Do you ever think about how much time you have left? (75+, 2014)
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Yes, I do. My grandmother lived to be 92 and one aunt lived to be 95. My oldest living blood relative is an aunt who will be 90 next January.
Not arguing at all, but I didn't know that aunts counted that much. I suppose aunts could, especially if your 90+ aunts share genes with your 90+ grandmother. (unless the 90+ aunts are not offspring of your 90+ grandmother, but even so might increase good chances, though it helps to know when parents passed away). Aunt, meaning a sister of your mother or a sister of your father?
At what age did your parents and siblings pass away? (if you have some and any are deceased or how long have they lived to) only if you feel like saying, of course.
Last edited by matisse12; 03-04-2018 at 12:02 AM..
I've seen a couple of documentaries on age and life expectancy. They referenced studies that do show that genetics plays a strong part in how long a person lives. And also...because of better medical care (for those who get it), that helps a person live a little longer sometimes.
So if living to 95 runs in the family, the odds are that you will, too, if you inherited those genes from that side of the family. Of course, there are other factors, such as smoking when the others didn't, drinking heavily, being obese, not having medical care, and the like.
It would be interesting to get a range on this. GGGrandfather lived to 91. GGrandfather also lived to 91, GGG one after a life which went from being shipped in as captive labor from a British prison to succesful farmer with a large family. GG one chose making his own life on the frontier over the family farm. Grandfather lived to a day before 92, after a successful carrear in set dressing for all those movies from the 30's/40's that are classics now, and his health failed massively. He chose to stay in his bed and died at home as he wished. My female side tended to live into the later 80's, and be healthy. Mom apparently had a timebomb she was born with, an anurism from the heart which burst. Dad lost it mentally with cancer (both smoked like chimneys) and eventually died from cancer. But he'd forgotten his whole life first.
Given that back then there were fewer medical treatments and people lived hard lives, I wonder how much more time especially the women would have had today. The risk for childbirth, for instance, is much much less than a century or two ago.
And I also wonder what the huge pressure on people today to 'make it' and manage in our overcharged and pressure filled society will rob the present generation of time their parents had.
Not arguing at all, but I didn't know that aunts counted that much. I suppose aunts could, especially if they share genes with your 90+ grandmother. (unless the 90+ aunts are not offspring of your 90+ grandmother, but even so might increase good chances, though it helps to know when parents passed away). Aunt, meaning a sister of your mother or a sister of your father?
At what age did your parents and siblings (if you have some and any are deceased or how long have they lived to) pass away? if you feel like saying.
You have to also consider their choices. If they'd been different then the outcome might well have been very different. Both my parents chain smoked. A doctor told me I have imparend breathing, difficulty with deep breaths, from the smoke pit our house was. I don't tolerate smoking around me at all now, but you can't go back in time, especially when she was pregnant with me and smoked. With my son nobody smoked near me, and since as well. He is quite insistant about that too.
My dad died at 77 going on 78. But he had had a fast acting canserous tumor which formed on the OUTSIDE of the lung. It made him short of breath but didn't show the tumor as they never tested for it. When he finally did have surgery, he was almost unable to breath and they had to. He had a very bad doctor. Most of his brothers ended up with lung cancer too, all chain smokers.
Mom was growing weak and tired and the doctor even accused her of making up things. She was going to have tests the next week when she died. But she had an anurism on the main pump of blood out of the heart. She was standing a few feet from me, having a bad day, and feeling so much worse she'd seen the doctor who found nothing. The anurism burst, and she just crumpled limp to the ground. I can still remember it if I choose to. But if we'd known.... It was something she was born with and at that time which was inoperable and we'd have had to watch and wait and wonder if every day was her last too.
No siblings. My cousin and her brothers were almost like them though and we all had the same stubborn personality. They are all still here, even my cousin who would be near 70. The whole family, including their dad, lived up in Napa where the fire was. I'm trying to figure out how to try to contact them.
I often wonder how long Mom would have lived without the anurism as she didn't really have other medical problems. And how much it would have made a difference for me as I adored her and still miss her and might have made different decisions with my life with her to talk to about things.
The topic is a good one although I've not yet read all the replies.
My immediate response is ~ yep, I think almost everyday of how little time I have left, and I earnestly try to deal with that, both in the practical and the spiritual sense.
DH is a great partner in the practical sense - we're in sync on planning for that, still laying it all out - long term health care, estate planning, funeral/cremation.
The spiritual sense is highly individual, I'm in a good place. I'm 69 yo and in excellent health. But if I die tonight, or next week, or in 30 years, it's all good. I'm at peace.
I do read the NY Times obits every few days & take notice of all those I remember in some way passing within a few years of my age, funny how it's more & more! My mother is still alive in her 90's but my father died just into his 70's so the genes are unclear.
"The whole future lies in uncertainty: live immediately... Whatever can happen at any time can happen today.” - Seneca
"The future's uncertain, and the end is always near." - The Doors
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