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Old 04-06-2008, 07:15 AM
 
Location: Western Cary, NC
4,349 posts, read 6,989,916 times
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I am not sure where to put this, but this being my most often visited site and it relating to Hell I thought this might be a good spot, and something not so acid to start a Sunday morning with. It was sent to me by another chemist, and I have loved it from the day I received it. I can't believe they say geeks have no sense of humor.


HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term.The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following.......First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in orderfor the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."This student received the only "A".

Last edited by cncracer; 04-06-2008 at 07:24 AM..
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Old 04-06-2008, 07:27 AM
 
4,898 posts, read 17,636,198 times
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i LOVE it!!!!
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Old 04-06-2008, 07:37 AM
 
Location: Look out your window.......
321 posts, read 881,886 times
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Brilliant!! I love geek comedy!!
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Old 04-06-2008, 11:07 AM
 
Location: Maryland
3,544 posts, read 6,426,686 times
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He sounds like a universalist
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Old 04-06-2008, 11:40 AM
 
Location: UK
131 posts, read 302,864 times
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v good
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Old 04-06-2008, 04:08 PM
 
2,957 posts, read 7,058,341 times
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Hell yes.
Geeks rule.
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Old 04-06-2008, 04:14 PM
 
2,633 posts, read 4,759,727 times
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geeks for the win!
Seriously though, didn't the bible specifically imply that hell is very very cold
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Old 04-06-2008, 05:05 PM
 
Location: DC Area, for now
3,517 posts, read 12,692,651 times
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But, but he never determined the mass or energy of each soul. And you need that to determine expansion rates.
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Old 04-06-2008, 07:13 PM
 
4,898 posts, read 17,636,198 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coosjoaquin View Post
geeks for the win!
Seriously though, didn't the bible specifically imply that hell is very very cold
that was Dante...
i think the bible said a firey pit
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Old 04-06-2008, 07:20 PM
 
Location: Maryland
3,544 posts, read 6,426,686 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tesaje View Post
But, but he never determined the mass or energy of each soul. And you need that to determine expansion rates.

If we can all decrease the mass of our souls and create an exothermic enviornment in hell, then.... there will be " no room at the inn"!!

So, how do I decrease my souls mass?
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