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Still working, tons of hours but my husband and I tell each other that our minds are busy and we both feel productive.
This time of year, his office sees clients for their taxes. We see several clients during the whole year b/c CPA work is a year round business but those we only see once or twice a year, you can see a difference.
The attitude is the thing. He has a client who worked (self employed) until he was 94; his wife was 87 - lovely couple - they were so positive always; delightful to be around.
The sad ones are the ones who talk about their aches and pains and we listen but it does leave you feeling sad - for them. Note - a lot of times - we see those who have gained weight, lost momentum and on way too much medication.
This is a renovation year for me - a little delayed but a wake up call. My FIL passed in January 2017 and we have a lot of work to do on his house (renovation), another condo we had (more renovation but almost done) and our own home - BUT mostly on ourselves. Time to really get in shape.
My 2 children are CrossFit addicts. They tell me stories of women in their 70's and 80's - not there yet but I want to always be looking ahead to enjoying something. Because of working so much, I haven't had time for a real social life and even going to the movies, I always get excited. I never take it for granted.
In February 2017, I broke my foot and ankle - reinforcing the get in shape soon idea. My daughter has mentioned to me several times that if I had more strength training, it would have been easier on me or healed more quickly. She is correct.
So, I choose to be more positive. Glass half full.
A friend of mine told me that it's when friends your age start dying of natural/disease causes. That struck a chord with me, but I think for many of us that's in our 50's :-(. I do think it has a lot to do with attitude. If you act like you've given up & are just waiting around to die, you're old to me. That can happen in the 50's or 60's or in the 90's or not at all.
My parents are in their early 70's. They hate to leave the house & try not to, they have no interest in learning anything new, if you suggest doing anything to them, they'll give you a million excuses why they can't. If you suggest a change that may improve their lives, they'll say "that's just the way I am, deal with it". They have no interest in exercising, they don't want to have friends. They're old. And sad. My MIL is in her 90's & had to sell her house & move into a Sr. apartment. She has a vibrant social life, loves to read, likes to go places. Yeah, she's chronologically old, but keeping your mind active is a way to keep young. I see it with my parents. They have practically become shut ins & so they have lost many of their skills. To the point that one of them thinks they have memory issues, but it's really clear to family members, that it's simply lack of socialization.
Chronologically, I'd have to say around 80. Realistically, the mind has a LOT to do with it. Use it or lose it is definitely true, I've even seen it in myself & friends my own age (50's).
Someone who is in their early 70s and is a self imposed shut in is indeed, as you've noted, old.
Meanwhile, I have coworkers that same age who are still writing code and dealing with the toughest customer problems. They are the gurus. When one of them retires, it sucks. These latter, while not exactly young, are not old.
A thread in the Philosophy forum, and a wonderful post there, made me think of how important this is in our Retirement Forum. Significant enough, in my opinion, to merit its own thread here. (And yes I know, the discussion topic is not entirely new to us.)
A knowledgeable poster wrote the following:
"I'm a family medicine provider and I see all ages every workday, from birth to the very, very old. It never ceases to amaze me how differently people can appear (and function) within the same chronological age range.
I have noticed people tend to get old when they believe they are old. They then begin acting old and making old decisions, reinforcing their "old" belief.
Genetics play a big role but so does lifestyle and attitude. You cant run from genetics, but you can change your lifestyle and attitude."
While I have no credentials like the above, this is exactly what I have always felt about the matter. Discussion?
I am "old" because my BODY has BECOME so.
I am disabled.
I have degenerating discs and bones, riddled with bad arthritis, tears in joints and broken or torn ligaments, my body, at soon to be 54 is/has been plumb wearing/worn out!
I've had 20 surgeries to "fix" things. I have at least one more herniated disc to be removed this year. I am positive it won't be my last "fix".
And lest you think THAT I WORE it out, nope. It happened. i used to be "young strong and vibrant" who took care , but as parts keep failing, I have become "old".
I torn both the ACL and MCL ligaments in my knee just getting up off the floor. I used to could "spring right back up". Now I need help to get up off the floor. SO I don't go there anymore!
I have a labral hip joint tear, simply slipped a little on a step.
Well, I SUPPOSE you could call that 'abuse" I call it everyday living..or as the medical profession calls it "ADL: Activities {of} Daily Living".
People need to deal. Old is old. I don't care if unicorns shoot out your backside or your fav saying is "age is just a number" you're old. Deal.
And my fav? "I look/people tell me I look at least 10/20 years younger." Just no.
OK, that last comment from people annoys me too, but it's obvious to me that you and I define old differently. I know 40 yo who are old and 90 yo who are not. Children get cancer--are they old? My 25 yo daughter has grey hairs--is she old? I have more grey hair than my mother did when she was 20 years older but mom was old and grandma was not. Mom had given up but grandma had not--that's the difference.
I'd say the late 60s qualifies as old. Needless to say, many people are active and vibrant long beyond that, but on average you've got about 10 years left.
......
The attitude is the thing. He has a client who worked (self employed) until he was 94; his wife was 87 - lovely couple - they were so positive always; delightful to be around.
........
Could it be that some older people do have great "attitudes" because they are lucky enough to have dodged the big bullets and are still relatively healthy? We would all like to believe that we can ward off bad health and age issues by a good attitude. Unfortunately there is little or no evidence that is the case.
"Old" is when you become too slow, mentally or physically, enough to limit your activities. By this criterion, if you want to be an Olympic athlete, you are "old" at 35 or 40, but if you are content reading all day and cooking, you may get to 80 and still not be "old". Eventually though you reach a point where somebody has to take care of you, or you need a cane, or you are just too slow to engage in some activities with younger people. You may not think you're "old", but at that point you are, whether you like it or not. If I had to totally arbitrarily just make up a number and throw it out there, I'd say 70.
My friend and neighbor, age 75, was young and active until the day he dropped from a fatal heart attack. He always had a project going and I never considered him "old". I'm ten years younger and have young days and old days and always marveled at his energy level. A few problems from my younger years are coming home to roost. I suspect there is a personal tipping point when we have more old days than young days. So far, I haven't hit that yet.
I'd say the late 60s qualifies as old. Needless to say, many people are active and vibrant long beyond that, but on average you've got about 10 years left.
That's me, at 68 y.o, I'm good with what you say...
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