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My boyfriend and I have been together six months. He recently asked.. and I accepted his invitation to move in together. We both talked and would like to eventually get married. Well, before we started dating.... He was casually dating this girl who did not want to be serious with him because she was also dating a MARRIED man. However, my BF continued to date her until he met me....
Well, to make a long story short.. the girl ended up sending me pics of her and my bf attending a recent black eyed peas concert (after party concert). So my BF claims they are old pics. However, she titled them "black eyed peas" and sent them within a week of that after party. I checked to see if such an event existed when they were dating (Sept and Oct) and there was not. The pictures were taken at the same venue as the after party. Also, we hang out 5-7 days a week... but we did not that day or the next. He wont fess up but Im convinced those are current photos. He was doing anything bad in them and it was with a group but still......
He admitted that she texts/calls him from time to time. And he will respond "to be nice." But swears he has not seen her since we started dating. Also, he asked me to move in a week or two after this event. Since our fight.. when the pictures were sent... he deleted her off his FB and his phone (he had me do it... for him, and in front of him)
The real question is...... is he cheating? was he just meeting up with her as friends but lied bc i would not approve? If he did meet up with her, was he meeting up with her from time to time?
Also, keep in mind ( he hid our relationship status and pictures of us on his FB from this girl and another one) * long story but he claimed he didnt want them in his buisness.
I would like to trust him as I am no living with him. Things are great otherwise but I just feel like the evidence is there... even though he is not admitting it?
My boyfriend and I have been together six months. He recently asked.. and I accepted his invitation to move in together. We both talked and would like to eventually get married. Well, before we started dating.... He was casually dating this girl who did not want to be serious with him because she was also dating a MARRIED man. However, my BF continued to date her until he met me....
Well, to make a long story short.. the girl ended up sending me pics of her and my bf attending a recent black eyed peas concert (after party concert). So my BF claims they are old pics. However, she titled them "black eyed peas" and sent them within a week of that after party. I checked to see if such an event existed when they were dating (Sept and Oct) and there was not. The pictures were taken at the same venue as the after party. Also, we hang out 5-7 days a week... but we did not that day or the next. He wont fess up but Im convinced those are current photos. He was doing anything bad in them and it was with a group but still......
He admitted that she texts/calls him from time to time. And he will respond "to be nice." But swears he has not seen her since we started dating. Also, he asked me to move in a week or two after this event. Since our fight.. when the pictures were sent... he deleted her off his FB and his phone (he had me do it... for him, and in front of him)
The real question is...... is he cheating? was he just meeting up with her as friends but lied bc i would not approve? If he did meet up with her, was he meeting up with her from time to time?
Also, keep in mind ( he hid our relationship status and pictures of us on his FB from this girl and another one) * long story but he claimed he didnt want them in his buisness.
I would like to trust him as I am no living with him. Things are great otherwise but I just feel like the evidence is there... even though he is not admitting it?
So confused.Thoughts??
Hmmm..im not 100% sure on this one. I myself dont like like it if someone im dating has contact with an ex that involves hanging out together, or phone contact, etc. Espescially if they are recent exes. Just too much tempatation to me.
However, because this guy asked you to move in with him, and because you say he allowed you to delete the ex out his phone and facebook, and because you say things are great otherwise..i'd just monitor the situation. He may have been a bit squirrely in the beginning of the relationship, but if he is showing it is YOU he wants to be with, Id just let this go as long as that is the end of their contact. I had an ex that made some "insenitive choices" as our relationship took off. No cheating or anything, just stuff that he should have known would upset me. And yeah, it was some crap involving some girl he dated before me. However, he CHOSE to be with me, and was only casually dating her when he met me. He stopped dating her (they werent serious) and eventually made me his girlfriend. Turned out to be the best guy i ever dated. Eventually my own issues back then over other things made us break up. Too bad...I was younger and dumb. LOL Seems like this guy is choosing you to be serious with. You guys even had the marriage talk.
As long as your boyfriend now fully understands how you feel, and agrees to respect your feelings on this chick, I would let it drop and see how it goes. Dont hound him about it though. If he seems to be doing what you ask, leave it alone.
Last edited by Winecountry1; 06-06-2010 at 10:01 PM..
My boyfriend and I have been together six months. He recently asked.. and I accepted his invitation to move in together. We both talked and would like to eventually get married. Well, before we started dating.... He was casually dating this girl who did not want to be serious with him because she was also dating a MARRIED man. However, my BF continued to date her until he met me....
Well, to make a long story short.. the girl ended up sending me pics of her and my bf attending a recent black eyed peas concert (after party concert). So my BF claims they are old pics. However, she titled them "black eyed peas" and sent them within a week of that after party. I checked to see if such an event existed when they were dating (Sept and Oct) and there was not. The pictures were taken at the same venue as the after party. Also, we hang out 5-7 days a week... but we did not that day or the next. He wont fess up but Im convinced those are current photos. He was doing anything bad in them and it was with a group but still......
He admitted that she texts/calls him from time to time. And he will respond "to be nice." But swears he has not seen her since we started dating. Also, he asked me to move in a week or two after this event. Since our fight.. when the pictures were sent... he deleted her off his FB and his phone (he had me do it... for him, and in front of him)
The real question is...... is he cheating? was he just meeting up with her as friends but lied bc i would not approve? If he did meet up with her, was he meeting up with her from time to time?
Also, keep in mind ( he hid our relationship status and pictures of us on his FB from this girl and another one) * long story but he claimed he didnt want them in his buisness.
I would like to trust him as I am no living with him. Things are great otherwise but I just feel like the evidence is there... even though he is not admitting it?
So confused.Thoughts??
She may just be jealous of you and just trying to stir things up. I dont think it was a good choice to move with him. Your gut insticint is telling you something listen to it.
My boyfriend and I have been together six months. He recently asked.. and I accepted his invitation to move in together. We both talked and would like to eventually get married. Well, before we started dating.... He was casually dating this girl who did not want to be serious with him because she was also dating a MARRIED man. However, my BF continued to date her until he met me....
Well, to make a long story short.. the girl ended up sending me pics of her and my bf attending a recent black eyed peas concert (after party concert). So my BF claims they are old pics. However, she titled them "black eyed peas" and sent them within a week of that after party. I checked to see if such an event existed when they were dating (Sept and Oct) and there was not. The pictures were taken at the same venue as the after party. Also, we hang out 5-7 days a week... but we did not that day or the next. He wont fess up but Im convinced those are current photos. He was doing anything bad in them and it was with a group but still......
He admitted that she texts/calls him from time to time. And he will respond "to be nice." But swears he has not seen her since we started dating. Also, he asked me to move in a week or two after this event. Since our fight.. when the pictures were sent... he deleted her off his FB and his phone (he had me do it... for him, and in front of him)
The real question is...... is he cheating? was he just meeting up with her as friends but lied bc i would not approve? If he did meet up with her, was he meeting up with her from time to time?
Also, keep in mind ( he hid our relationship status and pictures of us on his FB from this girl and another one) * long story but he claimed he didnt want them in his buisness.
I would like to trust him as I am no living with him. Things are great otherwise but I just feel like the evidence is there... even though he is not admitting it?
So confused.Thoughts??
Time is your friend - give this relationship lots of it before you move in together.
There may be some red flags here that you want to be really sure of before you become more entangled with this guy.
It sounds to me like she is trying to sabotage your relationship - been there, done that. I would just keep an eye on him and note anything else that happens. Since you are now living together, he should be pretty straight as far as not hiding you and your relationship from others on FB or otherwise. If he is, then you've got a problem.
> So my BF claims they are old pics. The pictures were taken at the same venue as the after party. Also, we hang out 5-7 days a week... but we did not that day or the next. He wont fess up but Im convinced those are current photos.
You already know the truth. He is a liar and possibly a cheat. Like most cheaters, their standard operating procedure is to deny, deny, deny, even when confronted with the evidence. He is so arrogant that he thinks he can talk his way out of it because you are so in love with him and you want him so badly. He is counting on that. If you marry him, you will be signing up for a world of heartbreak and pain.
I'm in a line of work where I see this scenario play out a thousand times. Do yourself a favor and get rid of him.
If you have to ask..... thats your answer.
Since its only been 6 months I personally wouldn't put to much emphasis on anything but moving in together is a HUGE step... don't move in yet... wait awhile longer - then decide if you can trust him.. If you can't trust him - no matter what... (even if he isn't cheating/lying/etc..)... don't move in.
look at the exif data on the pictures. It'll tell you the exact date and time the pictures were taken.
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