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Old 03-08-2017, 03:05 PM
 
8,226 posts, read 3,421,135 times
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Oh, and they also worry we will try to steal their husbands!
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Old 03-08-2017, 03:45 PM
 
3,782 posts, read 4,248,699 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by old fed View Post
single/living alone for a long time, retired for a much shorter time. moved away from family. wouldn't change a thing.
This old fed agrees with your assessment. My old job did not work well with a marriage.
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Old 03-08-2017, 04:13 PM
 
Location: Central NY
5,947 posts, read 5,112,753 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fallstaff View Post
C'mon. Context. "Everybody" used idiomatically in that sense does not mean 7.5 billion people on the planet earth. It means it's frustratingly common and recurring


Wowie, you are so smart!!! Thank you for clearing that up for me.
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Old 03-08-2017, 05:00 PM
 
703 posts, read 612,799 times
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Originally Posted by NYgal1542 View Post
Wowie, you are so smart!!! Thank you for clearing that up for me.
Hey, you gave me reason to doubt
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Old 03-08-2017, 05:52 PM
 
Location: Sylmar, a part of Los Angeles
8,342 posts, read 6,428,879 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Good4Nothin View Post
Oh, and one other thing -- being married makes you seem more respectable. It means there is at least one person on earth who wants to be with you.

If you are single, everyone wonders if maybe you are gay, or maybe you are mentally ill, or maybe you are impossible to get along with.

So screw 'em, I have to not care what they think.
Or in my case poor social skills that I just can't seem to improve. And afraid to ask a lady I like on a date as I have a hard time talking to people I don't know very well.
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Old 03-08-2017, 06:02 PM
 
8,226 posts, read 3,421,135 times
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Originally Posted by V8 Vega View Post
Or in my case poor social skills that I just can't seem to improve. And afraid to ask a lady I like on a date as I have a hard time talking to people I don't know very well.
If you really want to have a relationship, I am sure you could manage to find one. Social skills are like any kind of skills -- you can learn them, and they will improve with practice. You have to kind of force yourself though.

There are more women than men in the older ages, so you have a great advantage. Try to be in places where there are women. If you are the only guy surrounded by girls, they will ask you out, don't worry.

It all depends on if you want a relationship or not. If you don't care, then don't worry about it. If you do care, you just have to change your ways, make up your mind, and then get started doing it. Any time you try something different you will feel afraid. You have to ignore the fear and just plunge ahead.

Oh I know I sound like a motivational speaker, which I most definitely am not. I just have been through so much of this in my life, changing habits and trying to be better, etc. It isn't as hard as you would think.
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Old 03-09-2017, 12:36 AM
 
1,493 posts, read 1,520,316 times
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First of all drop the Good4Nothin moniker. Way too negative. "Positive Things Happen To Positive People"

Then forget about Mr. Wrong II. Keep your eyes open for Mr. Right. May take time but he's out there.

Sounds to me like other than the above you are doing a good job.

As for finding someone to share bills with. Be careful, if you marry someone his bills become yours. I have witnessed too many friends put themselves in worse financial positions just because they had to have a woman. Kids for one. Kids from past relationships can be a major financial burden. And things are not getting any better in this country..
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Old 03-09-2017, 01:10 AM
 
Location: A State of Mind
6,611 posts, read 3,673,255 times
Reputation: 6388
Quote:
Originally Posted by Good4Nothin View Post
It sounds like the most pathetic thing in the world -- an old single lady. But is it really?

I was married during my twenties, to Mr. Wrong. What a miserable experience that was! When that (mercifully) ended, I fell in love with Mr. Wrong II, who was not willing or able to marry me and make my life heaven.

I had to do everything for myself -- figure out how to make money, decide where to live, get the car fixed, etc., etc. It was not easy and it was not fun, but we are programmed to survive.

I changed careers, went back to school, lived on very little, saved money. It was all difficult but in some ways rewarding, and nice to know I could survive without any help from anyone. Meanwhile, my mother became disabled and I had that responsibility on top of everything else. And my siblings were just what you'd expect -- no help at all!

So now, I am semi-retired, I have friends and hobbies and interests and it's pretty great having some time for things I love doing. Still seeing Mr. Wrong II, maybe once a week, and he still doesn't help much with anything.

So, sometimes I tell myself -- if I were MARRIED, my rent plus utilities would be only HALF what they are now. And my life would be much EASIER.

So let's just say I convinced Mr. Wrong II, or some other poor sucker, to marry me -- would it be worth it?

My rent + utilities is about $1200/month, and with a husband it would be about $600. $600/month is $5,000/year. That's all I'm really losing, not such a big deal, imo.

And what do I get for that $5,000/year? No one to bicker with. No TV blasting constantly in the background. No one asking me where I'm going and when I'll be back. No one being careless with money and running up the credit cards.

Ok, so what do you think? Is all that worth $5,000/year?
YES!! I personally would not want to be in a situation which would interfere my own comfort and sanity. It's not worth it, but probably many do it. I will see or hear of situations and think, there is not enough money to make me want to live without having peace and tranquility. I have said I would rather be content than being lonlier in another's presence and have it alter who I am. If some are so mutually-bonded that it works and does not detract from each being who they are, then good for them.
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Old 03-09-2017, 05:28 AM
 
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
10,930 posts, read 11,723,439 times
Reputation: 13170
Quote:
Originally Posted by Good4Nothin View Post
It sounds like the most pathetic thing in the world -- an old single lady. But is it really?

I was married during my twenties, to Mr. Wrong. What a miserable experience that was! When that (mercifully) ended, I fell in love with Mr. Wrong II, who was not willing or able to marry me and make my life heaven.

I had to do everything for myself -- figure out how to make money, decide where to live, get the car fixed, etc., etc. It was not easy and it was not fun, but we are programmed to survive.

I changed careers, went back to school, lived on very little, saved money. It was all difficult but in some ways rewarding, and nice to know I could survive without any help from anyone. Meanwhile, my mother became disabled and I had that responsibility on top of everything else. And my siblings were just what you'd expect -- no help at all!

So now, I am semi-retired, I have friends and hobbies and interests and it's pretty great having some time for things I love doing. Still seeing Mr. Wrong II, maybe once a week, and he still doesn't help much with anything.

So, sometimes I tell myself -- if I were MARRIED, my rent plus utilities would be only HALF what they are now. And my life would be much EASIER.

So let's just say I convinced Mr. Wrong II, or some other poor sucker, to marry me -- would it be worth it?

My rent + utilities is about $1200/month, and with a husband it would be about $600. $600/month is $5,000/year. That's all I'm really losing, not such a big deal, imo.

And what do I get for that $5,000/year? No one to bicker with. No TV blasting constantly in the background. No one asking me where I'm going and when I'll be back. No one being careless with money and running up the credit cards.

Ok, so what do you think? Is all that worth $5,000/year?
Since you are a miser, of course you would not be happy.
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Old 03-09-2017, 06:28 AM
 
505 posts, read 716,583 times
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Originally Posted by Good4Nothin View Post
Oh, and they also worry we will try to steal their husbands!
That has happened to me, the funny thing was I really didn't even like that persons husband.
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