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lighter side, have u read the labels on the bottles in a liquor store?
could be harmful to pregnancy.
??
if it were not for alcohol there would not be much pregnancy.
Geez - where have all you women who don't want children been hiding?! Most of the women I meet in Austin who are around my age (I'm 28) want to have children. I would love to date someone close to my age who isn't interested in having children because I'm not interested in having children, either.
Yes, a lot of my old high school pals are celebrating the births of their first grandchildren. Their kids are in their late teens-early 20's.
My oldest son is almost 17, so technically, yes-I am old enough to be a grandmother.
(When he was born, my mother was my age-41, and he was her first grandchild.)
Having your first child in your early 40's is late in the game, IMO. Most people have their first child in their 20's.
Wow....I know 40s is a little on the old side to have your first kid, but aside from one or two military wives I don't think I know anyone who had a baby before 30. Most of my friends and I have just barely gotten used to the idea that some of us are married, let alone kids.
Not that there's anything wrong with it, it just seems so young to me. I guess in my head I always considered 50 to be the minimum
Location: Pelion, South Carolina/orig. from Cape May, NJ
1,113 posts, read 3,494,372 times
Reputation: 1176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mooseketeer
I decided not to have children when I was about 15. I never wanted kids, have no maternal feelings and have no desire to procreate.
I find kids on the whole boring, messy, dirty, noisy, and did I say boring ? When I first became serious with my now husband it was one of the first thing we discussed as I do not believe we could ever have a successful relationship if we had diverging views on the issue. One of us would end up suffering and sacrificing something important to them which would not be fair.
I have been called "un-natural", "evil" and "selfish" by many women ( men never feel it is their right to comment ) and have been patronised many times with such pearls of wisdom as "you'll see when you get older", "you'll regret it", " you are not a real woman without kids", and my favourite " who will look after you when you are old ?".... I just ignore those morons .
I am 42 and not having kids has been the very best decision of my life ever. I love my husband and love the freedom we have together. I would not have the patience to be a mother. Kids can be mildy entertaining for a few hours at best and I do quite nejoy baby-sitting our little neighbours and teaching them about architecture, history , the arts etc... or reading to them. After a couple of hours though quite frankly I do become bored and just want to hand back. Which I can do.
The relentless nature of motherhood does not appeal in the slightest. I love being able to travel as I wish, to go out at 3am if I feel like it and most of all I love having my Husband all to myself.
I am happy and fulfilled without children and not bored which is hugely important to me. I lead an active and busy life and do not feel I am missing out in any way , shape or form.
Motherhood is wonderful for those who genuinely want children and can genuinely embrace their maternal side. I have no maternal side. I would make a terrible parent as I would be bored, restless and resentful.
Kids deserve to be loved and wanted. They need someone's full attention and I am fully aware that this is simply not me. It is better to realise this before having kids . A lot of people I know resent their children and reluctant do admit that maybe they were mis-sold a myth of glorious domestic bliss and that the reality has not quite lived up to the hype.
Very good post.
It's a shame more people (myself included ) don't have this foresight before having kids. If they did I'm sure there would be a lot less abused, unwanted kids in this world.
It's a shame more people (myself included ) don't have this foresight before having kids. If they did I'm sure there would be a lot less abused, unwanted kids in this world.
you shouldn't abuse your kids, just because you didn't want them. sheesh.
Wow....I know 40s is a little on the old side to have your first kid, but aside from one or two military wives I don't think I know anyone who had a baby before 30. Most of my friends and I have just barely gotten used to the idea that some of us are married, let alone kids.
Not that there's anything wrong with it, it just seems so young to me. I guess in my head I always considered 50 to be the minimum
I think it has a lot to do with the education levels in DC. Arlington is the most educated county in the country, so it would be a logical conclusion that more people wait to have babies as they are busy with graduate school (and then want to actually use the degree that they worked so hard for!!!)
I agree though, 27-28 is the youngest I've seen anyone around me have children. Most don't even have kids on their radar until early 30s.
Location: Pelion, South Carolina/orig. from Cape May, NJ
1,113 posts, read 3,494,372 times
Reputation: 1176
Quote:
Originally Posted by juniperbleu
Wow....I know 40s is a little on the old side to have your first kid, but aside from one or two military wives I don't think I know anyone who had a baby before 30. Most of my friends and I have just barely gotten used to the idea that some of us are married, let alone kids.
Not that there's anything wrong with it, it just seems so young to me. I guess in my head I always considered 50 to be the minimum
Most of my friends had their first child at 19.
I am the only one out of all of us who has a baby. They all have kids in high school or college.
I had my first child when I was 24. My last was born when I was 39, which is still considered "old" by OBs, despite women having kids later these days.
This waiting until your 30s to have kids is a newfangled thing, especially having kids after 40. In previous generations, that was mostly unheard of. Back in the day, women got married right out of high school and immediately started a family. There were no tests like there are today to determine if a fetus had Down's Syndrome, so if woman had a baby in her late 30s, she was taking a big risk.
I decided not to have children when I was about 15. I never wanted kids, have no maternal feelings and have no desire to procreate.
I find kids on the whole boring, messy, dirty, noisy, and did I say boring ? When I first became serious with my now husband it was one of the first thing we discussed as I do not believe we could ever have a successful relationship if we had diverging views on the issue. One of us would end up suffering and sacrificing something important to them which would not be fair.
I have been called "un-natural", "evil" and "selfish" by many women ( men never feel it is their right to comment ) and have been patronised many times with such pearls of wisdom as "you'll see when you get older", "you'll regret it", " you are not a real woman without kids", and my favourite " who will look after you when you are old ?".... I just ignore those morons .
I am 42 and not having kids has been the very best decision of my life ever. I love my husband and love the freedom we have together. I would not have the patience to be a mother. Kids can be mildy entertaining for a few hours at best and I do quite nejoy baby-sitting our little neighbours and teaching them about architecture, history , the arts etc... or reading to them. After a couple of hours though quite frankly I do become bored and just want to hand back. Which I can do.
The relentless nature of motherhood does not appeal in the slightest. I love being able to travel as I wish, to go out at 3am if I feel like it and most of all I love having my Husband all to myself.
I am happy and fulfilled without children and not bored which is hugely important to me. I lead an active and busy life and do not feel I am missing out in any way , shape or form.
Motherhood is wonderful for those who genuinely want children and can genuinely embrace their maternal side. I have no maternal side. I would make a terrible parent as I would be bored, restless and resentful.
Kids deserve to be loved and wanted. They need someone's full attention and I am fully aware that this is simply not me. It is better to realise this before having kids . A lot of people I know resent their children and reluctant do admit that maybe they were mis-sold a myth of glorious domestic bliss and that the reality has not quite lived up to the hype.
There is still a lot of socio cultural pressure for women to have children or at least to make a show of being maternal as though not wanting kids is a character defect and makes you somehow morally suspect. Even men IMO do get roped in by this bizarre idea that one's sole purpose on the planet is to reproduce. Happy families is not for everyone. Certainly not for me.
A friend of mine is being coerced into having a baby with his wife ( also a friend of mine) in the near future even though he is actually very anti-kids because he wants to make his wife happy. I find that immensely sad and quite dangerous for the child to be and their relationship as a couple. In my opinion this is completely wrong...
What a great post.
I sincerely regret having children. As much as I love them both and they are off my hands now, if I had my time over I would choose not to have kids. I can so relate to the boring part...
who will look after you when you are old ?".... I just ignore those morons .
One of the most selfish things I've heard.
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) don't have this foresight before having kids. If they did I'm sure there would be a lot less abused, unwanted kids in this world.