Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
One big one - you mentioned your wife and daughter and quoted a lot of factors but never mentioned "family". Where they are and where lifelong friends are is a big deal to many of us. It isn't a factor for everyone and it appears it wasn't for you. But a lot of us are torn between the location that has the weather and recreation we want and where the people we want to see often are.
My opinion: If you had to move away from home because of work, and have been away from home for a long time, the urge to move back is lessened when it's time to retire.
... One big one - you mentioned your wife and daughter and quoted a lot of factors but never mentioned "family". Where they are and where lifelong friends are is a big deal to many of us. It isn't a factor for everyone and it appears it wasn't for you. But a lot of us are torn between the location that has the weather and recreation we want and where the people we want to see often are.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LauraC
My opinion: If you had to move away from home because of work, and have been away from home for a long time, the urge to move back is lessened when it's time to retire.
Everyone is different.
I attended my 25th highschool reunion, in Central California. From a graduating class of 700+ only a handful of us had ever "spread our wings" and left the area. Our class has it's own facebook page with over 150 of our classmates on it. I am aware of three of us who settled elsewhere.
My classmates can not bear to leave their families; the streets where they learned to drive on; the community, etc. The National Parks that they went to as children are the same places that they took their children to, and the same they are now taking their grandchildren to. The rivalries between highschools of neighboring counties [football, basketball, wrestling, marching bands] are still the on-going conversation.
The same could be said of my siblings. My brothers left when they were drafted, after they were discharged they returned home. My sisters left for colleges and returned. They all settled within 50 miles of their birthplace.
I went back to visit annually for the first few years, I went back to attend college. Now I go back for funerals.
Living other places totally cured me of any desire I may have had to settle in my hometown.
My opinion: If you had to move away from home because of work, and have been away from home for a long time, the urge to move back is lessened when it's time to retire.
A little tangent about that - the rise of social media has allowed me to reconnect with a lot of people I had largely lost touch with from where I lived for most of my childhood and early adulthood. In some cases, it has saved us the trouble of trying to connect in person; it is obvious that life took us to different places more than just geographically. Some people I would love to visit with have also moved away and some are still there. But for the majority of people I knew long ago and have not seen recently, social media is enough. it's not like I never go back for a visit.
Hi Suzee8: In reference to your post above this one, I can so relate to wanting to get out of where you are. I hope you and DH find a place you both agree to and make the move.
Your stressful circumstances do not sound like much fun and I sure can relate to you wanting to leave them behind. Where I live now, same area I have lived most of my life, is loaded with really bad memories. When I wanted to move to NC, I think my main reason was to escape them and make new ones. But in reality, I doubt you can ever be free of the bad memories. No matter where we are, it's up to us to do something about them.
Good luck to you! Nothing wrong with wanting peace quiet. That is important to me, too.
NYgal, if it is any help to you I have lived both in your present location and NC. I am not as familiar with Winston-Salem which you were considering, but know people who live near there. I think you made the correct choice to stay put when you state your circumstances. Unless you made a true effort or had certain interests which would get you into some groups for socializing, it might be difficult to make friends in that area. It can be very church-oriented, if that would be an interest.
Someplace like the Raleigh area has many more transplants and would be easier to fit in and adjust. However, it has become quite expensive and unfortunately funds have been cut to support many groups, including seniors.
I wish you the best and hope you have a beautiful, breezy summer. I still find 3 months of intense humidity tough to take!
NYgal, if it is any help to you I have lived both in your present location and NC. I am not as familiar with Winston-Salem which you were considering, but know people who live near there. I think you made the correct choice to stay put when you state your circumstances. Unless you made a true effort or had certain interests which would get you into some groups for socializing, it might be difficult to make friends in that area. It can be very church-oriented, if that would be an interest.
Someplace like the Raleigh area has many more transplants and would be easier to fit in and adjust. However, it has become quite expensive and unfortunately funds have been cut to support many groups, including seniors.
I wish you the best and hope you have a beautiful, breezy summer. I still find 3 months of intense humidity tough to take!
Your comments about the Raleigh Triangle are very accurate and need to be clear to folks considering. The nice areas of Wilmington are becoming expensive. It is provably easier and more of an attraction for transplants and maybe not so much for long timers.
Your comments about the Raleigh Triangle are very accurate and need to be clear to folks considering. The nice areas of Wilmington are becoming expensive. It is provably easier and more of an attraction for transplants and maybe not so much for long timers.
There are still some reasonable outlying areas of Raleigh, but inside 540 there are not a lot of low cost choices. Wilmington becoming expensive? When was it cheap? In and around the historic district in the walkable part has always been pretty high. The corridor toward CB where Landfall is has definitely gone really upscale in the last several years. It would be easier to retire there if you had NY or CA home equity and a nice income stream.
The Johnston County side is becoming more expensive as expected and soon could accelerate. Lots going in around Garner on 70 and White Oak area shopping is becoming enormous. Good uptick in Medical Services. The Wrightsville Beach area is building up and the Previously undeveloped area of Leyland with Brunswick Forest, St James Plantation and mire taking off and expensive. Much of this survived the Great Recession.
Not all that long ago I found some info on a new neighborhood out that way (Garner/Clayton) that was very reasonable and had elder friendly layouts.. But due to how things are going at work and home, looking local is probably a waste of time.
When I read threads like this I feel very happy that we love where we already are! I am a FL native, and love this state. We are living in a house, neighborhood and city that we are the happiest we have ever been. I am retired, and my hubby has 4 more years. The only move we would make (IF we even do this) is to a town 30 miles north. We have everything we want here. We have many friends here. Family is in midwest, but not a factor. I consider cost of living pretty low, and we have a good pension/retireent.
I hope everyone can find what suits them best.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
