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Old 02-16-2024, 10:05 AM
 
63,775 posts, read 40,038,426 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry Diogenes View Post
So you do not believe in Hell?
How do you know these people were nonbelievers?
I agree with O'Dear on this one.
Then you could use his actual screen name out of common decency and respect, IMO. O'Darbo (or O'Darby) is correct, as are Mordant and Cruithne. Grief is not generalizable across any subsets of humanity.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:11 AM
 
Location: Germany
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MysticPhD View Post
Then you could use his actual screen name out of common decency and respect, IMO.
Quote:
Originally Posted by O'Darbo View Post
You will find in the recent "mordant's wife" thread in the Atheism & Agnosticism forum a couple of lengthy posts by me (#10 and #24), as a Christian, with my observations of the different perspectives atheists and believers bring to tragedies such as the death of a loved one. You may find them interesting (or rude, arrogant, inappropriate and all the other things they were deemed to be by the denizens of the A&A swamp).
Respect is earned.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:16 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyFarm34 View Post
As a believer in God, when someone I know passes away, I can be at peace knowing that person is no longer with us on Earth and will see that person in Heaven again someday. I don’t place blame on anyone how the person passed. And yes, I’ve had a loved one who passed tragically at a young age. I’ve could’ve blamed her ex-boyfriend, family members, old friends, Doctors…. The list goes on… She was mentally ill. It is what it is. We all leave this Earth at one point or another. To place blame on someone would only leave me being bitter and resentful. I don’t believe in dwelling on the past on the “should’ve done this or that” or holding a grudge against someone.

I’ve noticed believers tend to move on more quickly when it comes with grief moving forward with life. Maybe I’m wrong.

I’ve noticed with nonbelievers, when a loved one passes, they tend to grieve differently. Not judging how anyone grieves but that just has been my perspective. They tend to use substances like drugs and alcohol to help deal with their grief. Many tend to isolate themselves, hold grudges, find a way to place blame, and dwell on the past.
People grieve in different ways. Someday when my wife passes, if she goes before me, I will weep like a baby, probably for quite some time. But yes, I know that her trust is in the Lord, and that she will be in his presence upon drawing her final breath. And yes, that is a comfort to me.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:17 AM
 
Location: Middle America
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I might be considered a "believer", though I don't adhere to any commonly-held constraints or organizational ties.

I don't see the point in "grieving", because that won't change anything about the person's life. Sure, we can miss people, but it seems more important to celebrate the person's life and their accomplishments. We enter the "stage", do a lot over time, then exit. Hopefully we can find things to remember and appreciate while on that stage. Birth and death are just part of nature. If there's something after - which I tend to believe, but don't put any imagery or expectations on it - that's great. If not, that doesn't take away from what we can do while alive. So it can be a win either way. Priority should be on what we can all know and see, and less on hopes and expectations.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:17 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry Diogenes View Post
Respect is earned.
I hope that you and others will remember that one. It's earned.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:23 AM
 
Location: Middle America
11,061 posts, read 7,132,082 times
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Hmm. I automatically start off respecting others until they show me they deserve otherwise. I don't get why we can't respect each other simply as fellow humans. Jesus - for one - never indicated that we are to 'earn' respect, or 'earn' love.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:26 AM
 
Location: Sun City West, Arizona
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BaptistFundie View Post
I hope that you and others will remember that one. It's earned.
And I hope you will.
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Old 02-16-2024, 10:57 AM
 
63,775 posts, read 40,038,426 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thoreau424 View Post
Hmm. I automatically start off respecting others until they show me they deserve otherwise. I don't get why we can't respect each other simply as fellow humans. Jesus - for one - never indicated that we are to 'earn' respect, or 'earn' love.
Most people seem to miss that point. His scourgers and murderers certainly did not EARN His love.
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Old 02-16-2024, 11:46 AM
 
Location: NSW
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Grief is indeed a complex process.
And some other situations in life are similar to grief or loss , eg going through a divorce or being estranged from a loved one etc.
But if we look at grief as purely from the perspective of death, I’m not sure being a believer makes it any easier.
We hope that God is a merciful God and will indeed forgive any wrongdoing that that person did in this lifetime.
Of course, sometimes we may know that the deceased person was a non-believer too, so that further complicates the matter.
We can only hope that God overlooks that part of it, and is merciful.
The idea of sending people to an eternal Hell seems like an incredible waste of humanity and intelligence.
Whether we see everyone we knew again, that’s another issue.
Most people naturally like to think this happens.
But on the overall grieving process, I’m not sure being religious or a non-believer makes a huge difference.
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