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It wasn't only the wage gap. When I was married in the 70's it was my savings that allowed my then husband and I to buy a house but the bank would not allow a women to have her name on a loan even with her husband. When we divorced, I had no claim on the house and he was able to get it all.
Earlier back in the 60's, my boss threw a Christmas party at his club. The women were allowed to enter only around the back through a side door. That was humiliating.
My doctor was the only woman in her class in medical school and was treated with a lot of disdain by both male teachers and students some of whom told her she was only there to "get her man." But she never married and devoted herself to her career which was relegated to pediatrics because that was the only area where she could be accepted.
My aunt was a single mom after her husband died young. She couldn't make it on her secretary's salary even though she earned good money for that position so she moved in with her sister and together they raised my cousin.
I worked with many single moms or mothers who did not have husbands to rely on due to death of their husbands or divorce. They struggled to earn a living wage to support their kids. Their choices of good wage jobs were severely limited.
I put my spouse through graduate school. I was our only support on a "women's wage."
My mom loved being working outside the home. She was miserable being a stay at home housewife. She was happiest when she had a part-time job rather than going shopping or reading.
The point is, if women wanted to do anything other than the prescribed roles assigned to them there were many obstacles they faced that they do not have to today. I don't expect many men to understand this because they pretty much always had choices and alternatives at their disposal.
Not all women were lucky enough to be taken care of by a husband. Not all wanted to. Some were able to lead idyllic lives I am sure but there were those who had to struggle because of circumstances or the desire to be on their own.
Minervah (and Lenora, if you happen to read this post), I sincerely hope you have a good day! As for me, today I think that I shall invoke my powers as a white male and become Provost at the University of Chicago.
Married women who didn't head out to the workplace sixty years ago did not live the life of drudges. They had plenty of leisure time for shopping, reading, etc. In earlier times when they really did do hard work so too did their husbands. I find it hard to believe that the average woman today rushing to a job, to the store, to her home lives a better and happier life than the women of times past. They certainly seemed happier.
My mother was a stay-at-home Mom during the '50s and '60s. She didn't have plenty of leisure time for shopping and reading...she was too busy taking care of six kids (remember, families were a lot bigger back then) and keeping an immaculate house. Lunches for my Dad and us kids were packed every morning, a home-cooked dinner was prepared every evening. Dishes were washed by hand, as my Mom didn't get a dishwasher until the late '60s.
I don't recall when she got a dryer, but I do remember her hanging wash out on the line (including tons of cloth diapers), even in the winter. No such thing as permanent-press, so she had lots of ironing...heck, she even ironed pillowcases and my Dad's handkerchiefs. Socks were darned by hand, clothing was mended on the sewing machine.
Mom took care of paying the bills, and the checkbook was balanced to the penny. As they say, she could squeeze a nickel and have a dime pop out.
So there you have it...another view of the life of a woman who didn't head out to the workplace.
My mother was a stay-at-home Mom during the '50s and '60s. She didn't have plenty of leisure time for shopping and reading...she was too busy taking care of six kids (remember, families were a lot bigger back then) and keeping an immaculate house. Lunches for my Dad and us kids were packed every morning, a home-cooked dinner was prepared every evening. Dishes were washed by hand, as my Mom didn't get a dishwasher until the late '60s.
I don't recall when she got a dryer, but I do remember her hanging wash out on the line (including tons of cloth diapers), even in the winter. No such thing as permanent-press, so she had lots of ironing...heck, she even ironed pillowcases and my Dad's handkerchiefs. Socks were darned by hand, clothing was mended on the sewing machine.
Mom took care of paying the bills, and the checkbook was balanced to the penny. As they say, she could squeeze a nickel and have a dime pop out.
So there you have it...another view of the life of a woman who didn't head out to the workplace.
There have always been people who just can't resist having what they can't afford. For your parents it was six children. Today it might be six vacations or six color televisions or a big house they bought a few years ago on an option ARM. But it's all irresponsible behavior.
I was an only child. Most of the children I knew were from families of two or three children. One of our neighbors was a family of eight children. But they were able to afford a full-time maid as well as a laundress. In general, however, it seemed that large families lived an unpleasant and distressed life. The adults suffered because they were overworked with the light at the end of the tunnel far away. The children suffered because of inattention, lack of personal possessions, and most because of poorer educational opportunities. So many of those people had nothing, but they could always have another child. Think how different both your life and the life of parents would have been if your parents had had a smaller family they could afford.
In those days before automatic washers and dryers were standard there were many commercial laundries offering home pickup and delivery. Everyone I knew sent out linen and large items even after they bought automatic washers and dryers. There were specialty laundries that handled diapers, again offering pickup and delivery. It wasn't until the next generation that people really started doing their own laundry.
Life is what people make of it. That was true fifty to seventy years ago; it's true today.
My mom had a washing machine but never a drier. We always lived in large apartment buildings that allowed people to put their own washers in the basement. There were clotheslines outside and inside. Each tenant had their own wash day so they could have the use of all the clotheslines. I remember her first washer was a ringer one.
I live in a small building now with a large backyard that has clotheslines as does our basement. All the young people as well as the older folks like me use them. We do have a drier but everyone seems to prefer the clotheslines. Probably to save money on the drier but also there is nothing like the smell of sheets having been dried outside in the sunshine.
I was born in 1944 and lived in St. Louis until 1958. It's funny how we can "forget" some things that we haven't thought about for a long time. The mention of a white/male column in the want ads was therefore jarring to me. I thought, "Oh damn, I vaguely remember that!" We have come so far from those times - such a thing is just so impossible to imagine today.
A related example, which I have always retained more clearly in memory, is the white and colored signs on drinking fountains at gas stations, and the existence of three restrooms: "Men", "women", and "colored". St. Louis was too far north to have those, but when we took road trips to visit our grandparents in Lousiana we would see such things as we traveled further south. Those are childhood memories, of course. I do not remember when the racial designations for restrooms and water fountains disappeared. Nor do I remember how far south we had to drive before seeing them; it's possible that this practice even existed in southern Missouri. But it was certainly prevalent in Arkansas, Mississippi, and Louisiana.
My grandpa was born in Washington Missouri in 1939, and he said he remembers seperate bathrooms, and in the movie theater colored people could only sit in the balcony. He also said colored people weren't allowed to move off of 1st first street, and that in Hermann the city limits sign said that all black people had to be out of town by sun set. Those were days to be forgotten.
There have always been people who just can't resist having what they can't afford. For your parents it was six children. Today it might be six vacations or six color televisions or a big house they bought a few years ago on an option ARM. But it's all irresponsible behavior.
I was an only child. Most of the children I knew were from families of two or three children. One of our neighbors was a family of eight children. But they were able to afford a full-time maid as well as a laundress. In general, however, it seemed that large families lived an unpleasant and distressed life. The adults suffered because they were overworked with the light at the end of the tunnel far away. The children suffered because of inattention, lack of personal possessions, and most because of poorer educational opportunities. So many of those people had nothing, but they could always have another child. Think how different both your life and the life of parents would have been if your parents had had a smaller family they could afford.
In those days before automatic washers and dryers were standard there were many commercial laundries offering home pickup and delivery. Everyone I knew sent out linen and large items even after they bought automatic washers and dryers. There were specialty laundries that handled diapers, again offering pickup and delivery. It wasn't until the next generation that people really started doing their own laundry.
Life is what people make of it. That was true fifty to seventy years ago; it's true today.
You're right, of course. My parents stuffed 4 children into a 1000 square foot home. What were they thinking?! Surely they only had enough love for one or two children. Perhaps if they had limited themselves to one child, that child could have grown up to be a psychic consultant, just like you! Bummer!
There have always been people who just can't resist having what they can't afford. For your parents it was six children. Today it might be six vacations or six color televisions or a big house they bought a few years ago on an option ARM. But it's all irresponsible behavior.
I was an only child. Most of the children I knew were from families of two or three children.
I take it you weren't in an area with many Catholic families. For them it was the norm. Of course the Catholic church still doesn't want people to use birth control, but today there are methods that work much better and people think for themselves more (a concept that many people who would like to return to the 50's find unfortunate). I was an only child too, and felt very freakish for it. A number of people (not just talking about Catholics here) told my mother how selfish it was to make someone be an only child. Different was not good then, even over something so relatively unimportant.
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Life is what people make of it. That was true fifty to seventy years ago; it's true today.
On this we're agreed. And there actually are a lot of things I liked about those days, I just don't think we should look at them as an idyllic time. Some things have gotten worse since then, some much better.
Perhaps if they had limited themselves to one child, that child could have grown up to be a psychic consultant, just like you! Bummer!
Thank you. Someone read your post and contacted me about a reading. I got two callers the last time you mentioned it. One has called back several times.
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Originally Posted by subject2change
I take it you weren't in an area with many Catholic families. For them it was the norm. Of course the Catholic church still doesn't want people to use birth control, but today there are methods that work much better and people think for themselves more (a concept that many people who would like to return to the 50's find unfortunate). I was an only child too, and felt very freakish for it. A number of people (not just talking about Catholics here) told my mother how selfish it was to make someone be an only child. Different was not good then, even over something so relatively unimportant.
Different is never good; it frightens the herd.
I know that gynecologists did sterilize women at that time. But I suspect it was one of those deep dark secrets.
I never felt odd as an only child. Since that was the only life I knew I accepted it as the norm. Once someone asked me if I felt odd because my parents were both forty when I was born. I'd never given it a thought. Studies have shown that the only child does well because of more association with adults and less with other children. I married a girl who was an only child as well; I doubt that it was a coincidence. I think someone may have told my mother about the selfishness or mistake of having only one child. But I have only a vague memory of her mentioning it and laughing.
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Originally Posted by subject2change
On this we're agreed. And there actually are a lot of things I liked about those days, I just don't think we should look at them as an idyllic time. Some things have gotten worse since then, some much better.
I agree. But as I said in an earlier post that while technology has improved the social and political areas of our society have deteriorated. Overall, I'd prefer the world of sixty years ago just as it was then.
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Originally Posted by R.A.P
and that in Hermann the city limits sign said that all black people had to be out of town by sun set.
I've heard that one for so long and about so many places; never seeing a shred of evidence I have relegated it to the status of legend.
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Someone read your post and contacted me about a reading. I got two callers the last time you mentioned it. One has called back several times.
