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Old 05-22-2010, 10:36 PM
 
1,810 posts, read 3,332,995 times
Reputation: 2015

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Quote:
Originally Posted by fallingwater View Post
I agree with Vicket. I had a situation recently that falls into this category. I am actually still kind of pissed about it.

A guy that just started working with my husband is from our hometown. We live out of state so it was really cool to meet someone from where we grew up. This new guy kind of latched onto my husband and kept asking him to go for a beer or just to hang out. Hubby and I understand how hard it is trying to fit in here (there is a small town mentality at times, hard to make friends) so hubby asked me if he could invite the guy over for BQ. I said sure. I made quite a spread and the guy seemed pretty nice. He said he was eager to get his wife and kids relocated because he was missing them. I printed out info from the computer on housing options and so forth. Ya, know...just being nice. I would have loved to have met someone from my hometown when we relocated here. We knew no one. I was thinking how great it would be if his wife and I hit it off and we could all be friends and so forth.

The next day hubby goes to work and was told by his work buddies that he shouldnt invite the new guy to his house anymore. My husband asked what was up. This new guy, that I was NICE to and invited into our home was telling the guys at the plant how it seemed like I wanted to screw him. This guy is fricking nasty. He is extremely over weight, a complete goof ball and ate like a horse. Ya...I wanna screw him. He said some very graphic sexual things about me. Needless to say, the jerk has not been invited back. He is still unsure if he wants to move his family here, keeps hoping his old job will call him back. Honestly, I hope they do. Good riddens.
What an idiot...
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Old 05-23-2010, 02:07 AM
 
14,094 posts, read 12,655,078 times
Reputation: 9656
I totally get what you're saying. Just today I was talking to a friend about this same deal. Its always 'certain' men that don't get that just because a woman talks to them, that the woman is just being friendly. Usually ignorant , retards who never talk to women in the first place and want to be seen as better than other men, when they are not! It makes a woman put up a b**** shield with everyone that approaches. Because a woman never knows who is socially incapable of having female friendships, until the guy shows his lizard tail.
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Old 05-23-2010, 02:14 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
1,589 posts, read 2,523,931 times
Reputation: 2154
Its not just men who make that mistake. I was shocked when my very best girlfriend whom I have known since childhood accused me of flirting with her husband of 25+ years. I was aghast! The truth is I don't even like him that much, I had just always made a point to be polite to him out of respect for her.

It's not the first time I have been charged with this type of violation, other women have accused me of flirting with their men. It's so weird to me because in each case, I've actually had a strong dislike for the men I'm supposedly flirting with.

I've learned to never say much more than "hello' to a married man. If I laugh at his jokes or ask him a question, it may be mistaken as a come on.... from his wife.
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Old 05-23-2010, 03:08 AM
 
Location: Saudi Arabia
1,823 posts, read 1,779,285 times
Reputation: 791
Lol .. this post reminds me of my school days .. in India we have a festival called ''Raksha Bandhan'' .. its a day celebrated by sisters for their brothers in Hinduism. Okay now on this day girls tie a band on the wrists of their respective brothers or to those whom they look upon as their guardian, more like a brother .. so in school the girls used to bring those bands to tie on the wrists of those boys that had this misunderstanding (She likes me) lol .. although i was never too keen on having a girl friend at that age like most of my guy friends .. since i was the shy type(bully) more into sports and performing arts .. i hardly talked to them girls, helped them complete their homeworks and yes as a good artist i was a hit for drawing mathematical and scientific diagrams and illustrations ..good way to trade foreign coins and stamps .. although girls ''liked'' me for my chivalrous attitude as i stood against those fellas who tease them .. i don't know if they were using me or something ..but thats how i was and guys hated me for that .. today many of my school mates are married..some have children .. we participate in school reunions and have a good time .. some girls married those whom they once tied the band lol .. well times change people change and life goes on ..hehe psst im still in touch with my childhood sweetheart .. we're just good friends
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Old 05-23-2010, 04:40 AM
 
Location: SXSW
640 posts, read 1,642,006 times
Reputation: 617
Quote:
Originally Posted by fallingwater View Post
I agree with Vicket. I had a situation recently that falls into this category. I am actually still kind of pissed about it.

A guy that just started working with my husband is from our hometown. We live out of state so it was really cool to meet someone from where we grew up. This new guy kind of latched onto my husband and kept asking him to go for a beer or just to hang out. Hubby and I understand how hard it is trying to fit in here (there is a small town mentality at times, hard to make friends) so hubby asked me if he could invite the guy over for BQ. I said sure. I made quite a spread and the guy seemed pretty nice. He said he was eager to get his wife and kids relocated because he was missing them. I printed out info from the computer on housing options and so forth. Ya, know...just being nice. I would have loved to have met someone from my hometown when we relocated here. We knew no one. I was thinking how great it would be if his wife and I hit it off and we could all be friends and so forth.

The next day hubby goes to work and was told by his work buddies that he shouldnt invite the new guy to his house anymore. My husband asked what was up. This new guy, that I was NICE to and invited into our home was telling the guys at the plant how it seemed like I wanted to screw him. This guy is fricking nasty. He is extremely over weight, a complete goof ball and ate like a horse. Ya...I wanna screw him. He said some very graphic sexual things about me. Needless to say, the jerk has not been invited back. He is still unsure if he wants to move his family here, keeps hoping his old job will call him back. Honestly, I hope they do. Good riddens.
Wow. What a total d-bag!
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Old 05-23-2010, 05:52 AM
 
399 posts, read 658,411 times
Reputation: 403
So, even if a woman is very nice to us we can't assume anything... Then, do we wait until she flat out tells us she likes us? Obviously she won't! (in most cases anyway). So, if we have to keep guessing, why not guessing for the best?
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Old 05-23-2010, 06:15 AM
 
4,502 posts, read 12,752,423 times
Reputation: 4080
Quote:
Originally Posted by carra View Post
So, even if a woman is very nice to us we can't assume anything... Then, do we wait until she flat out tells us she likes us? Obviously she won't! (in most cases anyway). So, if we have to keep guessing, why not guessing for the best?
OMG... if a woman "likes-likes" you, she WILL send a signal. Smiling and saying "Good Morning Carra" doesn't mean she wants to hop in bed with you!

I had many experiences like this also. One in particular grosses me out to this day. I went to the Chinese restaurant that we had been using for quite a while. I was familiar with the family ---- I didn't "know" them, but was familiar with everyone. Well, one day I went in to order some food and the little kids were there and a much older man was there. It was their grandfather visiting from Hong Kong. He spoke a little English and I was talking to him, asking how he was enjoying America, if he planned on going to the Statue of Liberty, etc. We were having what I thought was a nice, friendly conversation and then he asked me if I was married and I said "yes".... he laughed and said something about "American women" and said he can't "talk" to a married woman! (I wish I could insert a BARF emoticon here!!!)
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Old 05-23-2010, 07:03 AM
 
Location: North America
1,089 posts, read 2,265,126 times
Reputation: 1098
I'm the exact opposite. If I think a girl is being more than just friendly I usually withdraw. I'm trying to stop this ridiculous behavior, at least with girls I do find attractive.

I don't know how any guy can confuse common friendliness with flirtatiousness though. The difference is blatantly obvious. However, just because a girl is flirting, doesn't mean she's interested either. She could just be being playful and fun.

Quote:
if a woman "likes-likes" you, she WILL send a signal
Omigawd, oh come on! Admit it, there is no "signal", if there was guys (and girls) would be taught what it is so there would be no confusion.
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Old 05-23-2010, 07:16 AM
 
399 posts, read 658,411 times
Reputation: 403
Unfortunately, the same behavior in different girls can be WILDLY different. On one hand, some very flirtatious girls seem to be sending you signals when they are not. On the other hand, some more shy girls think they are sending you clear signals, but nobody sees them.

And I am speaking from experience here. So, don't think it is always obvious for us. Most of the time, it isn't.
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Old 05-23-2010, 07:37 AM
 
4,502 posts, read 12,752,423 times
Reputation: 4080
Quote:
Originally Posted by cuinlalaland View Post
Omigawd, oh come on! Admit it, there is no "signal", if there was guys (and girls) would be taught what it is so there would be no confusion.
Everyone is different so you can't "teach" people the type of signal any one person may send.

The problem is men who think they're so freaking irresistable that every woman wants to fall on her back and let him have his way with her.

Look at the post above about the woman's husband's co-worker. She was simply being nice, trying to help him get his family relocated and settled and the next day he runs to work telling everyone who would listen that she "wanted" him and made disgusting sexual comments about her. Did he REALLY think she was interested in him?? Or that she wanted to have sex with him??? What a disgusting piece of crap.
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