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[Someone suggested I make this a thread and I agree!]
I have recently become a fan of Urbanmonk.com. Given the high number of threads around here on the topic of manliness, perhaps this will make an interesting discussion. As a female, I'll probably observe more than anything else.
I'm starting a paragraph or two in:
No rites of passage
True manhood is being a perfect balance of velvet and steel. It is the perfect balance between being hard and soft. It is knowing when to unsheathe your sword, and when to hide it.
Are you a man? Most males are not.
In current culture, we grow up into adulthood without any proper training. The education system gives us skills to earn a living, and that’s not good enough. Being able to support yourself is just a part of manhood, yes, but only a part. We have no rites of passage like ancient cultures do. The result? Boys in men’s bodies. What manhood isn’t
I kept my sword sheathed as a teen. I kept my power hidden for fear of upsetting others. I was a wimp. I went through life governed by fear. Read the list of what I was afraid of – Do you recognise any of these in yourself?
Fear of women (especially beautiful ones), fear of the boss, fear of hard work, fear of being humiliated, of standing out, and fear of displeasing my parents.
That was not a good way to live. I achieved nothing, I got nothing.
Other males have their swords out all the time. These are the cool “bad boys”. They use anger and intimidation to get their way. They often show no regard for other people. They could come across as callous or rude.
I went through a phase like this (the pendulum effect, which I shall detail in a future post), and it does give you slightly more power and leverage. But I didn’t like it – I had simply changed I was afraid of. I can also honestly say that people like this hide a different fear and insecurity.
Once we have developed the courage to find and draw our sword (notice I didn’t say develop personal power – we are all born with power, it’s just buried), we have to learn how and when to use it.
This doesn’t come naturally, no matter what anyone says. No-one is born an expert in anything. There is always a period of learning, trial and error. But once we pay our dues, we become a prince.
[Someone suggested I make this a thread and I agree!]
I have recently become a fan of Urbanmonk.com. Given the high number of threads around here on the topic of manliness, perhaps this will make an interesting discussion. As a female, I'll probably observe more than anything else.
I'm starting a paragraph or two in:
No rites of passage
True manhood is being a perfect balance of velvet and steel. It is the perfect balance between being hard and soft. It is knowing when to unsheathe your sword, and when to hide it.
Are you a man? Most males are not.
In current culture, we grow up into adulthood without any proper training. The education system gives us skills to earn a living, and that’s not good enough. Being able to support yourself is just a part of manhood, yes, but only a part. We have no rites of passage like ancient cultures do. The result? Boys in men’s bodies. What manhood isn’t
I kept my sword sheathed as a teen. I kept my power hidden for fear of upsetting others. I was a wimp. I went through life governed by fear. Read the list of what I was afraid of – Do you recognise any of these in yourself?
Fear of women (especially beautiful ones), fear of the boss, fear of hard work, fear of being humiliated, of standing out, and fear of displeasing my parents.
That was not a good way to live. I achieved nothing, I got nothing.
Other males have their swords out all the time. These are the cool “bad boys”. They use anger and intimidation to get their way. They often show no regard for other people. They could come across as callous or rude.
I went through a phase like this (the pendulum effect, which I shall detail in a future post), and it does give you slightly more power and leverage. But I didn’t like it – I had simply changed I was afraid of. I can also honestly say that people like this hide a different fear and insecurity.
Once we have developed the courage to find and draw our sword (notice I didn’t say develop personal power – we are all born with power, it’s just buried), we have to learn how and when to use it.
This doesn’t come naturally, no matter what anyone says. No-one is born an expert in anything. There is always a period of learning, trial and error. But once we pay our dues, we become a prince.
[Someone suggested I make this a thread and I agree!]
I have recently become a fan of Urbanmonk.com. Given the high number of threads around here on the topic of manliness, perhaps this will make an interesting discussion. As a female, I'll probably observe more than anything else.
I'm starting a paragraph or two in:
No rites of passage
True manhood is being a perfect balance of velvet and steel. It is the perfect balance between being hard and soft. It is knowing when to unsheathe your sword, and when to hide it.
Are you a man? Most males are not.
In current culture, we grow up into adulthood without any proper training. The education system gives us skills to earn a living, and that’s not good enough. Being able to support yourself is just a part of manhood, yes, but only a part. We have no rites of passage like ancient cultures do. The result? Boys in men’s bodies. What manhood isn’t
I kept my sword sheathed as a teen. I kept my power hidden for fear of upsetting others. I was a wimp. I went through life governed by fear. Read the list of what I was afraid of – Do you recognise any of these in yourself?
Fear of women (especially beautiful ones), fear of the boss, fear of hard work, fear of being humiliated, of standing out, and fear of displeasing my parents.
That was not a good way to live. I achieved nothing, I got nothing.
Other males have their swords out all the time. These are the cool “bad boys”. They use anger and intimidation to get their way. They often show no regard for other people. They could come across as callous or rude.
I went through a phase like this (the pendulum effect, which I shall detail in a future post), and it does give you slightly more power and leverage. But I didn’t like it – I had simply changed I was afraid of. I can also honestly say that people like this hide a different fear and insecurity.
Once we have developed the courage to find and draw our sword (notice I didn’t say develop personal power – we are all born with power, it’s just buried), we have to learn how and when to use it.
This doesn’t come naturally, no matter what anyone says. No-one is born an expert in anything. There is always a period of learning, trial and error. But once we pay our dues, we become a prince.
I suspect this thread will descend into a bunch of women telling men what "real" or "true" or "manly" man is for about the 500th time.
I've seen and read a billion manuals or articles, or whatever we call them, and it's all a bunch of gibberish. I don't need to be defined by anyone, least not by women. I am a man of honour and integrity, because I live my life treating people with courtesy and respect. I may make mistakes along the way, and unintentionally hurt people, but as much as I am a man, I am also a human being and I make mistakes along the way. I have flaws like any other person.
I am not defined by anyone, not a man, not a woman. Women don't like to be told what they are and what they are supposed to act like, so please stop defining us men. It's insulting and demeaning.
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