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My mother is going to leave all that she has to me. She has her will set up and while her husband doesn't agree with it all, that's what she wants. She has also made it clear to me that I need to get a will set up because she does not want her money going to my husband if something happens to me. She wants it to stay in the family, and as a previous poster mentioned, that means blood. So, if we have children, a trust will be set up. If not, my cousin's children will have college money.
It was a $100 row house when we met
The kids are going to make out like bandits as they are going to inherit a princely sum and if spent wisely will make for a very comfortable lifestyle.
The more you post the clearer it becomes. You could have purchased the house you wanted but you chose not to, but expecting you wife to use her inheritence to buy one, after accusing her of using you as a meal ticket and claiming you provided a fantastic lifestyle. Somethings not right here.
My mother is going to leave all that she has to me. She has her will set up and while her husband doesn't agree with it all, that's what she wants. She has also made it clear to me that I need to get a will set up because she does not want her money going to my husband if something happens to me. She wants it to stay in the family, and as a previous poster mentioned, that means blood. So, if we have children, a trust will be set up. If not, my cousin's children will have college money.
I'm sure there is some well-meaning reason behind this, but I think it's a slap in the face to your husband and hers. She wants it to stay in "family"? Seriously?
What an insult not to call your husband family. If you two have kids, each child will be half his blood - but he's still not "family"? Are the kids only half-family since they aren't 100% your bloodline?
I'm sure there is some well-meaning reason behind this, but I think it's a slap in the face to your husband and hers. She wants it to stay in "family"? Seriously?
What an insult not to call your husband family. If you two have kids, each child will be half his blood - but he's still not "family"? Are the kids only half-family since they aren't 100% your bloodline?
I agree 100%. I would feel terrible if someone did this to me. Gosh, money are really the cause of all evil.
Thats where i was hoping it might go but no chance,we'll stay in this crappy little row house forever.
As far as discussing it with her we did all that 2 years ago and the bottom line after weeks of discussion was its her money and i have no say in the matter.
She spends a lot of time with her friends who are all unemployed and on welfare very large ballsy in your face type of women all separated, single and with at least 1 screwed up child ,i sometimes wonder if they envied the friendly relationship me the wife and kids have and steered her in this direction to create friction in the relationship with the hopes that it would end up in divorce and she would earn her right into becoming another member of the sisterhood.Nice try girls
What is the rest of the story? You have a high paying job, and she also works, but you live in a rather inexpensive rental house, you own one car and have no RV's or Boat. So where does all the money from this high paying job go? So, by being married to you she hasn't lived a really exciting life for the last 32 years, enough to eat, cloths to wear but having to live a frugal life style. These are your words, they don't add up. I doubt if her unemployed friends will talk her into divorce, but I can see where you could do that if you don't change your attitude. She knows her money is more important to you than she is, and you've been mad for two years. I know what I would do with you if I were her.
I'm sure there is some well-meaning reason behind this, but I think it's a slap in the face to your husband and hers. She wants it to stay in "family"? Seriously?
What an insult not to call your husband family. If you two have kids, each child will be half his blood - but he's still not "family"? Are the kids only half-family since they aren't 100% your bloodline?
The children will be his family and her family, but he's not her family, tho, he is extended family I guess. He doesn't have a problem with this. I know if his mom passed and left us whatever, and then he passed soon after, I would certainly forward the inheritance over to my husband's nieces and nephews if we didn't have children.
Any way, I don't think it's that difficult to grasp. She's busted her arse all her life and she's did so for my brother and I, and whatever children we have, not my husband. Likewise for his parents.
My husband inherited some money many years ago. He was the sole breadwinner in our family to begin with and when he got the inheritance check it went straight into our joint checking account, where I proceeded to pay off some debt and get some work done on the house.
IMO If you have no "joint" debt then I think it's fine to keep the money separate. But it ought to be used to enrich your lives if you both can agree on something. A trip? A vacation home? Anything really.
This situation happened 2 years ago and we dont talk about it anymore but i'm still mad..
Living a seemingly happy life with wife for 32 years,have two children, we both work and money has always been put into the household joint accounts Checking and savings,we've always lived frugally and never buy stuff we cant afford so we never carry any debt.
Wifes father passes away and leaves her $500,000 which she promptly puts in a private account that i have no access to and she's not entertaining any idea of spending any of it. As i always made double her income and put everything in the pot i feel somewhat betrayed that now she has a financial windfall i have no say in any part of it and am now wondering if i was just a meal ticket all these years. had the situation been reversed i'd have probably invested much of the money but would have put a substantial amount in the joint accounts and said take what you need.
I think only a woman who does't trust she has much of a future with her husband would do what your wife did. You are the one that has the answers. You should be able to answer why your wife would do such a thing?
Either you married a greedy money hungry woman or your wife doesnt' think there's a future with you in it.
Thanks for all the perspectives. very enlightening, I'll just accept the fact that my job in life is to just pay all the bills.
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Wife gets inheiritance
. As i always made double her income and put everything in the pot i feel somewhat betrayed that now she has a financial windfall i have no say in any part of it and am now wondering if i was just a meal ticket all these years. had the situation been reversed i'd have probably invested much of the money but would have put a substantial amount in the joint accounts and said take what you need.
