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If so, what led you to the process and how did you change?
I've always felt fortunate and almost always happy, but some of Eckhart Tolle and other spiritual / mindfulness teachers has caused some paradigm shifts. I would have never thought it would have happened to me as my wife would bring up how she was interested in it and I'd brush it off like she was a stranger knocking on my door pushing a religion. But years later, sort of out of boredom, we started going through some things together and having deep discussions.
I'm now pretty much guilt and worry free. I spend a lot more time being relaxed and present and shutting off my running inner dialog of thoughts. Becoming financially free and living a life of adventure used to be my main goals and they are still important to me, but my top priorities are to live a life of love and spread happiness.
I realize this won't resonate with most people, but am still curious if others feel like something dramatically changed them for the better.
I do not know what is meant by "spreading happiness and love". I have come across people who make a conscious effort to do those things and they come off as irritating and intrusive. Maybe it means passing out religious literature. Sorry but that can be slightly irritating too. If it means volunteering at open shelters or doing amateur magic shows at retirement facilities, then I guess spreading love and happiness would be okay. Personally, I try to be a nice guy, smiling and ready to quietly make a humorous comment if the situation allows. When I am abrupt or rude to someone I usually regret it quickly.
I have always felt myself amazingly fortunate. I say that in reference to looking at about the biggest picture an individual can look at: I was born healthy, in the 20th century, in America, to good parents, in a decent suburban neighborhood. I could have been born in China in the 16th century and had worked a rice paddy for the entire 24 years of my life. I could have been born in Africa 20 years ago and lived in a constant state of threatening starvation. I could have been born with a birth defect. Perhaps where I am the most lucky is that I recognize that I am fortunate. I need to state that a lot of these emotional/mental conditions people feel have to do with psychology, brain chemistry, etc., which are almost entirely out of the control of the individual.
When you get away from both people and man-made stuff (buildings, roads, etc.), and are surrounded by God's creations (lakes, fields, big skies, places dark enough to really see all of the stars) you can start to tune into that quiet other world that gets drowned out by the noise of modern times and "civilization" (ha).
God doesn't go around yelling and shouting like foolish man does. I've never found him there. But I've definitely found him in the other places.
Aw....and a good suggestion...alone under the stars.
I do not know what is meant by "spreading happiness and love".
I have come across people who make a conscious effort to do those things and they come off
as irritating and intrusive..
Just means being nice...holding a door with a smile...
if someone is in your way saying, "Oh, that's ok, dear'', instead of scowling...being kind...
making someone's day easier.
I liked your out look on your good fortune.
Yes, that brain chemistry is a real issue....i had to go on serotonin balancing antidepressants for 6 months 20 years ago.
I do not know what is meant by "spreading happiness and love". I have come across people who make a conscious effort to do those things and they come off as irritating and intrusive. Maybe it means passing out religious literature. Sorry but that can be slightly irritating too. If it means volunteering at open shelters or doing amateur magic shows at retirement facilities, then I guess spreading love and happiness would be okay. Personally, I try to be a nice guy, smiling and ready to quietly make a humorous comment if the situation allows. When I am abrupt or rude to someone I usually regret it quickly.
Don't worry, I won't be knocking on your door anytime soon What I mean is:
Being a more loving husband, father, son, relative, friend. Being more tolerant of views. Getting great joy out of activities and enjoying those activities with others. Being considerate of others, including strangers.
You can let it get you down, or leave, or (my hope) keep posting the things that you believe are positive. Some people will get something out of it, some won't. You can also take the time to explore your feelings about this forum, and the people here, and see what that tells you about you. Maybe it's a chance to have more positive thoughts, like, "Wouldn't it be nice if somebody responded in a thoughtful way?" Then, maybe that will allow you to think, "Hey, a couple of people DID respond thoughtfully; that was nice." Then, "Wouldn't it be nice if something I posted helped people to see their own situation in a way that helped them to be truly happy?" And then maybe that would lead you to ideas for even more positive things to post. Which, really, just helped YOU in the long run, and if it helps other people in the meantime -- bonus.
Or not. You might have a much better way to approach it. But, I'm just saying that maybe you can use this forum as an opportunity to fine tune your own awakening.
Good points and I actually thought about this prior. I'm glad I've posted and I've learned a lot on here in a few short days. But I'll probably leave because it takes up a lot of time and there's too much intolerance and negativity for my taste.
Just means being nice...holding a door with a smile...
if someone is in your way saying, "Oh, that's ok, dear'', instead of scowling...being kind...
making someone's day easier.
I liked your out look on your good fortune.
Yes, that brain chemistry is a real issue....i had to go on serotonin balancing antidepressants for 6 months 20 years ago.
A person can feel happy, or sad... friendly, or angry... euphoric, or downtrodden, and whether the emotion is positive or negative, it can be attributed at least somewhat to brain chemistry. And that is out of the person's control.
I need to state that a lot of these emotional/mental conditions people feel have to do with psychology, brain chemistry, etc., which are almost entirely out of the control of the individual.
I don't want to downplay mental health or come across as insincere. I had a really tough 6 month stint myself and have loved ones who have battled mental health problems for most of their lives.
For myself, I don't feel like tossing in the towel and just leaving it up to brain chemistry or psychology that I don't understand. I want to put work into it to be more present, friendly, loving (unobtrusively ), have deep meaningful relationships, be surrounded by others who have a love for life, have a network of people I can go to when times get tough, have euphoric adrenaline producing memorable experiences. It does take work and some vulnerability, but so far I've found it to be well worth it.
I don't want to downplay mental health or come across as insincere. I had a really tough 6 month stint myself and have loved ones who have battled mental health problems for most of their lives.
For myself, I don't feel like tossing in the towel and just leaving it up to brain chemistry or psychology that I don't understand. I want to put work into it to be more present, friendly, loving (unobtrusively ), have deep meaningful relationships, be surrounded by others who have a love for life, have a network of people I can go to when times get tough, have euphoric adrenaline producing memorable experiences. It does take work and some vulnerability, but so far I've found it to be well worth it.
My point was: a lot of those thing found in your second paragraph cannot be realized by persons who are in an unhealthy psychological condition that is not of their doing.
I don't want to downplay mental health or come across as insincere. I had a really tough 6 month stint myself and have loved ones who have battled mental health problems for most of their lives.
For myself, I don't feel like tossing in the towel and just leaving it up to brain chemistry or psychology that I don't understand. I want to put work into it to be more present, friendly, loving (unobtrusively ), have deep meaningful relationships, be surrounded by others who have a love for life, have a network of people I can go to when times get tough, have euphoric adrenaline producing memorable experiences. It does take work and some vulnerability, but so far I've found it to be well worth it.
Ditto.
I can only relate my own experience, not others, obviously. I suffered with moderate to severe depression for decades, and was suicidal on many occasions. But learning how to take control of my thought life was a very healing thing. It started with stumbling across a very simple list, similar to this: "Stinkin' Thinkin". I recognized many of those thought patterns in myself, but they were SO ingrained that I was overwhelmed. But even just having the hope that it wasn't some fundamentally unchangeable flaw within me, and that I might have some control was HUGE for me. The bible verse, "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind," finally seemed like a possibility to me.
I made a little step forward here and there, and then I came across a book called, "The Worry Free Life". It wasn't perhaps the most well-written book, but at the time I read it, it was a life-line.
It's been a journey since then of finding many other tools and resources that help me continue on this path of emotional/mental/spiritual healing and I am a much more peaceful and happy person than I ever thought possible. The main thing, in my experience, has been learning that what I focus on has a profound impact on how I experience life.
I can only relate my own experience, not others, obviously. I suffered with moderate to severe depression for decades, and was suicidal on many occasions. But learning how to take control of my thought life was a very healing thing. It started with stumbling across a very simple list, similar to this: "Stinkin' Thinkin". I recognized many of those thought patterns in myself, but they were SO ingrained that I was overwhelmed. But even just having the hope that it wasn't some fundamentally unchangeable flaw within me, and that I might have some control was HUGE for me. The bible verse, "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind," finally seemed like a possibility to me.
I made a little step forward here and there, and then I came across a book called, "The Worry Free Life". It wasn't perhaps the most well-written book, but at the time I read it, it was a life-line.
It's been a journey since then of finding many other tools and resources that help me continue on this path of emotional/mental/spiritual healing and I am a much more peaceful and happy person than I ever thought possible. The main thing, in my experience, has been learning that what I focus on has a profound impact on how I experience life.
Very cool! Thanks for sharing and I'm very happy for you. I may explore the book and get it for a loved one or two who struggle with anxiety. I realize mental health is extremely complex and maybe it won't resonate with them or help, but it's worth a try.
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What I mean is:
