This Is the Retirement Regret Nobody Talks About - Time article (community, retirees)
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I wanted to retire at 59. For various reasons that wasn't feasible and I will finally pull the plug at 63. Waiting will allow me to be very comfortable financially, more so than if I'd retired earlier, but to be honest there are days when I wish I was done with work now. Actually, most days. I only have about 8 months to go and I count down the days.
My wife, who is 55 says I'll get bored and need "a purpose". I disagree. I've had a purpose my whole working life and now I just want to enjoy my time doing whatever. I can be perfectly happy doing something or doing nothing.
Yes, I wish I could have retired sooner but it is what it is. Having regrets will get you nowhere. Retirement will be awesome because that's the way I want it to be.
Ask someone who's lived past 90 in good shape if they regret not working half their lives. Retirement is great until you get too much of it.
My parents retired at age 58 (dad) and age 61 (mom). My mom's only regret was she didn't retire with my dad but she was 3 years younger.
They both lived to 95 in very good shape and independently in their home of 55, with no outside help except a lawn service. My mother had worried about my dad dropping dead of work-related stress. She always felt their early retirement gave them so many extra years of good living. They were so happy working around their house and yard, traveling to FL every winter, socializing with friends and visiting their children and grandchildren.
They had many interests, enjoyed sports and my mother kept limber with knitting. Everyone always remarked on how serene and peaceful they were. My husband and I also retired before 65, to our great relief. Some people do not enjoy a stressful environment and are thrilled with peace, calm and following their own interests
We never missed being "needed" or important to anyone in the workforce. We would much rather spend time with each other, our children and some other special folks of our choosing.
My parents retired at age 58 (dad) and age 61 (mom). My mom's only regret was she didn't retire with my dad but she was 3 years younger.
They both lived to 95 in very good shape and independently in their home of 55, with no outside help except a lawn service. My mother had worried about my dad dropping dead of work-related stress. She always felt their early retirement gave them so many extra years of good living. They were so happy working around their house and yard, traveling to FL every winter, socializing with friends and visiting their children and grandchildren.
They had many interests, enjoyed sports and my mother kept limber with knitting. Everyone always remarked on how serene and peaceful they were. My husband and I also retired before 65, to our great relief. Some people do not enjoy a stressful environment and are thrilled with peace, calm and following their own interests
We never missed being "needed" or important to anyone in the workforce. We would much rather spend time with each other, our children and some other special folks of our choosing.
So inspiring...love posts like this....my identity or my "purpose" was/is never my job....never will be....
We never missed being "needed" or important to anyone in the workforce. We would much rather spend time with each other, our children and some other special folks of our choosing.
I do think that for 90% (maybe more) of the workplace we are ENTIRELY expendable. No one is really going to miss us as people or the work that we do and to believe otherwise is to delude yourself. There are plenty of cogs out there that will manage around us just fine. Maybe I'm being cynical but I really think it's just realistic - most of work is just not all that special.
I wanted to retire at 59. For various reasons that wasn't feasible and I will finally pull the plug at 63. Waiting will allow me to be very comfortable financially, more so than if I'd retired earlier, but to be honest there are days when I wish I was done with work now. Actually, most days. I only have about 8 months to go and I count down the days.
My wife, who is 55 says I'll get bored and need "a purpose". I disagree. I've had a purpose my whole working life and now I just want to enjoy my time doing whatever. I can be perfectly happy doing something or doing nothing.
Yes, I wish I could have retired sooner but it is what it is. Having regrets will get you nowhere. Retirement will be awesome because that's the way I want it to be.
My wife also got bored with retirement after just two years. Now she is doing contract work for her old employer and will be doing it full time as soon the other person retires in about 12 months. As for me, I have no desire to go back to work.
Ask someone who's lived past 90 in good shape if they regret not working half their lives. Retirement is great until you get too much of it.
Have'em check with me in about 38 years......no doubt in my mind the answer will be the same.....retire early, do what you want whenever you want (even if it's nothing), don't identify yourself by your job or think you're more important because of it and stay working because "that's what people do stay relevant" (as if anyone really cares about one's esteemed "career"..LOL).
I recall our habitual retiree that did some consult work for our business. He was 72 the first time he announced full retirement. A year later he comes back willing to work. so we gave him odd jobs... 7 months later he "retires" again...This process went on for five years... Each time he'd say .. Okay I'm really retiring this time!
Well finally the owner decided to release him and pretty much told him to go enjoy life.
The reality was... He had already fixed everything on his wife's honey do list and there was only so many times you can clean the gutters and cut the grass. He was so bored ... Work gave him a purpose... One of the few men I have met and worked with that understood how to be a gentlemen... Such a lost art.
My wife also got bored with retirement after just two years. Now she is doing contract work for her old employer and will be doing it full time as soon the other person retires in about 12 months. As for me, I have no desire to go back to work.
This. No two people are the same, and different people derive satisfaction from different things. Anyone in this forum claiming retirees will need some structure to replace work is wrong, as is anyone claiming the opposite.
My wife and I are going on about a year and a half retired and I have found no need for structure sense of purpose, hand me a fishing rod or let me go traveling to places I've never been and I'm fine. Wife is slightly different she's taken more to learning new stuff in a structured manner which I suspect is filling some gap left with no work. No two snowflakes etc.
Is it not purpose enough to follow up on hobbies you couldn't enjoy before? I plan to splurge on a "professional" home weather station and do in-depth statistical analysis of my own weather data and of weather datasets available online. I'm also going to start making the hundreds of recipes I've been collecting but didn't have time to shop for the esoteric ingredients, much less actually make them! Sooooo - is that a problem? Should I be volunteering somewhere? Working part time? What?! Maybe I'll just do stuff that I actually WANT to do. I'm not a hard-driving Calvinist now and I sure won't be once I retire!
Quote:
Originally Posted by FREE866
Right on...People are so conditioned to "have to be doing something" these days..
That gets my vote too. Sometimes I think people are pushed into believing they have to do something all of the time and it has to be selfless acts of do-gooding or creating something wonderful. This is true especially after they retire because, heaven forbid, anyone should just stop and enjoy being idle or dabbling in small endeavors that satisfies them and them alone.
What's wrong with just being? My dad retired and took up what he always wanted to do, read, take walks and meet with friends. He was one of the happiest retirees I knew once my mom gave up trying to get him to do something "worthwhile."
He did drive friends to doctor's appointments and shopping when they could no longer drive and he still could. But he enjoyed doing that. He had been doing that even before he retired.
When are people going to stop listening to what's expected of them to do at every stage of life?
When someone retires, if just sitting and watching the sunset makes them happy, more power to them.
It depends on how stressful your job is. If it is an easy, less stressful job, why not continue working as long as you get vacation days. If you don't like your career or job, then i can see the reason for early retirement or finding another job. My friend is a database manager. He said once he reaches 55, he will find a much less stressful lower paying job. Not worth the stress for him.
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