Why Don't Retired People Entertain? (alcohol, friends, years, married)
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The retired people I've met don't seem to entertain much. Is this common? Do people in their late 60's and 70's give up entertaining friends at home? (And only do family occasions?)
If you are retired, do you like to entertain?
We've had people to our home for dinner and some reciprocate and some don't.
The retired people I've met don't seem to entertain much. Is this common? Do people in their late 60's and 70's give up entertaining friends at home? (And only do family occasions?)
If you are retired, do you like to entertain?
We've had people to our home for dinner and some reciprocate and some don't.
Maybe they are "entertained" out. When we are younger we are very social and do a LOT of things so by the time you reach a certain age you're just "tired". Not everyone NEEDS to be constantly entertaining and having people over. Maybe they just like their peace and quiet. I LOVE having people over but not many people seem inclined. My family are about the only ones who DO come over and I enjoy spending time with them.
Many retirees are on a tight budget, remember. It is very expensive to entertain...everything from alcoholic beverages (a variety of), alternative drinks, the appetizers and foods, new table linens if needed, etc. can cost several hundred bucks or more. Not to mention having to clean the house spotlessly, and clean up afterward....a lot to do for retirees who are health challenged or of low energy.
Retirees of means and physical energy have a much easier time of entertaining; but those who are invited who are not of easy means are obligated to reciprocate, which for the above reasons can present difficulty.
My mother was very social and had many friends. She entertained for decades and would go the full 9 yards: booze, food, party favors, etc.
However, by her mid-70's almost all her friends had died and the remaining were too old to go out anymore. She is now 89 and all her friends, sadly, are long since dead. She said to me recently, "I would still like to entertain, but I have no one to invite."
I think all the reasons mentioned are part of it. I was always the one to do the entertaining - but I learned this from my mother. She loved to give to her friends and family and put a lot of effort into it.
But, other people were raised differently and even though they loved to come they never returned the favor. One day I just stopped. It was expensive and it was a lot of work and even though I loved to do it I began to believe many are just too lazy and just too cheap. It's a matter of priorities - they would rather spend that $$ on a new outfit or something else. It wasn't a matter of money - we were all in the same boat financially - I was rather poor when I started having get togethers.
I started getting calls "Why don't you have your parties anymore?" I would respond with "Why have you never bothered to have any?" Silence~~~
So, as people get older, there are many reasons. The people I mentioned haven't changed or people have limited $$ or~~~or~~~or. But if you think about it - if everyone brings something, it doesn't have to be a hugh financial burden to the host and it doesn't have to be fancy. Unless your home is a real pig pen, cleaning doesn't have to be that big a deal - I use to make it a big deal, but I have since calmed down.
And as another thread has mentioned - some just get bored and boring.
We are having 6 people over for Roasted Goose today but as we were preparing we said to each other, man, this is work. We are retied. Work to us is a nasty word....LOL
I prefer a small group, bring a dish, have a drink, eat off paper plates, Chinese takeout, etc. so little to no work/pressure on anyone just enjoyment for all.
For sure!! and being on our own, we don't have to take a bath, put on makeup, clean the house, etc. all that stuff it takes to "entertain".
On a serious note all the comments have merit. I entertained well and lavishly (sit down dinner parties) for years when I was married to a university dept head. It was fun then but it was WORK! Sadly, most of my friends are dead but I still enjoy simple dinner parties with the two or three remaining.
We are having 6 people over for Roasted Goose today but as we were preparing we said to each other, man, this is work. We are retied. Work to us is a nasty word....LOL
I prefer a small group, bring a dish, have a drink, eat off paper plates, Chinese takeout, etc. so little to no work/pressure on anyone just enjoyment for all.
Better to make it a pizza and beer party (we'll buy the pizza, you guys bring the six-packs) and let everyone off the hook work-wise. Informal can let everyone relax and just be who they are.
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