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The way I look at it is this: When she asks, and I tell her what I do, and she makes a judgement whether I'm good enough for her or not based on my occupation, I am dodging a bullet. She is doing me a MASSIVE favour. If she's looking for someone that can splash cash on her and she thinks I'm not suitable for that - Thank God, and goodbye. Cheerio.
I don't have any problem saying what I do. I work as a Senior Careers Advisor, decent job with a decent-good salary. I'd sometimes go into what I do in details and share with her some of the funny amusing stories I have encounted with clients.
It makes sense. Younger women ask more questions and "interview" more because they are still husband shopping. Not generally so for older women.They have either been there and done that, and don't want to go there again. The others who are interested in marrying again are not holding out much hope of it happening, so maybe they have decided to make the most of the life they have, and put the thought of marriage prospects WAY back on the burner. So they SEEM more relaxed. But chances are, older women have some issues that deeply concern them regarding the men they date; the guy's occupation just isn't a "hot" issue for them.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound
I think to some degree the older ladies have just relaxed a little on the standards, not in a bad way, just more aware of the big picture.
Strange. My standards have risen and I attract a different type of person than I used to. I feel I can be choosier now. But it's about character, not job/career/financial status.
Hmmm... I generally ask ALL the new people I meet what they do for work. And I am disappointed when they don't ask me the same. Especially if we are going to be spending time together. My work is very much a part of who I am, and also what other people are about. So to not ask about my work or their work, makes me feel that the new acquaintance is not going to progress beyond a very casual and superficial level.
And no one should feel ashamed at what they do. And if they do, then I suspect that it's only themselves that know they should have pushed themselves harder earlier in life instead of being a slacker. Otherwise, I once knew a guy that worked at a grocery store because it was the sort of job where he could take off every summer and all summer to go travel the world, and in the fall, they would take him back for work. He was good about saving money, and would stay in youth hostels in his travels. But I found it very cool that he had this passion for traveling, and it didn't bother me that his job was working at a grocery store. But he was also in his 20's.
I also find that if someone comes across as being well spoken, well educated, AND knowledgeable and interested in a broad range of subjects, people do assume that this person is successful and has a good job. And no, if a guy is driving a nice car, I do not assume that he's successful or rich. These days, many only lease their cars instead of buying them. Or it's a company car.
Hello folks, the CD player is back.......just kidding.
Thought I'd "slap up" a thread for you good kind folks.
In my dating experiences with dating older and younger women, I've notice the Older babes almost never ask me about my career/job but the younger ones almost always "shoot off" that question immediately.
I've noticed since I've dated on both ends of the age group.
I'm 36yo so older, we will say, is 45 to 55 and younger is 26 to 36.
I think I know why, but it seems like the "older" 50 to 55 age group focus on morals/values and just developing good solid relationships. They don't seem to care to much about what I do as long as it's LEGAL, I take care of myself and I don't whine to them about my job if I dislike it. From my experience, at least the older babes I like, they seem to know how to live life more so than the younger ones.
I find myself never lost for words with that(50-55) age group. With the younger women, it always seems like a job interview/competition.
This thought occurred to me when I was asked by my "new friend" why I liked older women. She's 50 and she looks good. Anyone see The Devil Wears Prada, Meryl Streep has the look of my new friend. At least the hair style and elegance. I like the salt and pepper look. It's sharp.
Anyway, chime in........
Just seems like older women are more laid back period.
They will ask direct questions if they want to know, but as long as you have your life together they really do not seem to worry about specifics that much.
It may be that the younger women who do this are seeking the potential lifestyle that can be had if they get with the guy.
The older women who do not are already quite self sufficient and are more looking for someone who can be an equal more so than a provider.
Admittedly that is the one place I do fib. Not that my income or job is on the high scale, but everyone locally knows our corporation and the 'levels'.
I am honest about the job but drop a couple of levels.
I love talking with older single women. They really do have a great perspective on life. They are typically straightforward, laidback, confident, and know exactly what they want. So I know what you mean.
I agree.
There is this 67 year old woman that used to work with me.
She was partially retired and just doing the job to keep busy.
To this day we still occasionally go and spend some time.
She is a blast to converse with.
And so energetic and fun.
It never bothers me when they ask what I do for a living and I am happy to tell them. Maybe I shoot myself in the foot sometimes with being so honest and willing to let them know what type of guy I am. I am happy with who I am and what I am good at. Not very many people get to do a job they really enjoy and can make a living out of it.
A date (this was a first date, mind you) once informed me that he was a gay porn actor. Then he produced proof. That's not something I would have liked to find out 6 months into our relationship.
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