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It depends on what I need. For different needs I go to different people, no one can serve all the needs all the time.
I'm not really a needy person though.
When my husband died I needed my friends, family, music and myself.
When I need someone who knows me well and a high empathy rating: my BFF, when I need something fixed my BIL or ex (when I can't myself), someone to just tell me how well I've done with my life: MOM, when I need some who loves me but will tell me the unvarnished truth: BFF and sister, sometimes my FIL, sometimes my MIL.... yeah it all depends...
We all "use" each other for our strengths. My friends call me when they need a "plan" or a "fixer" in general. I'm also very good at justifications or when they need an honest loving opinion.
It depends on what I need. For different needs I go to different people, no one can serve all the needs all the time.
I'm not really a needy person though.
When my husband died I needed my friends, family, music and myself.
When I need someone who knows me well and a high empathy rating: my BFF, when I need something fixed my BIL or ex (when I can't myself), someone to just tell me how well I've done with my life: MOM, when I need some who loves me but will tell me the unvarnished truth: BFF and sister, sometimes my FIL, sometimes my MIL.... yeah it all depends...
We all "use" each other for our strengths. My friends call me when they need a "plan" or a "fixer" in general. I'm also very good at justifications or when they need an honest loving opinion.
Sorry for your loss Mikala, yours is the voice of experience, that's for sure.
Thank you LM. I do try and keep in mind that "loss" is relative, while my definition has been expanded greatly, I DO realize that others have not yet been pushed to the same limits. Thankfully. And that doesn't make their feelings any less the intense.
If times are really tough I can always go to my family for advice or support. If I just have some crap bothering me and I need to vent or just get it off my chest I have a couple really good friends I can go have a few beers with and be done with it.
Turn to god, then self reflect on whatever the issue is, and remember that there is good in all things you just have to find the good in that situation and focus on that and the word of god.
I talk to my grandma, my dad's mom. I feel a lot closer to her than my real mom, she pays my college tuition and helps me get along in life.. I talk to her at least a few times a week and I live with her when I'm not away at school.
Other than that, I turn to my car Going for a drive, even if it's to Wal-Mart or a gas station or something, always feels great.
I usually try to tough things out myself.I learned from my parents long ago that if I don't look out for myself no one else will.
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