (he's in Austin, I'm in San Antonio).
It's kind of weird - he's probably the type of guy most women would love to have, but he's throwing his "perfect marriage material" in my face so quickly it's just odd.
Oh, and taking advice from Mathguy and others on here, I sent an e-mail to another guy whose profile really seemed interesting to me. No sense putting all my eggs in one basket, so to speak I usually don't like to write first, but what do I have to lose?
His response was very defensive and could be interpreted as argumentative, but I chose to ignore the "attitude" and wrote back again. Oh, in that e-mail he made the comment "I could literally get a date for every night of the week."
I would hope that cleared all doubts...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tropical Trouble
Oh, and taking advice from Mathguy and others on here, I sent an e-mail to another guy whose profile really seemed interesting to me. No sense putting all my eggs in one basket, so to speak I usually don't like to write first, but what do I have to lose?
I e-mailed him back and I did comment on the marriage thing. I just said it was interesting that he would say that since there seems to be a "rule" that things like kids/marriage shouldn't be discussed on a first date, let alone before even speaking on the phone. I also said that I wasn't one to rush into marriage and wanted to take time to get to know another person without that sort of pressure.
His response was very defensive and could be interpreted as argumentative, but I chose to ignore the "attitude" and wrote back again. Oh, in that e-mail he made the comment "I could literally get a date for every night of the week." and brought up how he used to go to bars and party all the time, but he's past that now and he knows that eventually he'll find someone who wants to be in love as much as he does So anyway, I went ahead and responded (still giving the guy the benefit of the doubt) and this time he responded within about a minute. This time he mentioned that even though he loves his job, he's not opposed to quitting it and finding something new in order to move closer to the one he falls in love with (he's in Austin, I'm in San Antonio).
It's kind of weird - he's probably the type of guy most women would love to have, but he's throwing his "perfect marriage material" in my face so quickly it's just odd.
I see so many alarm klaxons sounding that I can't be bothered to list them all.
My advice is do a runner.
To rephrase your last "he's probably the type of guy most women would love to have", to "he's probably the type of guy most women think they would love to have".
Anyone that ever has the defensive "I could literally do XYZ instead of bothering with you", well my response is why aren't you doing it?
Wanneroo, I think he was saying that he was a player and his playing days are over.
This is why I hate email communication, we read thoughts,feelings and reflections into the writing but it may or may not be there.
TT, if you feel uncomfortable, then maybe he isn't right for you. In the meantime, good luck with the new guys you've written to.
Oh I get ya on the written communication and in fact I think I had mentioned that previously in this thread.
However it can give some insight into things and he said quite enough that it all sounds too wrong to me. I could understand a jarring misstep or two but he is saying all too much that just sounds wrong.
I don't think so. As soon as I see "I could literally get a date for every night of the week," the as@ would be out of my mailbox.
To me there are people that talk and then there are people that do. Talkers don't contribute much to the world. If he is on the market to find a decent woman he would be out dating and getting to know women every night of the week.
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So anyway, I went ahead and responded (still giving the guy the benefit of the doubt) and this time he responded within about a minute. This time he mentioned that even though he loves his job, he's not opposed to quitting it and finding something new in order to move closer to the one he falls in love with (he's in Austin, I'm in San Antonio). 
I usually don't like to write first, but what do I have to lose? 
