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I have exactly the same problem and I'm female. There are so many anomalies in my background and belief system, finding friends is very difficult indeed: vegan, animal rights, feminist, atheist, academic, TALL. I teach and have to hide my books: Russell, Dawkins, Harris. _Why I am Not a Christian_ doesn't go over too well in this ultraconservative community I live in.
I can't believe some posters are criticizing or blaming you. People are idiots. See: Bell Curve.
If your post is any indication, your condescending attitude towards others who don 't share your perspectives is what is likely offputting for any potential friends. Because no matter what a person's beliefs happen to be, it's how they treat others that really matters.
What evangelicals don't get is that many people who associate themselves as aethiests do believe in a higher power and are quite spiritual. It's organized religion we've got no use for. And much of that stems from the horrible example set by your average bible thumper. This thread has become another sad example of that.
If your post is any indication, your condescending attitude towards others who don 't share your perspectives is what is likely offputting for any potential friends. Because no matter what a person's beliefs happen to be, it's how they treat others that really matters.
I detect no condescending attitude. How interesting, how threatened people become.
You know, I can't remember the last time I had a conversation with anyone (in person) about politics OR religion. It just doesn't concern me any more. I figure that there is just stupidity I can't control out there, so let it be. If they've lived this long with such idiotic views, they will likely make it to the finish line without me to correct them. Nobody bothers me to find out where I stand on such issues.
If you are posting on the retirement board, I assume you are retired or close to it. That is plenty old enough to have a near-lifetime of dealing with these issues, and the experience to handle it easily. If you do not, then you may wish to examine just who it is - you or the others - that causes this discord. I never feel that anyone is trying to find where I stand on the issues. And I don't try to hide anything. Could you be the one who initiates such discussions, in your zeal to find a kindred soul?
I am with you; must be the people or place she lives.
I am with you; must be the people or place she lives.
I think it is her liberal beliefs. I know, because I have them. You don't identify as a liberal unless you have given it some thought. Some of us are passionate about our concern about where we think the country is headed. I don't want to get off on a tangent about whether we are right or wrong or get into too many specifics. We think we are right and we think it is important. So when topics come up in conversation, we don't just ignore them. We state our opinions. Several of you indicated a desire to just push the conversation in a different direction at that point and I am okay with that. Sometimes I ask a question that pushes someone's buttons. For example if someone says they don't think we need a minimum wage I ask them if they think that some workers don't deserve a wage high enough to be able to meet basic living expenses because the job they do isn't important enough. This makes some people uncomfortable and even though I will follow a subject change and discuss the sad state of our local pro sports team or what is biting down at the pier, they are less likely to engage in further discussions with me or become my bosom buddy.
The point of that is I think it is okay to be passionate about what you believe. It is also okay not to. But those who are will have trouble making friends with different beliefs unless they are really open minded.
Here at least we call it stirring the pot.Most such people like conflict :IMO. I avoid them.
I don't disagree. My point was that some of us think the pot needs to be stirred. I think those of us who feel that way are better off finding good friends that agree with our positions or enjoy a lively debate rather than trying to keep quiet to find friends, if keeping quiet isn't really "who we are".
<snip> But as a conservative who works in a very liberal field, if I were to express my true beliefs to my colleagues, people I consider "work friends" (that is, close acquaintances), I would most likely be shunned. <snip>
Find a local group of hippie dippies, the local Democratic party group, a Unitarian "church," or the local health food shop <snip>
Seriously? I wonder why in the world you believe you would be shunned...
It looks like there are two sides to this bigotry coin.
And where are the posters on this thread who have chided others for not playing nice? Hmmm.
I am retired, single, and don't live around any seniors right now but plan to move away next year. I have trouble finding girlfriends because I keep running into opinionated people. I try to be super non committal about religion and politics, but they sniff around to see where I stand and once they finally, finally find out (I'm an atheist/agnostic and a very liberal democrat), they drop me.
Part of this is due to the conservative town that I live in, I think, and I hope to remedy that but is there any way to tactfully avoid the subject of religion and politics indefinitely unless I can find someone who shares my opinions?
P.S. I've tried joining groups around these subjects and that hasn't worked where I live; one group is all male college students, and the other is tiny, full of busy women who don't have time for a single retired woman.
P.P.S. Is this an uncommon problem? I can't tell if it's mostly just the town I live in!
Here in land the public schools pray in public. Religious people do not respect others. They are just bullies.
Funny, as I got older I got wiser and became more liberal.
I doubt I've become any wiser but I have become more moderate. It hasn't hurt a bit!
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Me Too:
land the public schools pray in public. 
Religious people do not respect others. 
