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Just an FYI, an attractive person today may not be so attractive in the future for all sorts of reasons. If that's your main criteria then don't get married. You won't get to play around yourself forever because probably you too will become less attractive, but at least you won't ruin anyone else's life.
Talk to a pro before making any decisions. I suspect they'll want you to try new things, attempt to rekindle the flame, etc and in the end if you're just not attracted you'll either cheat or divorce. Still, there's a rare chance something between you might change for the better so it's still worth investigating.
Either talk to her and work it out, or set her free to find someone who really loves her. Nobody deserves to be married to someone who's always thinking the grass may be greener on the other side. Just stop and think about this for a minute: perhaps she's not attracted to you anymore either, and is thinking about finding another man - it's possible! Don't be so sure it's all your decision to make.
I don't think attraction can come back, to be honest. Did he say how long they were married? Maybe they can live separately for now and see what happens.
Just an FYI, an attractive person today may not be so attractive in the future for all sorts of reasons. If that's your main criteria then don't get married. You won't get to play around yourself forever because probably you too will become less attractive, but at least you won't ruin anyone else's life.
He did not indicate that his wife is not attractive; he just lost an attraction for her. Two different things. People can lose attraction for someone for a number of reasons besides looks.
I married late in life to someone that made me laugh and accepted me as I am. I felt very comfortable with him and had similar backgrounds. I wanted to start a family as was already in my early thirties as was he. Tired of the dating scene and knew there was no "dream" man so we got married. I can tell you from experience and years of regret that having that "spark" is so important as well as attraction. These things were always missing for me but tried to convince myself that they were superficial and having a best friend was more important. WRONG!!!! We are still married after 19 years and have a child but there is no chemistry or desire on my part for him. He still finds me sexually attractive and always hints about what he would like to do to me but I am just turned off. Chemistry is just as important as the other things and now I feel like I cheated myself and him. Sorry for deviating from the OP but felt is was relative to the subject.
Thanks for sharing! I like your words - they're helpful to me.
Just an FYI, an attractive person today may not be so attractive in the future for all sorts of reasons. If that's your main criteria then don't get married. You won't get to play around yourself forever because probably you too will become less attractive, but at least you won't ruin anyone else's life.
Yes people change as life progresses. The thing is about being together in a committed relationship is to accept the change and grow together. The ability to talk, and when you don't feel like talking it is okay as well.
Can't help but quote from another thread running concurrently:
Quote:
Originally Posted by professorsenator
The older I get the more I ...care less about money, education, power, status, physical appearance, and all the superfluous things that so many of us tend to dwell upon.
And the more I prize kindness, a caring attitude, happiness, decency, vivaciousness, intelligence, integrity, sincerity.
Just sayin...
---- I would think THIS would be the normal flow of one's thinking and development, as they grow older .... How did "kindness, a caring attitude, happiness, decency, vivaciousness, intelligence, integrity, sincerity" get out-weighed by sex, in this thread? Are we not supposed to see better -- with our hearts -- as we get older? If a person makes you laugh, makes you feel free and yourself, treats you with kindness, - well, that's something valuable, much more so than the disappointments that await you if you decide to swap oll this for the string of dates.
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